Blurring The Lines
by spaztronaut
Summary: Ian's POV of The Host. We all know how much Ian loves Wanda, but he didn't always. How did he go from trying to kill her to being in love with her? What was going on in Ian's mind during everything?
1. Guard Duty

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**I hope you guys enjoy this. I know it's short but i'll try to update quickly. Please review and let me know what you think. :)**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 1_

The sun baked the desert air making it hard to breathe. I opened my eyes, only to have to squeeze them shut again. Even with my eyelids closed, I could still feel the sun stinging my eyes. I watched the red and orange dance on the backs of my eyelids. It was too hot out here.

"Ian," Kyle whispered, punching me in the arm. "Look!"

"Ow! What?" I asked, getting to a sitting position. We were on guard duty, positioned on a ridge overlooking the desert. I had been napping, seeing as not much else was going on out here. It was too hot, the parasites weren't stupid enough to be out here in this heat.

The only reason we were out here was because Brandt thought he saw something this morning. He probably saw some animal scavenging for food. The Seekers had no reason to come looking for us now. We hadn't been on a raid in weeks, and even that wouldn't have had them looking in the middle of the Arizona desert. We never raided towns close enough to draw their attention to this area.

"Look," he said, handing me the binoculars.

I lifted them to eyes and quickly scanned the desert before us. "I don't see anything. Maybe you should take a break, I think your seeing things," I laughed.

"Oh, really, then what's that!" He said.

I brought the binoculars back up to my eyes and looked in the direction he was pointing. There was nothing out there, just sand.

"Kyle, there's nothing..." I started to say, but then I saw something. It was blurry at first, but as I stared it became clear. It was a person, stumbling through the desert, miles away from our secret desert sanctuary.

The way they were dragging themselves along made it seem like they had been lost out there for days. I felt bad for them, at first, but then Kyle spoke again.

"Do you think it's a Seeker?" he asked, his voice full of fear and suspicion.

_Was_ it a Seeker? Was it looking for _us_? Did they know where we were? Were there more out there... waiting to see if we would help it? Trying to trick us?

"I don't know. We have to go tell Jeb," I whispered, getting to my feet and heading back towards the cave.

Kyle followed me through the dark tunnels looking for the one person who would know what to do. He always seemed to know what to do.

We found Jeb in the kitchen. It was time for lunch and everyone was there. Kyle ran into the room and everyone, knowing we were on guard duty today, began to panic.

"Jeb, you should take a look at something," Kyle barked.

"What's going on?" he asked. Jeb never lost his cool, ever.

"There's someone out there," I said. Noticing the looks of worry sketched on everyone's faces, I quickly added, "There's only one and their not very close, but I think you should take a look."

"Is it a Seeker?" Jeb asked.

"Can't be sure, but it looks like they've been out there for awhile. The way its dragging itself along, looks like it's not doing so well," I answered.

"Is it a woman?" Jared asked. I hadn't noticed him sitting there beside Jeb. He seemed anxious. Of course he was anxious. His girlfriend, Melanie, had recently been taken. She knew about this place. Jeb was her uncle and he had given her the clues to find it. That's how Jared had gotten here, he followed the clues Melanie had showed him.

I knew exactly what he was thinking. What if she got away? What if she wasn't taken like he thought? What if that was her out there? But it wasn't. It couldn't be.

We had all heard the story, we all knew what happened to Melanie. It had been necessary for us to hear it when Jared had showed up with the boy, Jamie, and Jeb's sister, Magnolia, along with her daughter, Sharon. Melanie's body might be coming to look for us here and we needed to know. We had been on alert for a few months after they had shown up. A few of the others were still a little anxious, but most were beginning to feel comfortable again. But now someone was wandering the desert. If it was Melanie, it was only her body, and that meant a trap. The Seekers liked to play on our emotions that way, but we weren't stupid enough to fall for it.

"Can't tell. It's pretty far out," Kyle answered Jared's question.

"Alright, everyone get back to their lunch. Ian, Kyle and Jared, come with me," Jeb said. The group that had gathered around us now began to break up, but the worried murmurs continued.

We followed Jeb outside and then Kyle and I pointed out where we had seen the body. He stood there for sometime with the binoculars pressed against his eyes. He didn't say a word and neither did we, but Jared looked like he was about to explode. I didn't think he could take much more of this, but, luckily, Jeb turned back towards us.

"Alright, I'm gonna head out there when it gets dark. There doesn't seem to be anybody else out there, so there's no need to panic. You boys head back inside and get to work. Those crops won't grow themselves, now, will they?" Jeb said.

"Jeb, is it..." Jared started, but his voice cracked in pain causing him to trail off.

"Can't see 'em clearly, like Kyle said," Jeb answered, knowing who Jared was talking about. "Could be anyone."

Jared's face turned stiff, the way it did when he was trying to keep his feelings to himself. He had made that face a lot since coming here. He tried to keep everything inside, but I could see how much pain he was in.

"Did you all hear me or do I need to repeat myself?" Jeb said with an authoritative tone to his voice. He always wanted us to know who was in charge. I've got to admit that, in a world like this, with this many people living together, we needed someone to keep the order. And if anyone had to be in charge, I'm glad it was Jeb. He had never been anything but nice to everyone here, unless they deserved it. He was a fair man, and that was important in a leader, especially in this place.

"We're going, we're going," mumbled Kyle, pushing me back towards the caves. Jared hesitated for a second, but then followed us back inside.

You could feel the tension in the air. Everyone in the caves was worried about who the person in the desert was, or more likely what the _parasite_ out in the desert _wanted_. Jeb started the trek outside by himself, he said it was better he go alone. He said too many people might scare it, if it was _human_. If it wasn't... then it was better only one person be killed.

Whoever it was, they were at least a few miles out. It would take Jeb hours to get there and back. Jared tried to watch through the binoculars, but it was too dark. He lost sight of Jeb quickly.

We were all impatient to know what was going on outside. No one in the caves, except for the children, slept that night. I don't think a single person here was able to breathe until Jared spotted Jeb walking back to the caves.


	2. Arguing

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**I hope everyone enjoys this chapter. Thanks to everyone that reviewed. Please review :)**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 2_

It was late, almost dawn, when Jeb finally returned to the caves. Jared, Kyle, and some of the others, along with myself, were waiting at the entrance for him. We all wanted to know if the person outside was a Seeker.

Jeb took his flashlight from his pocket and shined it in his right eye, then his left. Once we were satisfied he was still human, we began questioning him.

"Is it a Seeker?" Kyle asked.

"What does it want?" Trudy questioned.

I looked at Jared, as the rest continued to bombard Jeb. The skin on his face was pulled tight over his jaw, which was clenched. He was gritting his teeth, obviously stressed over whatever was outside. I wasn't sure if he wanted it to be his girlfriend or not. If it was her, she would be one of them, and no one wanted to know their loved ones were replaced by disgusting worms. But at the same time, I thought there might be a little hope in Jared's eyes. If I was him, I would be hoping that somehow it was her, not a replica of her, but really her, herself.

"It's not a Seeker," Jeb said, trying to stifle the onslaught of questions.

"So, it's... _human_, then?" Jared asked, trying to hide the glimmer of hope in his eyes.

"Well, I didn't say that," Jeb answered. He cleared his throat, before continuing. "It's definitely one of them, I checked. We need to go back out. You all come with me," he said, motioning toward the group surrounding him.

Jared stepped forward, the hope completely wiped from his face, but Jeb grabbed his arm and pulled him down the hall, away from the group.

"We should get ready to go," I said. It was a long hike and we would need supplies... and weapons, just in case.

"That's a good idea. I'll get some water, it'll be getting hot out there pretty soon," Trudy said, heading to the kitchen.

"Kyle, where are the weapons?" Maggie asked.

"I'll get them," he said. Geoffrey and I followed him.

We came back with some old tools that could be used as weapons if need be. Besides the gun, the only real weapon we had was a machete. Kyle claimed that for himself. I took a crowbar.

We just wanted to look threatening. Jeb had the rifle, he would shoot it. I wondered why he hadn't brought the rifle out with him the first time. That would have saved us all a lot of trouble now. But maybe it was because he didn't want us to lose our only gun if it was trap.

By the time we got back, Jeb was already there, but Jared was nowhere in sight.

"Where'd Jared go?" Kyle asked.

"He had some work to finish up," Jeb told him. I knew then that the parasite outside was Melanie. Jared wanted to go. He was curious to see who it was. The only reason he wouldn't be going with us was if he already knew who was out there and he didn't want to see them.

"It's like three in the morning, what could he..." Kyle began to ask.

"That's none of your business, Kyle," Jeb said, cutting him off.

A few minutes later, we were outside. It took about an two hours to find the parasite. When we first saw it, everyone was silent, we thought it was dead. It was hot out here. Even at night, the heat was intense and without food or water... it would be nearly impossible to stay alive.

It was lying face down in the dirt beside a dead tree. But after a few seconds, it began to move. Reaching out, it grabbed a canteen that was lying next to it. It sat up, gulping the water as quickly as it could. _No wonder it had run out, it doesn't know how to ration_, I thought.

Dropping the canteen, it sighed and placed it head in it's hands. It was weird how they acted so much like us. If I didn't know any better, I would say that that _thing_ on the ground in front of me was human. I'd say that it was a woman. But I knew better then to trust the facade. It was just a trick. It wasn't human, it wasn't a woman. It was an alien parasite from some other world. The scariest thing imaginable was sitting on the ground, not even ten feet from me, disguised as a girl.

"Why did you give it water, Jeb?" Kyle's angry voice rang out in the quiet desert air.

The parasite turned to face us then, sitting up on its knees. It looked shocked to see us there. Why should it be shocked? It knew there were humans out here. That _is_ why it came all the way out here, after all.

It looked down the line of humans, looking at the weapons we held. It looked scared.

_Good_, I thought, _it should be scared_. We were here to kill it, before it got the chance to kill us.

The parasite rested its eyes on Jeb. I looked at him, too. He still hadn't answered Kyle and it didn't look like he had any intention of doing so. He stared right back at the parasite. What was he doing? He had the gun, why didn't he shoot it?

I heard Kyle scoff and take a step towards the alien. He wasn't going to wait for Jeb to handle things. He was going to do it himself. Kyle raised the machete in his right hand.

"Hold it, Kyle," Jeb said. Maybe he wanted to shoot it, instead of letting Kyle cut it up with the machete. It would be better that way, more humane.

"Why? You said you made sure. It's one of them," Kyle grumbled.

"Well, yes, she surely is. But it's a little complicated." What was he saying? It wasn't complicated. We kill it, or it brings Seekers to kill us.

"How?" I asked. I wanted to know why he thought something so simple was complicated. He knew as well as I did what would happen to our family if we didn't do this.

"See, this here is my niece, too." Was he out of his mind? That thing wasn't his niece. Not anymore.

"Not anymore she's not," Kyle vocalized my thought and took another step towards the alien. He lifted the machete above his head. This whole mess would be over in a moment.

_Click, click_. I turned to see Jeb aiming the gun at Kyle. Trudy gasped.

"I said hold it, Kyle." Jeb's voice was far too relaxed for the situation we were in. He was pointing a _gun _at my brother, a _human_, to protect a parasitic alien _worm_.

"Jeb, what are you doing?" I asked, horrified. How could he possibly be doing this?

Ignoring my question, Jeb never took his eyes off Kyle, who was frozen with the machete still raised above his head.

"Step away from the girl, Kyle," Jeb said.

"It's not a _girl_, Jeb!" Kyle yelled, spinning around to face him.

Jeb just shrugged and kept the gun pointing at Kyle. "There are things to be discussed."

"The doctor might be able to learn something from it," Maggie stated. I hadn't know her long, but I was surprised to hear her say something like that. If that was a member of _my_ family, I wouldn't give her to Doc.

Doc's work was important, but he had been doing this for years now and he still hadn't figured it out. If I were them and this was my niece's body, I'd show some compassion and just shoot her. I couldn't stand to know that her body had been mutilated in the name of science.

"Aunt Maggie?" the creature said, it voice dry and rough from dehydration.

It was still sitting on the ground. I had almost forgotten about it, I was too distracted by Jeb pulling a gun on my brother.

"You're here? How? Is Sharon--" it started to ask, trying to trick us. Maggie ran towards her niece's body and I thought that this was it. But instead of hitting the parasite with the crowbar in her left hand, Maggie slapped it across the face using her right.

The creature's head snapped back. Maggie had hit it pretty hard. Then, before it had a chance to recover from the first blow, she hit it again.

"You won't fool us, you parasite," Maggie bellowed. "We know how you work. We know how well you can mimic us."

"Now, Maggie," Jeb started.

"Don't you 'Now, Maggie' me, you old fool! She's probably led a whole legion of them down on us," she said, backing away from the parasite.

"I don't see anyone," he replied. "_Hey! Over here!_" he yelled waving his free hand around in the air, the other hand still held the gun.

I flinched when he started screaming. What was he thinking? A few of the others were startled by it, too, including the parasite.

"_Shut up_," Maggie whispered, pushing Jeb. I guess she felt uncomfortable raising her voice after his outburst.

"She's alone, Mag. She was almost dead when I found her--she's not in such great shape now. The centipedes don't sacrifice their own that way. They would've come for her much sooner than I did. Whatever else she is, she's alone," Jeb told her.

He walked over to the parasite and extended his right hand towards it. It stared at the hand for a few moments before Jeb spoke.

"C'mon. If I could carry you that far, I woulda brought you home last night. You're gonna have to walk some more," he told it.

"No!" Kyle shouted.

"I'm takin' her back," Jeb said, and it wasn't hard to see that he meant it. Jeb could be very stubborn when he wanted to be.

"Jeb!" Maggie hissed.

"'S my place, Mag. I'll do what I want."

"Old fool!" she said, as Jeb reached down and grabbed its hand.

He dragged it to its feet, where it swayed for a few moments. Behind him, everyone was still making angry noises. No one wanted that thing in our home but Jeb. And he was even going to show it the way.

What if it escaped? It would know where to lead the Seekers. It would know the precise location of my home, _our_ home.

"Okay, whoever you are, let's get out of here before it heats up," Jeb said to it. His voice was kind, too kind to be speaking to the alien who killed his niece.

I stepped closer and placed my hand on his arm. "You can't just show it where we live, Jeb."

I didn't agree with them. I mean, bringing that thing back with us was probably a very bad idea. I could, however, understand them letting Doc have it. But if that was Jeb's plan, he could've told us all that before we left the caves.

"I suppose it doesn't matter. It won't get the chance to tell tales," Maggie said.

Jeb sighed, but pulled the bandanna from his neck. "This is silly."

He wrapped the bandanna around its eyes, and began leading it forward. It looked like it was having trouble walking. Jeb had to guide it along to keep it from tripping. No one spoke, we were paranoid. No one wanted that thing to here what we had to say. Some of the others walked quickly to get away from the parasite. Kyle took off as soon as he was sure it wouldn't try anything.

After a while, only Jeb, Maggie and I remained with the parasite.

"You aren't planning to tell him, are you?" Maggie asked. She was talking about Jamie. That wouldn't be very fair to the kid, to have to see his sister's body with a parasite inside of it. Better they just shoot it quickly or at least get it to Doc without him knowing. I wouldn't want to be around for the family drama that would play out if he did see her.

"He's got a right to know," Jeb answered. Was he serious? That kid was only fourteen years old. What was he thinking?

"It's an unkind thing you are doing, Jebediah," Maggie said.

"Life is unkind, Magnolia."

Maggie left soon after that. We walked along for a few hours, the parasite was very slow. Its legs buckled and Jeb sat it on the ground, letting it drink from his canteen.

"Let me know when your ready," Jeb told it. This was ridiculous. Why was he being nice to it? I know that that body used to belong to his niece, but he knows what's controlling it now.

_This is taking forever_, I thought. If he was going to stop and let it rest every time it needed a drink, we'd be lucky if we were home by nightfall. It was hot out here, I wanted to go home and be done with this alien.

I sighed as I waited for the parasite to drink Jeb's water. "Why are you doing this, Jeb? For Doc? You could have just told Kyle that. You didn't have to pull a gun on him."

"Kyle needs a gun pulled on him more often," Jeb said. I shook my head. This wasn't a time for jokes. If he was doing this because it was his niece's body... It wasn't her anymore and he knew it. Jeb had seen so many things in his life. He had to know better.

"Please tell me this wasn't about sympathy. After all you've seen..."

"After all I've seen, if I hadn't learned compassion, I wouldn't be worth much," Jeb answered flatly. "But no, it was not about sympathy. If I had enough sympathy for this creature, I would have let her die."

"What, then?"

Jeb didn't answer right away, instead he leaned over and took the parasite's hand. After helping it up, he began ushering it forward again. "Curiosity," he finally said.

We walked for another hour or so, before finally reaching the entrance to the caves. I was slightly ahead of Jeb. I could hear him talking to it, telling it to watch its head. I walked faster now that we were safe in the dark cavern. And Jeb obviously didn't need my help, so I rushed forward to find Kyle.

When I reached the main room, everyone was already there. Kyle was standing with a few of the other guys, including Jared.

Jared looked like he was going to rip someone's head off. I guess Kyle already told him what happened. He was silent, staring at the entrance, waiting.

Everyone else was doing the same, only they weren't so silent. An angry murmur filled the room, making it hard to hear anything else.

But when Jeb led the parasite in, you could've heard a pin drop. Jeb had already taken the blindfold off of it, so it looked around the room.

I saw Jared stepping forward, through the crowd. He made his way up to the front and then stopped. When its eyes found his face, it froze... at first. But then it started moving towards him.

"Jared," it croaked, extending its arms out to him. Was it actually stupid enough to think we'd fall for that? Did it really think Jared would welcome it with open arms?

Before it could reach him, Jared backhanded it so hard its feet actually left the ground. It hit the rocks with a thud. Lying on the ground, it whimpered in pain, as Jeb moved to its side. He extended his hand to help it up, but Jared moved towards him.

If Jared wanted to kill the parasite that had murdered his girlfriend, that was his business. I didn't really think Jeb should be getting in the way, but that was Jeb for you. After another minute, Jared backed off, and Jeb helped the bug to its feet. It almost fell over and Jeb had to hang on to its arm to keep it upright. That's when Doc came out.

"Okay, okay. I'm here. What have we got?" he asked.

"Jeb found it in the desert. Used to be our niece Melanie. Seemed to be following the directions he gave her," Maggie said, glaring at Jeb.

"Mm-hm," was all Doc said. He stood there, staring at it for a minute, before repeating, "Mm-hm."

He reached out to touch its chin, and it took a step back, leaning into Jeb.

"It's okay. I won't hurt you," he tried to comfort it. He reached for it again, but this time, when it tried to back away, Jeb held it in place. Doc turned its head, examining the scar on its neck.

When he was done he took a step back. "She looks healthy enough, aside from some recent exhaustion, dehydration, and malnourishment. I think you've put enough water back into her so that the dehydration won't interfere. Okay, then. Let's get started."

He held his hand out to the parasite, but it clenched its hands into tight fists behind its back. It wasn't going to go willingly.

"Kyle, Ian?" Doc called, looking through the crowded room for us. We stepped forward and I could see the fear in the bug's eyes. "I think I need some help. Maybe if you were to carry —"

"No," Jared said.

"Jared? Is there a problem?" Doc asked, just as surprised as the rest of us were by Jared's statement.

"Yes." Maybe he didn't like the idea of giving it to Doc. I could understand that.

"And it is?"

"I'll tell you the problem, Doc. What's the difference between letting you have it or Jeb putting a bullet in its head?"

"Well," Doc breathed.

"The difference is, if Jeb kills it, at least it dies cleanly." Just like I thought, he didn't want his girlfriend's body subjected to Doc's experiments.

"Jared. We learn so much each time. Maybe this will be the time —"

"Hah! I don't see much progress being made, Doc." I agreed with Jared, but he didn't need to be so mean about it. And it wasn't like Doc was wrong, he did learn a lot from his experiments. And if he could discover how to remove the aliens from the human bodies, maybe one day it could save us all. Or, at the very least, allow us to die with dignity, allow us to die human.

"There's no point in wasting an opportunity," Sharon said, stepping in front of Doc. "We all realize that this is hard for you, Jared, but in the end it's not your decision to make. We have to consider what's best for the majority."

"No," Jared growled at her.

"It's not Melanie, Jared. That thing destroyed her. It's evil. They're all evil. And Melanie would want us to do everything we could to fight them," Sharon hissed.

"No," Jared repeated. "He's not going to touch her, do you hear me?"

Kyle stepped forward, towards the argument and I followed him.

"Jared, we're taking it to Doc's. Get out of the way," Kyle growled. I stood beside him, our faces both contorted with anger.

I hated Doc's experiments, but Sharon was right. It was in the best interest of our community. And if Jared wouldn't give it to Doc, would he really be able to take it outside and shoot it. Something had to be done. We couldn't let it go, that was for sure.

"You're not touching it!" Jared yelled. It was starting to look like a fight. Jeb brought his gun up, but it wasn't necessary.

The parasite fainted and the fight was forgotten... for the moment. Jared ran to its side and leaned down close to its face.

"Jamie," it said. "Jamie? Jamie?"

"The kid is fine. Jared brought him here," Jeb answered.

"Thank you," it whispered to Jared, and then it passed out.

Jared remained there for a second before picking up the parasite's limp body. He stood there, looking at Jeb for a moment.

"Alright, everyone get to the game room. Looks like we have some thing's to discuss," Jeb said, pointing his gun at the crowd.

Loud, angry comments could be heard throughout the room, but everyone turned and made their way to the game room like Jeb asked.

Kyle hesitated, but when Jared started walking, so did he. Everyone was so engrossed in their own thoughts and complaints that no one noticed when Jared disappeared. It wasn't until we got to the game room that Kyle spoke up.

"Where's the parasite?" he boomed.

"Now, let's just calm down for a minute," Jeb said, his voice calm and the gun still in his hand. "We _do_ have some things to discuss."


	3. Found

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Review :)**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 3_

Enraged. That's the only way to describe the way everyone was feeling, including me. Jeb had forced us to the game room to discuss what was to be done with the parasite. Only, he wasn't discussing so much as telling us not to touch it. He said that Jared had taken it someplace safe and was guarding it. He said we weren't supposed to look for it.

All the years I've known Jeb, I never truly thought he was crazy. He was always a little eccentric, but I liked that about him, it made him interesting to talk to. Not until this precise moment did I think that he was actually insane.

He wanted to keep that... that _thing_, here, with us. He wanted to let it stay in our home? What right did he have to make that decision for us? Sure, it was his place, as he put it, but really it was everyone's place. We all lived here. Jeb was the leader, yes, but we all contributed to the greater good of the community. And we all deserved a say, especially when it came down to our safety.

That thing would kill us all if it got the chance. Why was Jeb protecting it? It's not his niece. It's not! If he wasn't going to take care of it then we would.

When our _discussion_ was over, I followed Kyle back to our room. I was shocked that Kyle had managed to keep his temper in check. He usually flew off the bat about anything. But tonight, he managed to keep himself moderately in control. I was almost impressed.

Walking down the dark corridor to my room, I started to regain some control of my anger. I knew why Jeb and Jared were trying to protect it. They shouldn't be, that thing was dangerous and they knew it. But they loved the body that it was wearing. They loved the girl who _used_ to be there. But she wasn't there anymore, and they were just having trouble dealing with that.

I understood where they were coming from. It's hard to grieve properly when the bodies of the people you lost were still out there somewhere, alive and well, walking around. It's hard to think of someone as gone when you can still see them.

It's still hard for me, knowing my parents bodies are out there, in our old house, living like nothing ever happened. But it's not them. It's just some look alike. A replica of the real thing. The body is just a reminder of the personality that used to be inside.

Once inside of our room, Kyle sat back on his mattress. I narrowed my eyes questioningly at him, but he just smirked and stayed silent. After a minute or so, there was a knock at the door.

"Come in," Kyle said.

Aaron and Brandt walked in. They stared conspiratorially at Kyle and I felt like I was missing something.

"Jeb's in the kitchen, getting a snack. He'll be going to bed soon," Aaron said.

"Good," replied Kyle, "We'll meet in the game room."

They both nodded and left. I wondered, idly, when Kyle had had the time to make any sort of arrangement with them.

"We're having another meeting," Kyle explained. He must have noticed the confused look on my face. "Were gonna take a vote. Jared can't do this, so it's up to the rest of us to do it for him."

I stared at Kyle. He was being very... well, almost _compassionate_. I could only imagine he was thinking about Jodi. Kyle had lost Jodi when the parasites took over and if it had been her body that showed up here, Kyle knows he wouldn't be able to harm her.

I could relate, I guess. I wasn't in love with anyone before the aliens came, but I don't think I could hurt anyone I knew, even if they weren't really them anymore. If my parents, or Kyle, showed up, a hollow shell of who they once were, I wouldn't let anyone hurt them either.

Kyle was right. Jared was never going to be able to do what had to be done. We had to do it. We didn't love that body the way Jared and Jeb did. We could be unbiased.

An hour later, everyone was in the game room for the second time today. Jeb had, after staying awake all night, finally passed out in his room. Jared wasn't going to be coming out anytime soon. He was guarding the worm. So we were free to hold our own discussion.

It was mid day and the kid, Jamie, would be at school, so he wouldn't find out. He shouldn't find out what his sister was. Better to think she was already dead. He had grieved for her once, he didn't need to have to start all over again.

"Okay, everyone knows why we're here," Kyle said, "So let's get this over with. Everyone who thinks that parasite should be destroyed, raise your hand."

There was no need to count hands. It was unanimous. Everyone in the room had voted 'yes'. They wanted it gone, out of our home.

"Alright, well, Ian and I will handle it then," Kyle announced. I rolled my eyes. He never bothered to ask me what I wanted to do. He always just decided what he wanted and then brought me along for the ride.

"I'll come with you," Brandt said, walking over to us. The others were beginning to filter out of the room. I supposed they were going back to work.

"Fine. Where do you think Jared took it?" Kyle asked. "He's not in his room..."

"Let's start looking. I want to get this over with," I complained. I was stressed. I didn't like the idea of killing something, even if it wasn't human. It was like killing an animal. I didn't want to, but I'd do it for my family. They were counting on me.

Jared couldn't keep that thing here. It'd get away. We couldn't be merciful. Mercy would get us all killed.

We looked everywhere for Jared. Finally, as we walked down the tunnel towards the storage area, we saw a faint blue light. Jared. There was no other reason for anyone to be down here.

"Ah. Here you are," Kyle said, when Jared came into view. He was crouched next to a small hole in the stone wall. One that we usually kept supplies in. I could guess what was in there right now.

Kyle couldn't handle this situation. He wouldn't be able to reason with Jared. Kyle could never reason with anyone. I had to be the one to do this.

"We're not going to allow this, Jared. We've all lost somebody—hell, we've all lost everybody. But this is ridiculous," I told him. He was standing now, positioned in front of the stone cell he was keeping it in. I wondered if he was keeping it in there to keep it from escaping or to keep it from us.

"If you won't let Doc have it, then it's got to die," Kyle bellowed. He couldn't even pretend to be reasonable for five minutes. Again, I had to do this.

"You can't keep it prisoner here. Eventually, it will escape and we'll all be exposed," I reasoned.

Jared remained silent, but stepped in front of the small hole in the wall. Blocking it from us.

"Don't make this difficult, Jared. It has to be done," Brandt added.

"We don't want to hurt you, Jared. We're all brothers here. But we will if we have to. Move aside," Kyle threatened. We wouldn't really hurt Jared, but we would do what we had to to restrain him.

"Jared... please," I almost pleaded.

Jared didn't respond, but Kyle took that as answer enough. He moved forward, towards Jared, who proceeded to punch Kyle in the stomach.

"No!" A girl's voice rang out in the close quarters of the cave.

The parasite jumped out of the small hole it was being kept in. It glanced quickly at all of us standing there, frozen in shock, and then moved in between Jared and Kyle.

Kyle pushed it, almost knocking it down, but Jared reached out and grabbed its wrist before it could fall. He pulled it to its feet, but quickly dropped its hand.

"Get back in there," Jared yelled, pushing it back towards the hole. It stumbled backwards for a second, but moved to place itself between Jared and Kyle again.

"I'm what you want. Leave him alone," it told Kyle.

What? Why did it do that? It looked concerned for Jared. Obviously it was trying to play on his feelings. Jared was protecting it from us, so naturally, it though it had the best chance at manipulating him. It was pretending to care for him.

"Tricky bugger," I said.

"I said get back in there," Jared growled.

It turned halfway towards Jared, but it kept Kyle in its peripheral vision. "It's not your job to protect me at your own expense."

Jared raised his hand, he was going to push it back into the hole. The bug was quicker then he was. It moved out of the way, it moved towards me.

I grabbed it, pinning its arms behind its back. It struggled, but I was stronger. I must have been too rough, because it gasped when I held its arms tighter.

"Get your hands off her!" Jared screamed. He was coming at me, but Kyle grabbed him. Brandt rushed forward, trying to help him restrain Jared.

"Don't hurt him!" the parasite screamed. Manipulating us.

Jared elbowed Kyle in the stomach. He was getting out of Kyle's grip. Before I knew what was happening, Kyle's blood was spattered on the wall. Jared had punched him, broken his nose... again. The bug was still straining against my hold.

"Ian, finish it," Kyle yelled. What? Me? He wanted me to do it. I thought he would be the one...

"No!" both Jared and the parasite screamed. Was she screaming because she was scared for herself, or Jared? It seemed like she was sincerely afraid Jared would be hurt, but that was impossible. It was lying, trying to manipulate us. It knew what was coming and was trying to find a way out of it. It didn't matter now, anyway. I quickly made up my mind. I would finish it like Kyle said.

I let go of its arms and wrapped my fingers around its neck. I squeezed. I could feel it struggling harder. I was strangling it. Killing it. It clawed at my hands. If its nails had been longer, I was sure it would have drawn blood.

The anger I felt for the thing in my hands was frightening. I wanted it dead. It _should_ die, but I felt bad. I felt terrible about _how much_ I wanted to kill it. Once I had my hands around its neck, it was like I couldn't stop.

It had killed everyone I loved. It took away my life, my world, my future. It took everything from me and I wanted revenge. But this girl didn't deserve that. This _body_ didn't deserve to be hated so much. But the girl wasn't in there anymore. No, the alien was in there. It wasn't the same parasite that had killed my parents, but I guess it would do. It had killed the girl, anyway. It murdered Melanie and stole her body.

My grip on its throat tightened as I lifted its flailing body into the air. It was kicking and scratching at my fingers. I didn't feel anything. I felt numb. Like this wasn't real. It couldn't be. This wasn't me. I would never do something like this.

The girl in my hands wasn't real. Wasn't a girl. It was an insect, a centipede. They were disgusting, I had seen them before. I knew what they were. This one wasn't going to trick me. It wasn't really murder. The parasite had already murdered the girl. She was dead. This, what I was doing, was like squashing a bug. Swatting a fly. A very dangerous fly that would have us all killed if it got away.

_Click, click_. The gun... again. Jeb was here, but I didn't care. I kept my grip firm on the bug's neck.

"Kyle, Ian, Brandt—back off!" Jeb was angry. More than angry. He never yelled, not really. He was usually so calm all of the time.

A quick glance towards Kyle showed the others frozen in place. No one was moving except for the parasite, who was still flailing in my hands. It was suffocating. I couldn't see its face, but I could imagine what it looked like. Blue from lack of oxygen? Probably more of a purple, actually. It was struggling as hard as it could against me. I think it was in pain.

I didn't see Jared move away from Kyle. I didn't see him lunge at me. But I felt in when his fist made contact with my jaw. I wailed and dropped the parasite to the floor. It lay there gasping at my feet, while I covered jaw and swore quietly to myself.

"You're guests here, boys, and don't you forget it. I told you not to go looking for the girl. She's my guest, too, for the moment, and I don't take kindly to any of my guest's killing any of the others," Jeb said. His voice was still angry, but he was calmer than before.

"Jeb," I moaned, trying to reason with him, although what I really wanted to do was knock Jared the hell out for hitting me. "Jeb. This is insane."

"What's your plan?" I heard Kyle ask from behind me. I didn't bother turning around. I kept my eyes on Jeb, waiting for his answer. "We have a right to know. We have to decide whether this place is safe or if it's time to move on. So... how long will you keep this thing as your pet? What will you do with it when you're finished playing God? All of us deserve to know the answers to these questions." I was almost shocked at how articulate Kyle was. He had clearly thought this through. He didn't usually do that. He usually just came out swinging and hoped for the best.

"Don't have your answers, Kyle. It's not up to me," Jeb stated.

What was he talking about? Of course it was up to him. He was the one holding the gun on us, refusing to let us kill it. It was still lying on the floor next to me, I could hear it gasping for breath, but I never took my eyes off Jeb. What was he saying? Who's decision was it, if not Jeb's?

"Not up to you? Who, then? If your thinking of putting it to a vote, that's already been done. Ian, Brandt, and I are the duly designated appointees of the result," Kyle said.

Jeb shook his head, keeping his eyes on Kyle. "It's not up for a vote. This is still _my house_."

"_Who, then?_" Kyle screamed.

"It's Jared's decision."

I shifted my gaze to Jared, then. He was staring, wide-eyed, mouth agape, at Jeb. He looked the way I felt.

"Jared? That makes no sense! He's more biased than anyone else! Why? How can he be rational about this?" Kyle was losing it now, he was practically incoherent.

"Jeb, I don't..." Jared started, but Jeb cut him off.

"She's your responsibility, Jared. I'll help you out, of course, if there's anymore trouble like this, and with keeping track of her and all that. But when it comes to making decisions, that's all yours." Jeb said. Then, looking at Kyle, added, "Look at it this way, Kyle. If somebody found your Jodi on a raid and brought her back here, would you want me or Doc or a vote deciding what we did with her?"

"Jodi is dead," Kyle spit. That was low, everyone knew Jodi was Kyle's weak spot. In had been six years and I still caught him staring out into space every once in a while, a tear in his eye. We never talked about it, but I knew how much he was still hurting. Jeb shouldn't have brought her up, even though I know he was just trying to get his point across.

I looked at Kyle, his face covered in his own blood. He was scowling at the parasite on the ground, next to my feet. She wasn't gasping for breath anymore, now it was more of a wheezing.

"Well, if her body wandered in here, it would still be up to you. Would you want it any other way?"

"The majority—" Kyle tried.

"My house, my rules," Jeb barked. "No more discussion on this. No more votes. No more execution attempts. You three spread the word—this is how it works from now on. New rule."

"_Another one_," I mumbled through the hand I still held to my throbbing jaw.

"If, unlikely as it may be, something like this ever happens again, whoever the body belongs to makes the call." Jeb said. He pointed the rifle he was holding towards Kyle and then motioned with it for us to leave. "Get out of here. I don't want to see you anywhere around this place again. You let everyone know that this corridor is off-limits. No one's got any reason for being here besides Jared, and if I catch someone skulking around, I'm asking questions second. You got that? Move. Now."

Kyle, Brandt, and I took our cue and left. We weren't happy about it, but it was best to do what Jeb said. Especially when he was serious about something. And to my dismay, he was very serious about this.

When we made it back to the main room, some of the others were there waiting. Andy, Paige, Geoffrey, Trudy, Heath, Maggie, Sharon, and even Doc, were there waiting for us to tell them some good news.

"I saw Jeb head down there, did you do it? Is it gone?" Andy asked. Paige was pressed close against his side. She had been a wreck ever since that thing got here, but Paige was usually a wreck when she was nervous about something.

"No," Kyle grunted. Out here in the light, I could see the blood streaking his face. Jared had gotten him pretty good, his nose was broken. But Kyle was always getting hit in the face, i don't even think he could feel the pain anymore. He was too used to it.

"What do you mean _no_?" Maggie questioned. There was hatred in her eyes, but I knew that was for Jeb. She hated her brother for keeping that thing here and putting us all in danger.

"Jeb made a new rule," I said. Grunts and groans went up through the crowd. Everyone hated it when Jeb came up with new rules on the spot like this. He was always creating them whenever he felt like it. Usually I didn't mind, but this time was different. "Jared gets to make the decision. The body belongs to him, so he chooses what we do with it."

"They're going to get us all killed because of that thing!" Sharon shrieked, throwing her hands up in the air. She looked so angry, although she usually was angry. I didn't know how Doc put up with her. He looked so nice and compassionate standing next to her while she threw a tantrum right in the center of the big cavern.

"Well, no one's supposed to go down that tunnel. Jeb said it's off-limits," I added. Kyle rolled his eyes at me and stalked away. _I_ wasn't happy about Jeb's decision either, why was he being like that?

The other's continued to question us, but I wasn't really up for it. I walked away leaving Brandt to fend for himself while they interrogated him.

I made my way through the dark halls until I came upon the red and gray doors. I removed the red door and walked into my room, quickly replacing the door behind me. I hadn't slept in more than twenty-four hours and I was exhausted. I flopped down on my mattress and put my arms behind my head like a pillow.

I didn't know where Kyle went, and I really didn't care. He would be a nightmare to deal with, now that his plan had failed. The parasite was still alive. It was being guarded by Jeb and Jared.

I breathed a sigh of relief and realized I was glad the parasite wasn't dead. Well, maybe not that it wasn't _dead_, but that _I_ hadn't killed it. It would escape and turn us all in if something wasn't done about it, it probably should be killed. I had voted for it to be killed just a couple of hours ago. But now that I had actually tried, now that I had almost succeeded, I didn't want to try again. I didn't like the disconnected, numb feeling I had felt. It felt like it wasn't me, but it _was_ me. I thought about how it felt to have my fingers locked in a death grip around its throat. I thought about what it felt like to have her fingers clawing at mine.

I moved my right hand from behind my head and held it out in front of me. I flexed my fingers and looked at the scratches on the back of my hand. It was almost like proof of the crime I committed.

_I didn't do anything wrong_, I corrected. I couldn't let myself feel guilty about this. It wasn't human. It would kill me and everyone I knew if I let it. It should die. But, if that was the case, why did the scratches all over the back of my hands make me feel nauseous? Why should I feel guilty if it was the right thing to do?

I stared out through the cracks in the ceiling for a minute, but then my eyelids started to droop and I knew I would be unconscious soon enough. I couldn't think about that _thing_ right now. It made me feel angry and anxious and guilty all at once. I was too tired for that, so I closed my eyes and drifted off into a deep sleep.


	4. Interrogation

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Thanks to everyone for their great reviews. I love hearing that you guys like this story. And I love it when you guys review :)**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 4_

Over the next few nights, Kyle continued to visit the storage area. I told him it was useless, told him it wouldn't work, told him _that_ was the reason I didn't want to go with him. And it was the reason... part of it, anyway.

Jared and Jeb wouldn't let him anywhere near that thing. But I still felt strangely guilty and I didn't like it. It had gotten slightly worse after that first night. I thought about it, a lot. I thought about why I wanted it dead. I wanted revenge. Sure, I wanted to protect my family here, keep them safe from the Seekers. But I also wanted to get even with that thing. I knew it wasn't the same parasite that had killed my family, but I didn't care, any parasite would do.

I hated that feeling. I didn't want to feel that way. How had I let myself become so angry? I couldn't remember ever feeling this angry, especially not since finding the caves. What was wrong with me? Was I so vengeful that I would kill an innocent creature because of what another of its kind did?

It wasn't exactly innocent, it _had_ killed Melanie, but it wasn't guilty of what I blamed it for. I couldn't kill it. I was taking my anger out on something that didn't deserve it. I wouldn't be killing it because it was a danger to us. I would be killing it because I _wanted_ to murder it. It was wrong to feel that way. I couldn't differentiate between revenge and righteousness, so I wouldn't do anything.

That thought didn't make me feel any better, though. Not when Jamie glared at me. Every time I saw him, he would be glowering in my direction. He had found out about the parasite, he knew what I had done to it, and he was mad. I could barely bring myself to look at the kid. I usually just stared at the ground until he was out of sight.

I needed a distraction, and I got one, only it wasn't really a distraction. There were a group of Seekers out in the desert, a search party. They didn't come anywhere near us, but it still caused a panic in the caves. No one liked having that many Seekers in the desert, it was just too close.

We watched them, taking shifts and never letting them out of our sight. After a few days, they weren't expecting to find the parasite alive anymore. Then, when a coyote attacked one of the Seekers, they decided they wouldn't even find the body. They were right, if a body _had_ been out there, the scavengers would have picked it to pieces.

Kyle and I were watching them. There was one, a woman, she was short, with dark hair. She wore all black, which I thought was strange seeing as she was in the desert, and carried a Glock. She wasn't pleased when the other Seekers called off the search. She was almost fighting with them.

It was odd, the bugs never fought. They never got angry, but this one was different. It seemed angry all the time. It even seemed to tick the others off a little. It didn't want to give up, it kept trying to convince them, but they left anyway.

The unhappy Seeker, however, stayed. It drove back and forth, up and down the highway. It stopped at a little convenience store along the road, questioning the parasite that worked there. Then it went for a hike up the mountain. It was like this parasite's, the one in Melanie's body, disappearance was personal to it. Like _it_ wanted to find her more than the others did.

We discussed all of this with Jeb and the others, Jeb didn't seem bothered by the unhappy Seeker's obsession. He thought that as long as the majority of Seekers were gone, then the one Seeker would quickly give up.

Jared wasn't there, of course, he was still guarding the worm. I wasn't sure if Jeb had told him about all this or not, but I wanted to ask him what he thought. He was good at this sort of thing. He made good decisions and I wanted to hear his take on it. So that night I headed down to the storage room.

Jared appeared to be sleeping on the ground in front of the hole in the wall, where he was keeping the parasite. He jumped up onto his knees, the gun ready in his hands, when he heard me coming down the hall.

"Easy. I come in peace," I said.

"Whatever your selling, I'm not buying," Jared told me.

"I just want to talk. Your buried down here, missing all the important discussions... We miss your take on things," I explained, coming closer.

"I'm sure."

"Oh, put the gun down. If I was planning to fight you I would have come with four guys this time."

When Jared spoke again, he seemed a little more at ease. "How's your brother these days?" he joked, sitting against the wall in front of the hole, gun still in hand.

"He's still fuming about his nose," I said. "Oh, well—it's not the first time it's been broken. I'll tell him you said you were sorry."

"I'm not."

"I know. No one is ever sorry for hitting Kyle," I laughed and so did he.

"So what do you want, Ian? Not just an apology for Kyle, I imagine."

"Did Jeb tell you?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"They've given up the search. Even the Seekers."

Jared didn't say anything, so I continued to explain everything we knew about what was going on outside. I told him about the coyote attack and the unhappy Seeker and about how she was still searching around the highway.

When I told him about how it had gone up the peak, the parasite in the small hole hissed loudly. I looked, shocked, into the hole. It was just a dark shape against the back wall, but I could see its arms covering its face protectively.

"What was _that_?" I asked Jared. The parasite was visibly shaking.

Jared reached over to grab the lamp that was sitting on the floor a few feet away. He brought it back up so that we could see what was going on with the alien.

That's when I saw her. Her eyes, she looked so scared. Was she scared because the Seekers had stopped looking? Because they wouldn't rescue her?

"Look at its eyes. It's frightened," I murmured, staring at the girl who was now peeking at us through her fingers.

"Who is the Seeker in black?" Jared demanded.

She was still shaking. I didn't think she'd be able to talk even if she wanted to.

"I know you can talk. You talk to Jeb and Jamie. And now you're going to talk to me," he said, crawling into the tight space. He had some trouble getting in there and he was obviously uncomfortable when he did. "Tell me what you know."

The parasite looked like it wanted to run, but it had nowhere to go. There was no way it'd even be able to move with Jared stuffed in the hole with it.

"Who is the Seeker in black? Why is it still searching?" Jared yelled, his voice echoing in the small space.

It brought its hands back up to cover its face. It was waiting to be hit again. She thought Jared was going to hit her, and he probably was going to. His fingers were twitching.

"Ah—Jared?" I said. "Maybe you should let me..."

"Stay out of it!" he screamed.

He was scaring it. It was already afraid of him and if he kept this up he'd never get it to talk. I climbed into the whole behind him. "Can't you see it's too scared to talk? Leave it alone for a sec—"

Jared, turning around faster then I would have thought possible in the cramped space, punched me in the face. I cursed as I fell out of the hole and onto the ground.

I spit on the floor. "That's twice," I grunted.

"I'm ready to go for three," he said. He was lucky I didn't beat the crap out of him right there.

He turned back to the bug then, lamp in hand. "Who. Is. The. Seeker."

It dropped it hands and stared him in the eye. His voice was quieter when he spoke. "I don't have to hurt you. But I do have to know the answer to my question. Tell me." He sounded frustrated.

"The Seeker," it croaked.

"We already know it's a Seeker," Jared said impatiently.

"No, not just any Seeker. _My_ Seeker," it whispered.

"What do you mean, _your_ Seeker?"

"Assigned to me, following me. She's the reason —" it cut off abruptly.

"The reason?"

"The reason I ran away. The reason I came here."

I stared at it, eyes wide. She had run away from a Seeker to come here. To the middle of the desert? To come find us, humans, because it wanted to get away from the Seeker? That didn't make any sense.

"You ran away from a Seeker? But you're one of them! Why would it follow you? What did it want?"

It swallowed loudly. "You," it whispered, "You and Jamie."

"And you were trying to lead it here?" he asked, his voice hard, angry.

"I didn't... I..." It was shaking its head, searching for the right words.

"What?"

"I... didn't want to tell her. I don't like her."

She didn't _like_ the Seeker? Well, if it was the Seeker we saw outside, none of the others seemed to like her either.

"Don't you all have to like everyone?" Jared asked after a second.

"We're supposed to," it said in a low voice. It sounded a little ashamed.

If it didn't tell the Seeker about this place then it must have told someone. The parasites were always hunting us. They wanted our bodies. They needed them to house more aliens.

"Who did you tell about this place?" I asked.

"I couldn't tell—I didn't know... I just saw the lines. The lines on the album. I drew them for the Seeker... but we didn't know what they were. She still thinks their a road map."

"What do you mean you didn't know? You're here," Jared said, flexing his hand towards her.

Its lie didn't make any sense. Obviously, it had figured out what the clues meant. It could have easily told the Seeker, or anyone else for that matter, once it figured it out. Even if it hadn't discovered all of the clues, it still figured out our general vicinity. Just that was enough to get the Seekers to scour the desert in search of us.

"I... I was having trouble with my... with the... with her memory. I didn't understand... I couldn't access everything. There were walls. That's why the Seeker was assigned to me, waiting for me to unlock the rest."

I glanced at Jared, who looked back at me. I couldn't believe what it just said. There were _walls_? She was trying to unlock it?

I wanted to believe, I wanted to believe so badly. It was saying the human inside could block some of the information, even if it was just for a short while. And since she was here now, it meant that she had finally broken through those walls. But just knowing that maybe we could have some speck of control left when we were taken, was more then we had ever dreamed possible.

"Were you able to _access_ my cabin?" Jared demanded.

"Not for a long time," it said. I didn't know what they were talking about, Jared had never mentioned a cabin.

"And then you told the Seeker," he stated.

"No."

"No? Why not?"

"Because... by the time I could remembered it... I didn't _want_ to tell her."

Why wouldn't it tell a Seeker about a possible location of humans? That's what they did. If one of the normal parasites saw a human, they called the Seekers. What could possibly make this one forego their rules, or whatever? They didn't have laws the way he did, but they all acted the same, followed some set of unwritten laws.

When Jared spoke his voice was soft and low. "Why didn't you want to tell her?"

It stayed silent. Its jaw clenched in determination. She wasn't going to answer this question. It was obvious.

Jared seemed to understand. He changed the subject. "Why weren't you able to access everything? Is that... normal?"

"She fell a long way. The body was damaged," it said.

I could practically see the neon sign above her head that said '_I'm lying_'. This girl was definitely not a Seeker. They were much better liars than this. I raised an eyebrow, skeptically, at her and she seemed to know that we weren't buying it.

I decided to let it go, there were other answers we needed to know. "Why isn't this Seeker giving up like the rest?"

She leaned back against the wall and closed her eyes. "I don't know. She's not like other souls. She's... _annoying_."

Something about the way she said it made me laugh, just once. The way she complained about it, it made her seem almost... almost _human_.

"And you—are you like other... _souls_?" Jared asked.

Her eyes flashed open and she stared at him for a few seconds. Then she buried her head in her knees. She was done talking.

Jared began inching his way backwards, out of the hole. When he was fully out, he stretched his arm and legs. I'm sure he hadn't been very comfortable in there.

"That was unexpected," I whispered, trying to keep my voice low. I couldn't believe it had told us all of that. I was pretty sure it was telling the truth. The one time it _had_ lied was such a train wreck, it made everything else it had said completely believable.

"Lies, of course," Jared whispered. "Only... I can't quite figure out what it wants us to believe—where it's trying to lead us."

"I don't think it's lying. Well, except the one time. Did you notice?"

"Part of the act."

"Jared, when have you ever met a parasite that could lie about anything? Except a Seeker, of course."

"Which it must be."

"Are you serious?" I couldn't believe he could still think that. After hearing her speak, it was painfully clear that this wasn't a Seeker.

"It's the best explanation."

"She—_it_ is the furthest thing from a Seeker I've ever seen. If a Seeker had any idea had to find us, it would have brought an army."

"And they wouldn't have found anything. But she—_it_ got in, didn't it?"

Did he really think that it was that manipulative? It wasn't, anyone could tell that it wasn't. Why would she have come, knowing we would kill her on the spot? "It's almost been killed half a dozen —"

"Yet it's still breathing, isn't it?" he hissed.

He wasn't going to see reason here. It wasn't a Seeker, but he wanted to hate it, the way I had wanted to hate it the other night. I thought back to when I had tried to kill it. The way it had kicked and squirmed away from me, still fresh in my mind.

When Jared was interrogating it, when the light was on its face, I saw the bruises on her neck. They were a sickly black and blue color by now. Big, dark bruises that ran the whole way around her neck. Those bruises, the outline of my hands, were the most horrific thing I've ever seen, including the alien invasion.

Now that I had heard her out, heard her speak and explain, I felt even worse. The sudden surge of guilt was almost too much for me to handle. She was right there, sitting only a few feet away from me, scared to death that we would injure her again. I needed to get out of here.

"I think I'm going to go talk to Jeb," I whispered. He would know what we should do. He already seemed to. He was the one who had refused to let us kill it. He would want to hear this.

"Oh, _that's_ a great idea," Jared said sarcastically.

"Do you remember that first night? When it jumped between you and Kyle? That was bizarre." I said, suddenly remembering how strange it was. At the time I thought it was trying to manipulate Jared, but now... I wasn't sure about anything anymore.

"It was just trying to find a way to stay alive, to escape..."

"By giving Kyle the go-ahead to kill her—it? Good plan," I said incredulously.

"It worked."

This was getting ridiculous. He wasn't seeing what was right in front of his eyes. "Jeb's gun worked. Did she know he was on his way?"

"You're over-thinking this, Ian. That's what it wants."

"I don't think your right," I told him. I thought about her, sitting there in that hole. She'd been here a week, if she was going to try to escape, wouldn't she have done it already? She wasn't complaining, she barely spoke at all. Jeb had told us that he practically had to drag her to the latrine. "I don't know why... but I don't think she wants us to think about her at all."

I got up, I wasn't going to argue with him about it anymore. "You know what's really twisted?" I said.

"What's that?" he asked.

"I felt guilty—_guilty_ as hell—watching her flinch away from us. Seeing the black marks on her neck." I wanted to say that out loud. I wanted her to hear me. It was the only way I knew to apologize.

"You can't let it get to you like that. It's not human. Don't forget that." He wasn't happy with my admission.

I started down the hall. "Just because she isn't human, do you think that means she doesn't feel pain? That she doesn't feel just like a girl who's been beaten—_beaten_ by us?"

"Get a hold of yourself," he called after me.

"See you around, Jared." I continued down the hall, thinking about what I had learned.

She wasn't lying, I really didn't believe that she was lying. The one time she had lied was too obvious. And she couldn't be some sort of espionage-trained Seeker. She didn't have what it would take to come up with and follow through on such an intricate plan.

My gut told me I was right. She was just a helpless girl, who we had beaten the crap out of. Jared was right, she wasn't human. But did that give us the right to treat her like that?

I quickly found Jeb. He was in the kitchen, looking for a snack. Trudy, Heidi, and Lily were all there making bread for tomorrow. They looked up at me when I walked in.

"Hi, Ian," Lily smiled. The others just nodded.

I nodded back in their direction, but kept my eyes on Jeb. He had also seen me come in and looked a little frustrated. He probably thought I was here to complain about the parasite some more.

"Jeb, I need to talk to you," I said.

"What about?" he asked.

"I went to talk to Jared —"

"I told you not to go down there anymore," he cut me off. "Can't you listen to simple instructions?"

"I just wanted to tell him about the Seekers. I wanted to know what he thought about the whole matter," I said, and then I glanced quickly at Lily and the other women. I wasn't sure I should tell him all of this here, in front of them.

"C'mon," Jeb said, motioning with his head for me to follow him.

We walked all the way to the game room. It was late, no one would be down here right now.

Jeb stopped and spun on his heel to face me. He had one of his eyebrows raised. He was waiting to hear what I had to say.

"Jared and I were discussing the Seeker and the girl, well, she sort of freaked out," I tried to explain.

"What do you mean, _freaked out_?" Jeb asked, his voice was tight. Was he worried about it?

"It's alright. We didn't do anything to it," I told him. "It was... afraid, I think... of the Seeker. She doesn't seem to like the one that's still out there."

"Oh, and how would know that?"

"She, well... she, sort of, told us."

Jeb raised both of his eyebrows this time. "Did she, now?"

"She seemed afraid of it. Jared and were questioning her and she answered all of our questions. Jared thinks she was lying, but..." Did I really believe it? If I was going to tell Jeb, then that meant I believed it.

"But?" he pressed.

"But I don't think it was lying," I told him, my voice confident. I knew it was telling the truth, I don't know why, but I could feel it. "It said all kinds of things. Things that... well, things that, if their true, would be incredible."

"Go on," he nodded.


	5. Change Of Heart

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Thanks to everyone who has read and reviewed so far. You guys are the best. :)**

**Okay, so I'm not the biggest fan of this chapter, but I got writer's block and just pushed through anyway. Let me know what you think, because I still can't make anything of it. Maybe your comments could help. :)**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 5_

I told Jeb everything that the parasite had said when Jared and I were questioning it. He was very interested, but then again Jeb was always interested in things. He was a naturally curious man.

When I was finished, I walked slowly back to my room. I knew that I was being crazy, but I believed the parasite. I wasn't exactly sure about what that meant though. What would we do with it now? Before there had only been one choice, it had to die. But now, what could we do? I didn't really want it dead anymore, but what other option was there?

I reached my room and quickly made my way in. Kyle was sitting on his bed, playing solitaire with a deck of cards we had stolen on a raid a few years back. They were worn, but then again, so was everything else in this place.

"Where were you?" he asked, flipping over a Jack of Clubs. He squinted at his cards thoughtfully for a moment before making his move.

I sat down on my mattress and sighed. I really didn't want to tell him the truth. He would be furious with me. But I could tell him I talked to Jared without mentioning the conversation with the parasite, right?

"I wanted to talk to Jared," I said, bracing myself for his reaction. Kyle always over-reacted.

"You _what_?" he asked, looking up at me for the first time. His reaction wasn't as bad as I would have thought, but he could be pushed over the edge easily enough.

"I wanted to ask him what he thought about the Seekers outside, that's all," I huffed.

"Why didn't you tell me? We could've of —"

"Could've what, Kyle? Went down there and murdered the parasite together?"

He looked confused by my outburst, but confusion soon took a back seat to concern. "What's gotten into you lately? You're in your head too much, Ian. I know you've been feeling guilty but... You have to stop. You have nothing to feel guilty about."

Why was he only observant when I didn't want him to know what I was feeling? "I don't know what you're talking about," I said, laying back on my pillow.

"Ian, you know what we did was right. I only wish we had finished the job," he mumbled the last part to himself.

"Why was it right? Huh? Why do we have the right to kill it? Why do we—"

"Listen to yourself," he half shouted at me, "It's getting to you. Don't let it effect you like that. Don't feel guilty, it's not human."

"I know that! Alright? I know it's not human. That doesn't mean that I can just kill it like some sort of an animal," I shouted back.

"Yes, it does! It is dangerous and you know it. You know what their capable of, you know what it will do if it gets out!"

I laid there for a minute, staring at the cracks in the ceiling, my right hand tangled in my hair. I didn't respond to him and for once he seemed to respect that.

He was right, if it got out it would destroy us, only I didn't think it was looking to get out. I would never tell Kyle that, though. He wouldn't understand, he wanted it gone and he wouldn't see the situation any other way. Jared was protecting it and not even he could see the truth. Just like Kyle, he believed it was a Seeker who had come out here to find us.

I thought back on how scared she was, peeking at me from behind her hands. A Seeker wouldn't have cowered from us like that. It would have lied or tried to find some way out of here, but she hadn't. I knew she had told us nothing but the truth, I knew she wasn't a Seeker. But other than that, I was utterly confused by her. I mean, she was still one of them, still a parasite. The enemy... We would eventually have to do something about her.

Kyle seemed to have lost interest in our _talk_ and went back to playing cards.

I slowly got to my feet and walked towards the door.

"Where are you going?" Kyle asked.

"I have to take a piss, if that's alright with you?" He was really getting on my nerves.

"No, go right ahead," he motioned that it was alright for me to go. I really wish I had something to throw at him then.

I eventually made my way down to the river room. It was dark, I could barely see two feet in front of me. Good thing I knew this place like the back of my hand, or I might have accidentally stumbled into the river.

I sat down on the ground, listening to the babble of the rushing water. It was very peaceful. So much more peaceful than sitting in my room with Kyle.

I sat there for while trying to clear my mind. And it worked, sort of, anyway. But it didn't matter, I only came down here to get away from Kyle, and once enough time had past I headed back to my room.

Just like I thought, Kyle was sleeping. I crawled into my bed, hoping that everything would make more sense in the morning.

It didn't. And it wasn't the morning when I awoke.

"Hurry up," someone was saying.

"Yeah, yeah. I'll be there in a minute," Kyle grumbled.

"We're leaving in a half hour. Meet me in the kitchen, I'm gonna go get the others."

I opened my eyes and saw Jared walking from the room. I glanced over at Kyle, who was packing his bag. They were going on a raid.

I huffed and sat up in my bed. Kyle turned around to look at me.

"You know you guys should really keep your voices down when someone's sleeping," I said.

"Aw, did we wake you up, Ian?" he said in his lame attempt at baby talk. Then he threw his bag over his shoulder and headed for the door. "Night, Bro."

"Don't do anything stupid," I warned.

He was in the hall now, with the door in his hands. "When have you ever known me to do anything stupid?" he smirked, replacing the door.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. Kyle would get us all killed one day, I had no doubt of that.

I sat there for a while, not tired enough to go back to sleep. I thought some more about the parasite. I still felt guilty. I still didn't know what to do with it. I tried to think of something, some way to let it live without it putting us all in danger. I guess we could guard it, like Jeb was doing. Now that Jared was gone, I was sure Jeb would need some help watching it.

Without Kyle, I wasn't sure who would try to kill it. But someone would try. And soon, too. They'd want to get rid of it before Jared got back. It would be easier without him here. _I_ could do it easily without him here, but I didn't want to kill it. The guilt surged through me at even the thought of hurting her again. It would be unfair. She didn't do anything. She didn't give us up to the Seekers, she didn't try to escape. She didn't seem to be a danger. I didn't know what I would do, but I knew I would keep tying to find a solution. We wouldn't be able to guard her forever.

Eventually, the room became bright. I looked up at the cracks and deduced that it must be close to breakfast. I made my way down to the kitchen, saying good morning to a few people along the way. I got some food and went to stand over by Wes. We were talking when we heard Jeb coming into the kitchen.

"This way's the kitchen," he said.

The parasite was with him. When she saw all of the people in the room, she tried to press herself as close to the wall as she could. She was trying to hide behind Jeb, but when he walked further into the kitchen, she decided to stay where she was.

She looked around the room a few times. Her eyes landing on some of the people here, Maggie, Sharon, Doc, and eventually me. I saw her eyes bug out of her head when she saw me there, leaning against the counter. The guilt washed over me again. She was afraid of me. _Me_. The one who had strangled her.

I could see the marks on her neck again and felt ashamed of myself. Even though I knew no one here, besides Jamie that is, cared that I had hurt her, I still felt like they were judging me. I felt like I was on trial and those marks were the evidence that would convict me.

"Everybody full so quick?" Jeb said, his voice full of sarcasm.

I realized that I had been staring at the girl and quickly averted my eyes. I didn't want her to think that I was going to attack her or something.

"Lost our appetites," Maggie mumbled.

Jeb turned to the parasite. "What about you? You hungry?"

Almost everyone in the kitchen groaned simultaneously at that. It had to eat, Jeb had been bringing it food twice a day since it got here. They knew that. I didn't know what they were complaining about.

She shook her head frantically and it just made me feel even worse. She had to be hungry, but she wouldn't eat. She was probably too afraid, everyone in the room was staring daggers at her.

Jeb was making his way back to her with a roll in his hand. "Well, let's just keep on movin'. Nobody seems able to concentrate on their lunch. Easily distracted, this set."

I was still watching the parasite when I saw Jamie jump from his seat on the counter and follow Jeb. I couldn't even imagine what he was going to do.

"Whatcha need, kid?" Jeb asked him.

"Just wondering what you're doing," Jamie answered. He didn't seem upset, more curious than anything.

"Takin' her for a tour of the place. Just like I do for any newcomer."

Another groan went through the room and I was no exception to the rest this time. I wasn't sure I agreed with giving it a tour. Just because I believed her didn't mean I trusted her enough to let her loose on this place. Besides if he was going to let her out, they would try to kill her even faster.

"Can I come?" Jamie asked.

"Doesn't bother me... if you can mind your manners," Jeb told him.

"No problem."

"Let's go," Jeb said to both the parasite and the boy.

As they made their way from the room, my curiosity got the better of me. I wanted to know what was happening with the girl. I wanted to know if I was right to believe her. I figured a good way to do that would be to follow along after them.

When I reached the exit of the kitchen, I noticed Doc was heading after them, too. He smiled at me and raised an eyebrow in my direction. I shrugged and continued forward next to him.

The parasite heard us coming and quickly swept Jamie behind her. Protecting him. It was strange, but I didn't have anytime to think about what it could mean. Jeb spun on his heel and aimed the rifle in our direction.

I raised my hands above my head, surrendering. I really didn't feel like getting shot today. I guess Doc felt the same way because he quickly followed suit.

"We can mind our manners, too," Doc said.

Jeb looked at me then.

"I don't mean any trouble, Jeb. I'll be just as mannerly as Doc," I told him.

"Fine. Just don't test me. I haven't shot anybody in a real long time, and I sort of miss the trill of it," he joked.

I guess the parasite didn't get it, because it gasped. We all turned to see her face frozen in horror. She was frightened by us humans, the same way we were scared of her. It was kind of funny. Doc started laughing and the rest of us joined him. Except the girl, of course.

"It's a joke," Jamie whispered and the parasite dropped its arm from in front of the kid.

"Well the day's wasting. You'll all have to keep up, 'cause I'm not waiting on you," Jeb said, walking forward down the tunnel.

Jeb showed it around the caves, explaining everything as he went. It was just like when Kyle and I first got here, and just as boring. Doc and I walked behind the others. I noticed the girl stayed as far away from us as possible. She was walking in front of Jeb, instead of behind him.

Doc and I talked to one another occasionally. The parasite wasn't talking and I already knew everything Jeb was saying, so I just hung in the back with Doc.

We eventually made our way down the southern tunnel, to the hospital. As soon as Jeb explained what this place was and that it was where Doc worked, the parasite stopped dead in its tracks. It looked back and forth between Jeb and Doc. It was frightened again. Only I didn't understand why.

What had happened? Nothing. Jeb was just talking about the hospital. Nothing scary about that.

"No. No, it's okay. Really. Right, Uncle Jeb? It's okay, right?" Jamie asked.

"Sure it is," he answered Jamie, then turned to the girl who was still frozen in terror. "Just showing you my place, kid, that's all."

"What are you talking about?" I asked, a little annoyed. Did I miss something?

"Did you think we brought you here on purpose, for Doc?" Jamie asked the girl. "Because we wouldn't do that. We promised Jared."

"Oh!" I said, understanding. She thought we had tricked her into coming down here. "That wasn't a bad plan. I'm surprised I didn't think of it."

I guess Jamie didn't think my joke was funny because he was scowling at me. "Don't be scared," he told her.

"So this big room here is fitted up with a few cots incase anyone gets sick or hurt. We've been pretty lucky on that count. Doc doesn't have much to work with in an emergency. Your folks threw out all our medicines when they took over things. Hard to get our hands on what we need," Jeb said, smiling.

The parasite nodded.

"What do you know about alien medicine?" Doc asked, curiously.

She just stared back at him, not saying a word.

"Oh, you can talk to Doc. He's a pretty decent guy, all things considered," Jeb told her.

She shook her head quickly.

"She's not giving away any trade secrets," I told Jeb, then I looked at her. "Are you, sweetheart?"

"Manners, Ian," Jeb yelled. I was only kidding around.

"Is it a secret?" Jamie asked her.

She shook her head again. Why wouldn't it just talk?

"I'm not a Healer. I don't know how they—the medications—work. Only that they _do_ work— they heal, rather then merely treating symptoms. No trial and error. Of course the human medicines were discarded." she whispered.

I wasn't expecting her to tell us. The other night, when she spoke to me and Jared, I thought she only did that because Jared was threatening her. But no one was threatening her now.

"Your kind didn't change too much of what we left behind," Jeb stated. "Just the medical stuff, and the spaceships instead of planes. Other than that, life seems to go on just the same as ever... on the surface."

"We come to experience, not to change. Health takes priority over that philosophy, though," she whispered, but then snapped her mouth shut, seeming to have realized she said something wrong.

What she said wasn't wrong, I guess. I mean, they _did_ change everything when they came here. But maybe they hadn't meant to. I don't know what they thought was going to happen. You can't just go stealing a species world away from them and not expect to change things.

Jeb finished up the tour quickly and we headed back towards the main room. It was a long walk, made longer since no one was speaking. Everyone was too distracted by what the girl had told us to make conversation.

I had never actually talked to a parasite before. It was different then I would have expected. They all seemed so nice, that was what made them scary. It was like the Stepford Wives. But this girl, she wasn't scary. She was... nice, but not overly so. She seemed almost... human.

"Show's over," Jeb said as we entered the main room. "Go do something useful."

He was clearly talking to me and Doc. I rolled my eyes. Jeb really wanted to get us away from the girl. I wasn't going to give him any trouble, though, so I headed back off towards the kitchen.

I went to work in the fields. We were irrigating. It took almost all day. By the time we were finished I was exhausted. When I got to the kitchen it was already full. Everyone there was complaining about the girl.

"I can't believe he's letting it stay in Jared's room. Isn't that terrible? I can't even sleep in my own room tonight!" Paige said, as I made my way over to the counter next to her. Andy had gone out with Jared and Kyle on the raid, so she was already on edge, and it seemed the parasite getting it's own room wasn't helping things.

"I didn't know Jeb was letting her stay in one of the rooms," I said. I didn't know how I felt about that. She wasn't a Seeker, no, and she seemed nice enough, but there was just something about sleeping that close to a parasite that was unsettling.

"He's got it in there right now. I feel like I should go get my things," she cringed like she thought somehow her stuff would become infected or something, "but I don't want to be anywhere near that thing. I don't how you managed to go on a tour with it before," she shook her head.

Taking the tour with it hadn't been that bad. She only spoke the one time. She wasn't threatening, not at all. It was almost...

"Jared's going to be furious when he gets back. I know I would be if a parasite was sleeping in my bed," she shuddered at the thought. I almost did, too.

"Where are you going to sleep?" she asked, but didn't wait for me to respond. "I'm going to cram in with Lily and Trudy."

"I don't know, I guess I'll see if I can stay with Wes," I told her. I don't why, but it just felt like the right thing to do, at the time. The way she was looking at me, it made me feel guilty for believing the parasite. Made me feel like I was somehow betraying my friends. ...Siding with the enemy.

I slept on an extra mattress in Wes' room that night. It was comfortable enough, but there was nothing like sleeping in your own bed at night.

When I woke the next morning, I made a decision. I was going to help Jeb. Doc had guarded the girl last night. Doc always did the right thing. It wasn't betrayal to help another human, even if that human was protecting an alien.

After breakfast, I walked out into the big main room. I saw Jeb coming out of the tunnel that led to the sleeping quarters, the parasite close at his heels.

"Hey, Jeb," I smiled. "Whatcha up to?"

"Turning the soil in the east field," he replied.

"Want some help?" I was going to help him keep an eye on her even if he told me to get lost.

But he didn't tell me to get lost. "Ought to make yourself useful," he muttered.

I began following them, walking behind the girl. When we passed Wes, I had to laugh at his expression. He looked shocked, but I thought that it was more aimed at me than the girl. I don't think anyone would've expected me to be helping Jeb. I had been one of the ones that tried to kill her initially. I think they thought that with Jared gone, I would try again.

"Hey, Doc," I called as we passed him.

"Ian," he nodded. He was working in the kitchen today from the looks of the big wad of dough in his hands. "Morning, Jeb. Morning, Wanda."

It took me a moment to realize he was talking to the girl.

"Morning," Jeb said in return, while the girl just nodded.

"See ya around," Doc said as he turned and headed for the kitchen.

"Wanda, huh?" I asked. I wondered why he had chosen that name. I was pretty sure she hadn't picked it.

"My idea. Suits her, I think," he told me.

"Interesting," I said.

_What a name to be stuck with_, I laughed to myself.

When we got to the eastern field I saw, first hand, what she was going through. The moment we stepped into the room I could _feel_ the stares, more like glares really, and they weren't even directed at me.

Jeb went to get tools for us. We had to plow the earth to get it ready to be seeded. I stood behind her, her body was tense. She was afraid.

When Jeb came back he handed her the shovel and then gave me the pick. I could see her eyeing the sharp metal tool in my hand. She looked like she was about to bolt any second, but she stayed where she was.

We worked in an area in the back corner of the field. I plowed the earth in front and she shoveled the clumps out of the way. Jeb brought up the rear, breaking up the clumps into useable dirt.

It was hot, the cave was baking, and I was sweating. I took my shirt off and continued working. I focused my hardest on breaking up the ground in front of me, but it wasn't easy when I could feel her looking at me. She was still afraid of me. Did she think I'd hit her with the pick in my hands?

She must be terrified. Everyone here hated her. She was flinching anytime someone moved. I felt so bad for her, but I couldn't do anything about it. I was already doing all I could by staying close and keeping an eye out for her.

She began helping Jeb chop up the dirt clumps. It seemed to distract her, she wasn't flinching as frequently. Heidi was bring water around to everyone, but skipped our group in the back. I took it upon myself to bring back water for the three of us.

When we finished I pulled the pick over my head, stretching my arms. My joints popped from the hard work. Everyone else had finished up their sections, too.

"Good work. We'll seed and water tomorrow," Jeb said to everyone. The others were chatting quietly now, as they left the room.

I looked over at the girl, Wanda, Jeb had called her. She was looking around the room, the shovel still in her right hand. I reached out to take it from her and she looked down at my hand for a second before giving it to me.

I placed our tools in the pile against the wall on my way out. "See you tomorrow, Wanda," I called from the exit.

She had no idea how often she was going to see me. It made me laugh. I had tried to kill her and now I was going to be her own personal bodyguard.


	6. Second Impressions

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Thanks for all the great reviews! Hope you enjoy this chapter. Review :)**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 6_

I left the eastern field and headed toward my room to pick up some clean clothes to change into. I needed to get cleaned up, badly.

It didn't take long to get to my room and pick out some clothes. I took one look at the small pile of clothing on the shelf next to my bed, and shook my head.

We didn't have a lot of clothing options down here in the caves. Everything we had was old and dirty and whenever we did get new clothes, they tended to get beat up rather quickly. The tags in the shirts said 'machine wash in warm water' not 'scrub with nasty, acidic soap in a sulfurous hot spring'.

I grabbed a brown t-shirt and a pair of jeans and went to the bathing room. When I got there, the group that had formed looked upset about something. They weren't in the normal line that would have formed, but were in more of a circle, whispering about something. I took one look at Jeb, leaning against the wall, rifle strapped on his shoulder, and knew why no one was in line.

The girl was taking a bath and no one wanted to go in after her. What were they, like, four years old? Did they think they'd get cooties or something?

Ignoring the stares I received, I walked over and waited in line. She might be a parasite, but her body was human. It wasn't like she was contagious or something. It wasn't a disease you could catch. You had to be implanted with one of _them_.

Once everyone realized that they'd eventually have to use the bathing room again, they all fell into line behind me. I could just make out the smirk that was hidden under Jeb's beard.

The others were following my lead, and I guess that's what Jeb wanted. Maybe he thought if he could get one person to accept her, the rest would eventually fall in line. It wasn't a bad plan, I just hoped it worked sooner rather than later.

About ten minutes later, the girl came out of the dark bathing room. She was wearing a plaid shirt with the arms cut off and a pair of old sweat shorts, but she didn't look bad in them. Quite the opposite, actually, she was... pretty.

This was the first time I had been able to see what she really looked like. Before she had been too dirty, but now, with the dirt washed from her hair and face, I could really see her.

She had short brown hair, it hung almost to her shoulders. Her skin was a smooth tan, like Jamie's. She looked a lot like the kid, actually. Her eyes were the same chocolate brown that his were, only now there was a shimmer of silver in them, too.

As I looked at her eyes, I realized that the silver in them wasn't as disgusting to me as I would of thought. Every time I had been close enough to one of _them_ to see the reflective glimmer, it made me cringe. That was the only real way to tell that it wasn't human. But this time I didn't feel that way. I knew she wasn't human, I already knew what she was.

The difference a bath can make was shocking. She went from being a parasite pet of Jeb's to looking like... like a woman. A very pretty woman. Somehow that made the guilt come back, again.

She quietly made her way over to Jeb. He was laughing at her because of the way she was holding the soap. She handed it to him and then her eyes were on me. Those silver eyes looked right into mine for a second.

"You look better," I said. My voice sounded shocked, I think. I'm not sure if it was because she looked so much different now, or if it was because of the way she was looking at me.

The bruises on her neck looked even worse now that she had washed the dirt off. They were beginning to fade, and I wished they would hurry up. I hated seeing them there.

I wasn't thinking, if I was, I probably wouldn't have done it, but I reached my hand out to touch the place where the shape of my hands were outlining her throat.

I don't know what I was planning on doing, maybe I was just going to brush my fingers across the purple skin. But when she flinched away from me, I snapped back into reality. This girl hated me, she was terrified of me. I had hurt her. Of course she didn't want me touching her.

"Sorry about that," I apologized. I wish I had had the guts to tell her just how sorry I really was, but the words wouldn't come. It didn't matter anyway, she walked away, out of the river room, and Jeb followed her.

Watching her walk away made the guilt triple, and there was something else, too. I didn't want her to be afraid of me. I didn't know why I cared what she thought of me, but I did. I guess, I didn't want people to think of me as a killer, not even a parasite.

I washed up quickly, scrubbing my clothes clean of the purple cave dirt. The soap stung my skin and I chuckled silently. It reminded me of the way the girl was carrying the soap. The way she had it held in between two fingers, so it wouldn't sting as badly.

The next day was the same. Jeb, Wanda and I planted and irrigated the eastern field. I was supposed to be making soap, but I traded with Travis. He said he didn't want to work with the parasite, but I thought that was just being stupid. Why would anyone willingly take soap duty? I'd work with twenty parasites if it would get me out of making that damn soap.

The third day, Jeb had her working in the kitchen. I had other chores to get done, none of which I could trade with any of the women working in the kitchen. I knew Jeb was with her, though, so I wasn't too worried for her. He had the gun, but I didn't think that Trudy or Paige or Lucina would actually hurt Wanda. They'd just ignore her, at the very worst.

The day after that, we had to clean the mirrors, hung high in the cave ceiling. It wasn't something we had to do too often, but whenever the dirt started to impede the flow of light in the room Jeb had us clean them.

I climbed the old wooden ladder while Wanda and Jeb held it steady. It couldn't have been easy for them, _I_ had trouble keeping these ladders steady when Kyle was on them. I could only imagine how difficult it was for her. At least Kyle and I were around the same weight, he was a few pounds heavier, but Wanda was less then half my weight.

When we were finished and walking toward the kitchen, Wanda froze, gasping loudly. I turned to see what was wrong, but nothing was. No one was anywhere near her, besides Jeb and myself.

I stared at her, trying to figure out what had scared her, but she was just staring at Jeb. Her eyes were wide, like he had done something she couldn't believe.

After a few seconds, though, she shook her head and started walking again. She was always getting scared of things, but this time I couldn't figure out what had frightened her.

"What was that about?" I asked Jeb. Wanda didn't talk to me, she hadn't spoken to me since the night in the storage area, but even then she was talking more to Jared.

"Beats me," Jeb answered.

When we walked into the kitchen, everyone was chatting over their food. They all continued eating and talking as we found a seat, none of them noticing, or maybe they were just ignoring, that we were here.

Wanda and I walked over to the counter while Jeb went to get us something to eat. Paige was leaning against the counter to my left, by herself, so I turned to speak to her.

"How are things going? How are you holding up with Andy gone?"

"I'd be fine if I weren't so worried," she said, biting her lip. She always hated it when Andy went out on raids.

"He'll be home soon. Jared always brings everyone home. He's got a real talent. We've had no accidents, no problems since he showed up. Andy will be fine," I assured her, patting her on the shoulder. She nodded and went back to her soup.

Jeb came back then and handed me a tray of food. He sat on the other side of Wanda, smiling as he looked around the room. No one paid any attention to the alien girl seated next to us.

"Things are settling down," I said to him.

"Knew they would. We're all reasonable folks here."

"That's true, at the moment. My brother's not around," I laughed. If Kyle were here, he would most definitely be causing a scene right about now.

"Exactly," Jeb smiled.

And things did calm down. A lot. Jeb started to send her around by herself, had her doing little errands for him. It was good to get her out there by herself every now and then, let people get used to seeing her around. The only time I had a problem with it was when he tried to send her to Doc's by herself.

"Wanda, you remember your way to the hospital? I need ya to take a message to Doc for me." Jeb asked. He was watering the crops in the main field.

"Yes," Wanda answered. She looked terrified. I don't think she was comfortable with Doc or the hospital, yet.

"Good," Jeb smiled, "Go and tell Doc that I need him to take inventory of his supplies. I want to know how quickly we're using 'em up."

"Okay," she whispered and began to walk away.

"I'll go with you," I said, hurrying after her.

She turned and looked at me for a moment and then looked at Jeb. Seeing if he thought it was alright. He nodded at us and continued working.

She looked back at me and then walked to the entrance of the southern tunnel. It was a long walk, she didn't say anything and neither did I. I knew she was still afraid of me and, since this was the first time we had ever really been alone, I didn't want to freak her out more than necessary.

We eventually made it to Doc's and she gave him the message. Doc's books were open on his desk and there were sketches strewn all over. He was planning out more of his experiments. She didn't need to see that, she was scared out of her mind half the time already. What would she do if she saw one of those sketches?

Doc looked at me pointedly. He knew why I was with her, he was protecting her, too. He understood that I still didn't trust the others as much as Jeb did. I shifted my eyes back to the mess of papers covering his desk and he seemed to understand. He quickly thanked Wanda and sent us on our way.

We walked for a minute or two before she spoke to me.

"Ian?"

I was shocked that she was talking to me. This was the first time she had spoken _directly to_ me. "Yes?" I said.

"Why haven't you killed me yet?"

Her question caught me off guard. "That's direct."

"You could, you know. Jeb might be annoyed, but I don't think he'd shoot you," she said. It sounded like she was letting me know that I could get away with it. Like she was giving me permission.

"I know," I told her. It was true, I _could_ kill her and Jeb _wouldn't_ shoot me. But I didn't _want_ to kill her. I wasn't sure that I wanted to have this conversation with her, though. I had talked about it with Jeb and Doc, but they both had wild ideas about her that I just couldn't believe.

Jeb and Doc had told me their theory about how the human girl, Melanie, was still inside the body. Sharing it with Wanda. I hadn't believed any of it, though. They were just crazy theories.

She probably should know that I didn't want to hurt her, it would make protecting her easier.

"It doesn't seem fair. I've been thinking about it a lot, and I can't see how killing you would make anything right. It would be like executing a private for a general's war crimes," I admitted. "Now, I don't buy into all of Jeb's crazy theories―it would be nice to believe, sure, but just because you want something to be true doesn't make it that way. Whether he's right or wrong, though, you don't seem to mean us any harm."

I thought about how she acted around Jamie. She was always so concerned for him. She seemed to want to protect him the same way she protected Jared from Kyle that first night.

"I have to admit, you seem honestly fond of that boy. It's very strange to watch. Anyway, as long as you don't put us in danger, it seems... _cruel_ to kill you. What's one more misfit in this place?"

She thought about that for a few minutes, as we walked along. I couldn't help but peek at her from the corner of my eye. Did I offend her? I didn't think I said anything wrong, I was just trying to explain how I felt.

"If you don't want to kill me, then why did you come with me today?" she finally asked.

Now, it was my turn to think about what she had said. I wasn't sure if I should tell her the truth. I didn't want to scare her. But she was already scared, she thought I had come with her today to kill her. She deserved the truth.

"I'm not sure that..." I started again, "Jeb thinks things have calmed down, but I'm not completely sure about that. They're are still a few people..." I trailed off. I couldn't say it to her, tell her they still wanted to murder her. "Anyway, Doc and I have been trying to keep an eye on you when we can. Just in case. Sending you down the south tunnel seemed like pushing your luck, to me. But that's what Jeb does best―he pushes luck as far as it will go."

"You... you and Doc are trying to _protect_ me?" she sounded shocked. Of course she was shocked. Why would she think I would protect her after the way I'd treated her?

"Strange world, isn't it?" I smirked.

It took her a few seconds to answer. Still reeling from the bomb shell I'd just dropped on her, I suppose.

"The strangest," she said.

We walked the rest of the way back in silence. I couldn't understand why she had willingly gone with me if she thought I was going to kill her. I felt better, though. The guilt I had felt, finally, seemed to ease a little. She knew how I felt now. She knew I was trying to help her.

Over the next couple of weeks, things became easier. Either Jeb, Jamie, Doc, or I always worked with Wanda. Jeb and Jamie always ate with her, unless Jamie was in school. And I always sat near them. She still didn't speak to me much, I think she was still uncertain about my motives. But whether she believed me or not, she never complained about me hanging around. She would get used to me eventually, she'd realize that I meant her no harm.

Jeb wanted Wanda to teach us about the universe. He had been pestering her for a while now. She had refused, so he asked Doc and I to get her talking. One day, during dinner, Jeb finally got his way.

Jamie and Wanda were sitting on the counter about a foot away from me. Doc walked over to play his part in Jeb's scheme, and I turned around to join their conversation.

He started asking her questions about the different species that the parasites had come across. At first, she was a little resistant. She had Jamie tell Doc about one of the planets. It had Bears and ice cities, it sounded like something out of a fairytale.

Then Doc asked her how they were able to learn so much about humans. She stumbled over her answer.

"They... they take samples."

"Alien abductions," I smiled. Her eyes flickered to my face, but she ignored my comment. She was _trying_ to make it sound less offensive to us.

"Makes sense," Doc said. He continued his questioning, asking her about her home planet, the one her species started out on.

She told us about how her species had left their home world and explored farther into the universe. She knew the Souls whole history. If someone asked me about human history, I don't think I would have been able to answer so thoroughly.

"You speak of it almost as if you were there," I said, "How long ago did this happen?"

"After the dinosaurs lived here, but before you did," she answered. "I was not there, but I remember some of what my mother's mother's mother remembered of it."

Was it possible that she _could_ have been there? What she was talking about would have happened tens of thousands of years ago.

I leaned closer to her, staring into her silver eyes, extremely interested in her answer. "How old are _you_?"

"I don't know in Earth years."

"An estimate?"

I was not expecting the answer she gave me.

"Thousands of years, maybe. I lose track of the years spent in hibernation," she answered.

I leaned back, my eyes wide. The woman sitting in front of me was no more than twenty years old, but that was just her body. That was Melanie, not _Wanda_. Wanda was... _thousands_ of years old?

It was very strange to talk to someone who had lived so long. I suddenly felt very insignificant next to her. She must know so much. I had never thought about the Souls like that before. I had never seen them as anything but monsters, but Wanda had lived for so long before she even came here. She wasn't always the alien who stole Melanie's body, she was her own being, had a life of her own. And now she was stuck down in these caves with a bunch of humans who were trying to kill her.

It made me wonder if she would rather be somewhere else? She must want to be anywhere but here. I didn't like knowing that I was one of the reasons she would want to leave our group.

"Wow, that's old," Jamie murmured.

"But in a very real sense, I'm younger than you," she told him. "Not even a year old. I feel like a child all the time."

"What's the aging process for your kind? The natural life span?" Doc asked.

"We don't have one. As long as we have a healthy host body, we can live forever," she said.

I felt my mouth begin to open, but I quickly snapped it shut. She could live forever. As long as she had a healthy host. The parasites were never going to die out. They would never leave this planet. They'd breed more bodies and when they needed to, they'd trade in their host for a younger model.

Everyone else in the room was thinking the same thing I was, because I heard the loud murmur that echoed through the cave.

"Beautiful," Sharon said, her tone angrier than the others. She was facing the other direction, refusing to look at any of us.

"I'm not hungry anymore," Wanda whispered to Jamie, hopping down off the counter. The group's reaction upset her. She didn't like angering people, and Sharon's comment, mixed with the angry murmurs, was too much for her.

It made me mad, seeing her run away from them like that. Doc asked the question and all she did was answer it truthfully. Why should they be mad at that? It wasn't Wanda's fault that the parasites didn't die. It wasn't her fault that they had come in the first place. She shouldn't have to leave, her dinner lying unfinished on the counter, just because they didn't want to hear the truth.

She had as much a right as them to be here, she worked harder than all of us combined. What right did they have to make her feel bad about who she was?

Jamie got up to follow her, but I stopped him. "Wait," I said.

He turned and looked at me. We hadn't really spoken much since I started helping out with Wanda, but we did spend enough time around each other that I knew he wasn't mad at me anymore.

"Yeah? I need to go find Wanda," he said, the slightest trace of anxiety on his face as his eyes moved between my face and the exit.

"Here," I said, handing him Wanda's unfinished roll, "Give this to her."

Jamie smiled at me and grabbed the roll.

"Tell Wanda I want to hear the rest of that story tomorrow. We'll be in the fields together, plenty of time for more questions," I grinned as he made his way to the exit.

He turned around, a huge smile on his face now. "I'll let her know!" he called back, before disappearing down the hall.

And I did ask her questions the next day while we weeded the spinach in the main field. She hated it. Said something about my questions distracting her from her chores. Eventually she made a deal with us, she would teach at night, after dinner, and we wouldn't ask her questions during the day. We would meet in the kitchen. Wanda would bake bread while she told us anything we wanted to know about the other planets.

It was like she had to be doing something, she couldn't just sit still, not even for five minutes. I'd never met anyone that worked as hard as Wanda. It was like she thought she needed to work harder than the rest of us just to fit in.

Everyone was starting to feel more comfortable around Wanda. Some of the others even spoke to her now. Trudy and Lily, especially. I had always liked them, they were good people. They could see passed their prejudices, they could see that Wanda wasn't a danger to us.

We were all sitting in the kitchen one night, it had been four weeks since Wanda was introduced into our community. She was baking, of course, and Jamie was telling everyone about the Dolphins. They were a species of dragonfly-like creatures that the Souls had recently discovered. Everyone was interested in them because we all felt bad for the poor creatures, we knew what they were going through.

I was sitting on the counter next to the stove. I needed to be close to her... just incase. I didn't think anyone here would try anything, but I wasn't taking chances with her life. She deserved better than that.

There was a loud echo through the caves. Something was going on outside the kitchen.

The raiders. They were back.

Jeb and Doc hadn't come to Wanda's class tonight. They were welcoming Jared and Kyle and all of the others home, I knew it.

"Hey!" Jamie shouted, running from the room, apparently he figured it out, too. Only he was happy to have them home, he wasn't scared to death like I was.

_Wanda_. They would try to hurt her. Kyle would most definitely try to... kill her.

I couldn't let them.

I turned to look at Wanda, she turned around to see Jamie running out to meet the returning raiders.

She didn't realize what it meant, the noises outside, Jamie running to meet the others. She started after him.

"Wait. He'll be back. Tell us more about the Dolphins," I said, as I reached out and touched her wrist.

She flinched away. I hated it when she did that. I hated that she was still afraid of me. But I understood, how could she not be afraid of me? I couldn't blame her for hating me, I hated myself.

"What's going on out there?" she asked me.

"Who knows? Maybe Jeb..." I started, but then trailed off. I couldn't lie to her, but I couldn't tell her the truth, either. So instead, I just shrugged.

She shrugged, too, and went back to talking about the Dolphins. I wasn't really listening to what she was saying, though. I was too busy staring at the cave entrance, waiting for the fight that was coming.

Hopefully, Jeb would have the gun. I couldn't take Jared _and_ Kyle by myself, let alone Brandt, Aaron and Andy.

When the raiders hit the doorway, they froze. Jared was in the front, Jamie hanging onto his arm, with Jeb standing behind them. The rest were all following behind Jared. Wanda was still talking about grandparents or something. They were all staring at her, murder in their eyes.

Then Wanda stopped talking. She was looking right at Jared.

"Here we go," I muttered to myself.

This wasn't going to be good. But I wouldn't let them hurt her. I'd figure something out. This innocent girl didn't deserve what was coming for her.


	7. Fighting

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Okay, so for everyone who has read my other stories, this chapter might look a little familiar. I've decided to tie all of my stories together. If you've read What the Hell, People? and Just Like That than you'll already know some of what's happening in this chapter. If you haven't than it's not necessary to read them, but it will give you more insight into what's going on.**

**Sorry. I know this chapter is mostly dialogue from the book. It was just one of those chapters where it was hard to avoid. Don't worry though. Next chapter's all Ian and Wanda! Let me know what you guys think. Review :)**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 7_

Jared's hand curled into a fist and he took a step forward. "What is the meaning of this, Jeb?"

"Wanda is teaching us all about the universe," Jamie explained. He was excited. He didn't see the hate in Jared's eyes.

"_Wanda?_" Jared snarled. The men standing behind him hissed at the name as well.

"Andy!" I heard Paige screech as she ran across the crowded room. She wasn't exactly watching where she was going and tripped over Wes, but Andy caught her before she could fall.

Everyone in the kitchen began welcoming the raiders home. They all looked guilty, guilty for being caught consorting with a parasite.

Wanda must be so scared. Jared and Jeb were the only ones who had protected her. And now Jared looked like he wanted to kill someone because she was still alive. Jeb had left the decision to him, maybe that someone Jared was going to kill was her.

_No, never. I'll never let that happen_, I swore.

"It's going to be okay, Wanda," I told her, keeping my eyes on the raiders. She was staring at me. I hoped she knew that I would protect her. I didn't want her to be afraid for her life, even if I was.

"What the hell, people?" Kyle pushed his way around the crowd and headed straight towards Wanda. "You're letting it tell you its lies? Have you all gone crazy? Or did it lead the Seekers here? Are you _all_ parasites now?"

I hopped down off the counter and placed myself in front of Wanda. If Kyle or anyone else wanted to hurt her they'd have to go through me first.

"Things changed while you were gone, brother," I told him, my voice flat, serious.

He stopped moving and his mouth flew open. "Did the Seekers come then, Ian?"

He was such an idiot. He knew very well the Seekers hadn't come. I bet he thought that I would've killed her by now. That's why he was so shocked. He thought I could...

He didn't know me at all.

"She's not a danger to us," I said. I knew I couldn't convince Kyle, but maybe I could get someone to listen. Maybe Jared...

Kyle gritted his teeth and reached into his pocket.

"Don't get in his way, Ian," Wanda blurted out.

I wanted to turn around and look at her. She sounded so frightened, like the way she did that first night, when she though we might hurt Jared. Only this time it was me she was concerned for.

I wanted to tell her it was alright, but I couldn't, not with Kyle this close. If I let down my guard he might try something.

Kyle pulled a flashlight from his pocket and I knew what he was going to do. He knew it was me, shining the light in my eyes and checking was just him being dramatic.

"So, what, then? You're not a parasite. How did it get to you?" he asked.

"Calm down, and we'll tell you all about it."

"No," Jared said. He had been standing by the entrance, but now was slowly making he way through the crowd. Jamie still clinging to him.

The kid looked confused. He didn't understand what was going on. He thought everything was great, everyone was back home. He didn't see what the problem was.

"I don't think anyone needs to calm down. Jeb," Jared said, "give me the gun."

My stomach churned. I didn't know what to do. The gun I had wanted before was now my worst enemy. Jared was going to shoot her.

"Don't happen to have it on me," Jeb told him.

_Thank you, Jeb_. I was beginning to feel like I was the only one trying to protect her. Sure, some of the others―Lily, Wes, Trudy, Walter―they didn't look like they liked the idea of Wanda being killed, but they weren't doing anything to stop it.

Jared looked at Jeb for a moment, before turning back towards Wanda. "Fine. It will be slower this way, though. It would be more humane if you were to find that gun fast."

"Please, Jared, let's talk," I said, moving to put myself in front of Wanda again.

"I think there's been too much talk. Jeb left this up to me and I've made my decision."

Jeb cleared his throat and Jared spun to look at him.

"What?" Jared asked. "You made the rule, Jeb."

Jeb _did_ say it was Jared's decision. And Jeb didn't usually go back on his rules.

"Well, now, that's true," Jeb said.

Jared turned back around. He looked at Wanda, such hatred in his eyes, before looking at me. "Ian," he growled, "get out of my way."

"Well, well, hold on a sec," Jeb said. "If you recall, the rule was that whoever the body belonged to got to make the decision."

"And?" Jared said through gritted teeth.

"Seems to me like there's someone here with a claim just as strong as yours. Mebbe stronger."

It took Jared a few seconds to understand what Jeb was saying. When he finally figured it out he looked down at Jamie, who looked horrified. I guess he finally understood what was happening.

"You can't, Jared. You wouldn't. Wanda's good. She's my friend! And Mel! What about Mel? You can't kill Mel! Please! You have to ―" Jamie choked on his words. I though he was going to break out into tears at any moment.

"So, you can see that Jamie's not in agreement. I figure he's got as much say as you do," Jeb said. His voice was just as calm as ever.

Jared stared at Jamie for a while before answering. "How could you let this happen, Jeb?" was all he said.

"There is a need for some talk. Why don't you take a breather first, though? Maybe you'll feel more up to conversation after a bath."

No one spoke for another minute or so. Jared stared at Jeb, in shock, no doubt, before finally turning to leave.

"Kyle," Jared called over his shoulder, ordering my brother from the room.

Kyle looked at me for a moment, before following Jared out. The contempt on his face would have almost made me feel bad, if he wasn't so wrong in this case.

The rest of the raiders, along with most of the rest of the room, left with them. Only a select few―me, Jeb, Jamie, Trudy, Geoffrey, Heath, Lily, Wes, and Walter―stayed with Wanda.

"Whew! That was close. Nice thinking, Jeb," I said, once the others were gone.

"Inspiration in desperation. But we're not out of the woods yet," Jeb said.

"Don't I know it! You didn't leave the gun anywhere obvious, did you?"

"Nope. I figured this might be comin' on soon."

"That's something, at least."

Wanda walked over to a frightened Jamie and he wrapped his arms around her. "It's okay. It's okay," she tried to comfort him. The lie was very apparent in her voice. She didn't believe it was going to be okay.  
Didn't believe _she_ was going to be okay.

"He won't hurt you. I won't let him," Jamie cried. I knew exactly how he felt. Those were the exact words I wanted to say to her.

I walked over and patted the kid on the back. "Don't agonize over it, kid. You're not in this alone," I told him.

"They're just shocked, that's all," Trudy said. "Once we get a chance to explain, they'll see reason."

Everyone was gathered in a small circle around Wanda and Jamie. They wanted to be there for her.

"See reason? Kyle?" Geoffrey said incredulously.

"We knew this was coming," Jeb said. "Just got to weather it. Storms pass."

"Maybe you ought to find that gun," Lily told Jeb. "Tonight might be a long one. Wanda can stay with Heidi and me ―"

"I think it might be better to keep her somewhere else," I disagreed. She was crazy if she thought I was letting Wanda out of my sight for one minute. "Maybe in the southern tunnels? I'll keep an eye on her. Jeb, wanna lend me a hand?"

"They wouldn't look for her with me." Walter offered. It was nice, but not a good choice. If they did look for her there, he'd be helpless to stop them.

"I'll tag along with you, Ian. There're six of them," Wes said.

"No," Wanda choked out. "No. That's not right. You shouldn't fight with each other. You all belong here. You belong together. Not fighting, not because of me."

We weren't fighting _because_ of her, we were fighting _for_ her. Fighting for her life.

She moved away from Jamie's embrace and took his arms, holding them in front of her to stop him from grabbing her again.

"I just need a minute to myself. I need to be alone," she told him,before turning to Jeb. "And you should have a chance to discuss this without me listening. It's not fair―having to discuss strategy in front of the enemy."

"Now, don't be like that," Jeb said.

"Let me have some time to think, Jeb." She moved away from Jamie as she spoke.

I put my hand on her shoulder and she cringed. I really hated that. She knew I wanted to protect her, we were even friends, sort of, and she still flinched every time I touched her. I didn't blame her, it was my own fault, but still...

"It's not a good idea for you to be wandering around by yourself," I told her.

She leaned in close to me, trying to keep Jamie from overhearing. "Why prolong the inevitable? Will it get easier or harder for him?"

With that she turned and ran from the room. Wanda was fast. I didn't know she was so fast.

"Wanda!" Jamie yelled. Jeb quickly shushed him; people didn't need to know she was out there by herself.

"I'll go find her," I said, walking to the exit.

"You'll do no such thing," Jeb said and I turned to look at him. Was he crazy? We couldn't just leave her out there by herself, what if Kyle or Jared...

"Jeb―" I tried to protest.

"Doc needs help," he said simply. "Trudy and the rest can look."

_Doc needs help_. I felt my muscles tense, my jaw clench. Jared had brought back more test subjects for Doc. More experiments that would come to nothing, but death for the humans and souls alike.

_It never works, they should just give up already_, I thought.

I took a deep breath, trying to come up with an argument, one that would work to get me out of helping Doc. I couldn't come up with anything Jeb would go for. After a minute I finally just walked down to Doc's, Jeb following behind, while the others searched, discreetly, for Wanda.

Jeb wanted to discuss things with Doc. That was one of the reasons he had made me come along. And Doc did need the extra muscle incase one of the bodies the raiders had brought back woke up.

When we walked into the hospital, Doc looked upset. The bodies were lying on the cots and nothing appeared to have happened, so I figured he was worried about Wanda.

"What happened?" Doc asked anxiously when he saw us coming through the entrance.

"Jeb let her run off by herself," I rolled my eyes.

"She asked to be left alone and those boys are probably all passed out in their rooms by now, anyway," Jeb said.

"Doc, you understand, don't you? You know it's too dangerous..." I pleaded but Jeb interrupted me.

"Ian, I know we can't let them hurt her. And they won't. She needs a little time to herself is all," Jeb said.

No. She didn't need time to herself, she needed our protection. How could he be so calm? I was freaking out! Didn't he care about her at all? She considered him her friend, yet he was doing nothing to help her now.

"They aren't unreasonable. I'm sure if we sit down and discuss this like adults we'll be able to..." Doc reasoned.

"Doc, listen to what your saying. 'They aren't unreasonable'? This is Kyle we're talking about!" I said. Kyle was the only one who wouldn't listen. The others might have a hard time with it, at first, but no one was as pig-headed as Kyle.

"We're just gonna have to give 'em a chance to cool down. It's a lot to expect them to deal with. You've had weeks to come to terms with Wanda being here," said Jeb. I began to protest but he stopped me. "And if I remember correctly, you were a little angry that she was here, too."

Why did he have to bring that up? The guilt that I thought was slowly going away came back in that moment, full force.

"Yeah, but..." I tried, but there was nothing I could say to him. It wasn't different with me. I had hated her just like they did. "We can't just leave her out there, unprotected," I finally said.

"She asked to be alone, so that's what she gets. She's not our prisoner. If she wants to sit by herself and think things through, that's her right," Jeb said.

She didn't deserve any of this, it wasn't fair. She could be dead right now. Trudy or Wes or someone could come in any moment saying they'd found her body...

I had the urge to run, go and find her and keep her safe, but I didn't. She was fine. She would be fine. Jeb was right, she needed time. She had just been through a lot, and it wasn't like she trusted me or any of us, really.

_She must be so scared_, I thought. Knowing everyone around you wants you dead. It must be terrible.

I thought about what she had said when she ran away. _Why prolong the inevitable? Will it get easier or harder for him?_ She cared about Jamie so much. Why couldn't Jared see that? She was willing to let them kill her now, just to keep the kid from hurting more.

I sighed, remembering how she leaned in to keep Jamie from hearing. She was so close, I could have just grabbed her and kept her there with me. I could have stopped her. She was so close...

I remembered how she smelled. Her hair... it smelled like baking bread. She smelled good, better than any of the rest of us, who smelled like dirt and sweat.

She wasn't dangerous. How could they think that? She was sweet and kind and sort of funny sometimes, but never on purpose. She was just always doing or saying something that made me want to laugh. How could anyone see her as a threat? She was as innocent as a little kitten.

Kyle was stubborn and would never see passed his hate. I didn't think Jared would, either. Wanda _was_ in his girlfriend's body, after all. They would try to hurt her, if not both, then at least Kyle. I was getting worried again. Would Wanda purposefully seek him out? She _might_, she was always doing things for others. What if she thought she had to do this to protect Jamie? That's what it seemed like she was saying back in the kitchen...

"Jeb, can I please just go check on her?" I pleaded.

"Not right now, Ian. Let her be for a little while," Jeb said, firmly.

"What if she's hurt? What if their..." I began to say, but at that very moment, Kyle came walking into the hospital.

I glared at him, all the anxiety I had been feeling suddenly plummeting to my stomach, twisting it into knots. Why was he here? Had he hurt her? If he hurt her I'd...

"Somethin' we can help you with, Kyle?" Jeb asked.

"No, actually, I was wondering if Doc needed any help?" he said.

I rolled my eyes at him. Like Kyle had ever volunteered to help anyone in his life. I was pretty sure the only reason he did his chores around here was because Jeb had threatened him with the gun.

"Thank you, Kyle. I could use some help. I'm going to get started in one moment," Doc smiled, completely oblivious to the devilish glint in Kyle's eyes. He was up to something.

"No problem," Kyle said, then he turned to me, smiling. I don't know why, but I lost it then. He was planning something, I knew it, and I wasn't going to let him get away with it.

I marched over to him and got right in his face. I _thought_ I was going to scream, but when I spoke it was barely above a whisper.

"Kyle, I know what you're thinking. I won't allow it. You're going to stay away from her."

Kyle looked furious, but instead of screaming like I thought he would, he just laughed. "Sure, whatever, Bro."

"Kyle, I mean it. I'm not going to let you or anyone hurt her," I told him, louder now. He was beginning to piss me off.

"It's not a girl, Ian. It's a freaking alien. A worm, a bug, a parasite. It's..." Jeb cleared his throat, cutting Kyle off mid-sentence.

Jeb looked at us for a few moments before looking at Doc. Doc was standing next to one of the cots that held the unconscious bodies, scalpel in hand.

"Do you boys think you could take this outside? I need my concentration..." Doc asked.

I quickly grabbed Kyle's shoulder, forcing from the room. I wasn't giving up on this discussion just yet.

Once we were in the hall he started ranting. "It's not human, Ian. Do you think it would hesitate to call its little Seeker friends on you if the roles were reversed? If you were in its world?"

He still thought she was a Seeker. How could I convince him, he wasn't going to listen. "She's not a Seeker, Kyle. She won't hurt us! Can't you just give her a chance?"

"You know as well as I do that you can't let your guard down around them for one second! Do you remember what happened with Mom and Dad or do you need me to remind you?"

The hate in his eyes reminded me of that first night when I... I had blamed her for my parent's deaths. I blamed her for my world being taken from me. But it wasn't _her_ fault. She wasn't the one who decided to come here. It wasn't fair to blame her. What he was saying reminded me of myself that first night.

"She had no part in what happened to them!" I growled.

"Maybe not her specifically, but her kind did. They came here with the soul intention of killing us. All of us. They wanted to wipe out all of humanity! And they succeeded!"

"So you want to kill one poor, defenseless girl because her family did something terrible? She had nothing to do with it! It wasn't her who made the decision to come here and end our world," I said, the last part only a whisper. It wasn't her fault. Our fight wasn't with this one girl. She didn't deserve it.

"Ian, why are you doing this?"

I wasn't expecting his question. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know how to explain it exactly. It was just... _wrong_ to try and hurt her.

"She's different. She's not lying. I know it. I'm sure. I can... I can _feel_ it," I muttered.

He didn't say anything, at first. Maybe he was listening. Maybe he would trust me, the way he had years ago, at the start of the invasion. My gut had been right then, maybe he'd believe me now, too.

"Kyle, please, can you just trust me on this?" I pleaded.

"I can't do it, Ian. That thing can't stay here," he said. When he saw I was about to interrupt he started speaking again. "Look, I feel your pain, Bro. I really do. It's been awhile. I get that, but you know this is wrong."

I shook my head. "Kyle, I have no idea what your talking about."

"Ian, it's okay to feel... lonely. But this is _not_ the right girl..."

Suddenly, what he was saying made sense. He thought I... What the hell was wrong with him? How could he think I'd take advantage of someone like that?

"What the hell is wrong with you? That's not what this is about!" I boomed.

"Oh, really? So you've never thought about it? Not at all?"

I ground my teeth together and glared at him. I wasn't going to dignify that with a response.

He smirked at me. "Ian, what your feeling is nothing more that years of pent up..."

"_Shut up_, Kyle!" I yelled, my voice echoing off the cave walls. "Just shut up and keep away from her!"

I turned around and went back into the hospital. I couldn't deal with Kyle anymore. What was he thinking? Why would he think _that_, of all things?

Doc was already working on his second victim. The first one was dead. Silver blood smeared all over the cot.

I felt nauseous. I had wanted to do that to Wanda just a few weeks ago. I couldn't imagine what that must feel like. Doc wasn't very... gentle with the souls inside the human bodies. He cut them and ripped them apart, trying to get them out and leave the human intact. All in vain, of course. The human brain never survived.

Doc was never himself after one of his mutilations. He hated that he couldn't figure it out. Hated that he hurt the human body. But this time he looked worse.

Already, his face was contorted in misery. I could only imagine that was because of Wanda. He liked her, too. _He must be thinking about her_, I thought as he finished up with the second body.

Kyle walked back in then. I didn't bother looking at him.

When Doc had finished stitching the corpse up, he walked over to his desk and grabbed a bottle of brandy from a case that was sitting there. Jared must have brought it back from the raid.

I shook my head as Doc downed a huge gulp of alcohol, then went to grab one of the bodies. I looked at Jeb, who was sitting against the cave wall, before turning to Kyle. He needed to help me get the second body outside. We needed to bury them while it was still dark outside.

As much as I didn't want to work with Kyle right now, he was the only one here. Jeb couldn't drag the body all the way outside and dig a six foot grave. And I didn't think Doc would be leaving the brandy anytime soon. So I, along with Kyle, dragged the bodies outside and buried them.


	8. Friendship

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Thanks to everyone reading this story. I'm glad you're enjoying it!**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 8_

It was morning by the time we had finished burying the bodies. Jared had come out to give me and Kyle a hand, but it still took all night. I was covered in dusty sand and so were Kyle and Jared.

When we came back in through the small entrance in the hospital, Doc was out of it. He was almost finished with his second bottle of brandy. Jeb was sitting against the wall, keeping an eye on him. Sharon wasn't there.

_She should be here_, I thought. _I mean, she is his girlfriend, shouldn't she be here to comfort him, help him_. I could never let someone I love suffer like that. I didn't think I could let anyone suffer like that. Not if I could help them. But I couldn't think about helping Doc right now.

Kyle and Jared were heading for the exit. I followed them out, walking quickly, and soon I was ahead of them in the black tunnel. I had to find Wanda. Who knows what she had gone through last night?

After what felt like an eternity, I was finally in the main plaza. I breathed a sigh of relief as I saw Wanda and Jamie walking around the edge of the garden. She was alright.

"There you are," I said, my voice sounded anxious. I hoped she didn't hear it.

I closed the distance between us with a few long strides and grabbed her under the elbow, hurrying her along. Jared and Kyle weren't too far behind me in the tunnel and would break through into the garden at any moment. I didn't want Wanda there when they did.

"Let's duck in here for a minute." I pulled her into the black tunnel that led to the eastern field, it was close and deserted. And Kyle and Jared had no reason to come this way.

After a few seconds, I could hear them, headed for the bathing room. Wanda must have heard them too, she tensed a little. So did I, the hand I held her with gripped her elbow with a little more force.

". . . don't know why we let him keep trying. When it's over, it's over," Jared muttered.

"He really thought he had it this time. He was so sure.… Oh, well. It will be worth all this if he figures it out someday," Kyle said.

"If." Jared said, voice full of sarcasm. "I guess it's a good thing we found that brandy. Doc's going to blow through the whole crate by nightfall at the rate he's going."

"He'll pass out soon enough. I wish Sharon would…" And then they were gone. Too far away to hear anymore.

We stayed in the dark a few minutes more, Wanda, Jamie, and me. I realized I was still holding her arm and let her go. She didn't want me touching her any more than was necessary.

"Jared promised," Jamie said. I guess they had spoken last night. Well, whether he promised or not, I wasn't convinced. But I wasn't going to argue with the kid about it, and I didn't want to scare Wanda, so I let it go.

"Yeah, but Kyle didn't," I said, walking back out into the bright cave.

I turned around to look at Wanda and noticed she had a crate of dishes in her hands. _Of course she would, she's always trying to help out_, I thought.

"No dishes now," I told her. "Let's give them a chance to clean up and move on."

She looked towards the tunnel that led to the river room, the one Jared and Kyle had just gone down. For the first time today, I saw the right side of her face. There was a huge gash on her cheek, jaw to cheek bone. It was caked in blood and dirt and gravel.

A growl ripped up from my chest. Jared must have done that before he came outside. If Kyle had found her she'd be dead right now.

Wanda turned to look at me. She looked scared. My face softened at the fear in her eyes, I hadn't meant to scare her. I reached out to her. I just wanted to turn her head, to get a better look at her wound. I wanted to make sure she was alright. But she flinched away from me again and I dropped my hand.

"That makes me so sick. And worse, knowing that if I hadn't stayed behind, I might have been the one to do it.…" I couldn't think about it.

"It's nothing, Ian." She shook her head.

"I don't agree with _that_." It _was_ something. Jared had beaten the crap out of her once again, and she wasn't even complaining. She didn't want anyone to make a big deal out of it. She shouldn't think it was okay for him to beat up on her like that. It wasn't. I don't care what species she is, she's not a worthless piece of trash. She deserves better than that.

"You probably ought to get to school. It's better that we get everything back to normal as soon as possible," I said, turning to Jamie.

"Sharon will be a _nightmare_ today," he groaned, looking pleadingly at me.

"Time to take one for the team, kid. I don't envy you," I said, smiling.

"Keep an eye on Wanda," he told me.

"Will do." Like I needed to be told.

Jamie walked off, looking back at us every now and then.

"Here, give me those," I said, pulling the dishes from Wanda's hands.

"They weren't too heavy for me," she muttered.

I grinned at her. "I feel silly standing here with my arms empty while you lug these around. Chalk it up to gallantry. C'mon―let's go relax somewhere out of the way until the coast is clear."

I turned and headed down the eastern tunnel, to the cornfield. She followed silently behind me. I figured it was a good enough place as any to hide her. And it was nicer than hiding in some dark hole somewhere. The field was bright, and sitting there in the dirt, you could almost pretend you were outside with the sun shining down on you.

I walked out into the middle of the field and sat there. Wanda sat next to me, crossing her legs in front of her.

"Well, this is out of the way. But shouldn't we be working?" she asked.

"You work too hard, Wanda. You're the only one who never takes a day off."

"It gives me something to do," she mumbled.

"Everyone is taking a break today, so you might as well."

She looked at me for a second and then said, "You look like you've been working."

I forgot that I was filthy. She wasn't stupid, she'd guess that I was hiding something, but I couldn't tell her the truth. I couldn't lie to her either, though, so instead I just avoided the subject. "But I'm resting now."

"Jamie won't tell me what's going on," she frowned.

"No. And neither will I." I felt bad for not telling her, though. But she shouldn't have to know about those poor people we buried this morning.

I sighed. "It's nothing you want to know anyway."

She stared at the dirt, imagining. She looked like she was going to be sick.

"It's not really fair, seeing as I won't answer your question, but do you mind if I ask you one?" I said.

"Go ahead," she told me, still looking at the ground.

I didn't know how to ask her. I stared at my dirt covered fingers, trying to decide how to say it.

"I know you're not a liar. I know that now. I'll believe you, whatever your answer is." I paused. "I didn't buy Jeb's story before, but he and Doc are pretty convinced.…" I looked up at her then. "Wanda? Is she still in there with you? The girl whose body you wear?"

"Yes. Melanie is still here."

I nodded slowly. "What is it like? For you? For her?" Maybe it was none of my of my business, but I was curious.

"It's… frustrating, for us both. At first I would have given anything to have her disappear the way she should have. But now I… I've gotten used to her." She smiled. "Sometimes it's nice to have the company. It's harder for her. She's like a prisoner in many ways. Locked away in my head. She prefers that captivity to disappearing, though."

"I didn't know there was a choice," I told her.

"There wasn't in the beginning. It wasn't until your kind discovered what was happening that any resistance started. That seems to be the key―knowing what's going to happen. The humans who were taken by surprise didn't fight back."

It was just morbid curiosity, but I had to ask. "So if I were caught?"

"I doubt you would disappear," she said, her eyes boring into mine. "Things have changed, though. When they catch full-grown humans now, they don't offer them as hosts. Too many problems." She smiled a little. "Problems like _me_. Going soft, getting sympathetic to my host, losing my way…"

So if we were caught, we wouldn't be used as hosts. Would they kill us, then? What else could they do with us? Would they try to get information from us? Or would they just shoot us?

"What would they do with me, then, if they caught me now?" I asked after a while.

"They'd still do an insertion, I think. Trying to get information. Probably they'd put a Seeker in you."

I shuddered. The thought of a Seeker inside of me, using my body to kill all of my friends, it sickened me.

"But they wouldn't keep you as a host. Whether they found the information or not, you would be… discarded." She had a hard time saying the last word. Of course she would, she wasn't violent. The idea of killing another living being must have appalled her.

"And if they caught _you_?" I asked. As I stared into her eyes, I couldn't stop myself. I needed to know what would happen to her. If the Seekers came, found her here... with _us_, would she be punished? ..._Killed_?

"If they realized who I was… if anyone is still looking for me…" She shuddered at the thought of someone looking for her. "They would take me out and put me in another host. Someone young, tractable. They would hope that I would be able to be myself again. Maybe they would ship me off-planet―get me away from the bad influences."

"Would you be yourself again?"

She looked up into my eyes then. "I _am_ myself. I haven't lost myself to Melanie. I would feel the same as I do now, even as a Bear or a Flower," she said, a fierceness in her voice I had never heard there before.

"They wouldn't _discard_ you?" I asked, using her term.

"Not a soul. We have no capital punishment for our kind. Or any punishment, really. Whatever they did, it would be to save me. I used to think there was no need for any other way, but now I have myself as proof against that theory. It would probably be right to discard me. I'm a traitor, aren't I?"

She looked sad. She didn't like thinking she had betrayed her kind. I racked my brain, trying to think of a way to comfort her. A way to make being here with us less depressing to her. She had enough to deal with without having to feel like a traitor.

"More of an expatriate, I'd say. You haven't turned on them; you've just left their society," I said after a few seconds.

She didn't say anything and we sat in silence for a couple of minutes.

I stared at the wound on her face. It was horrible. Big and red; she would have a nasty scar there. It must have hurt, but she didn't complain. I sighed and she jumped a little. It made me feel bad, she frightened so easily.

_Of course she frightens easily. She's surrounded by a bunch of violent aliens that keep trying to kill her_, I thought.

"When Doc sobers up, we'll get him to take a look at your face," I said, reaching out to touch her chin. She didn't flinch this time, allowing me to turn her head so I could get a good look at the gash on her cheek.

"It's not important. I'm sure it looks worse than it is," she said.

"I hope so―it looks awful." I dropped my hand from her chin and stretched. "I suppose we've hidden long enough that Kyle's clean and unconscious. Want some help with the dishes?"

She smiled weakly and got to her feet.

I carried the dishes down to the river room. When she tried to wash them in the stream, I insisted we go into the bathing room. She would be invisible in the black room and I needed to get cleaned up anyway.

Wanda washed the dishes, while scrubbed the brown dirt out of my clothes and hair. I could hear her there, in the shallow end of the pool, scrubbing the plates. I was more relaxed than I had been all day, listening to the plates clang against one another as she stacked them in the darkness.

She was safe, for the moment, at least. And I would do whatever it takes to keep her that way.

As I was cleaning myself up, what Kyle had said to me the night before popped into my head. He thought I... that I was... _attracted_ to Wanda. What would make him think that?

Sure, she was pretty, but that was Melanie's body. Wanda was a... worm, stuck in her head.

_Clink_. I heard her stack another dish in the crate.

She wasn't human. But did that matter, really? She was sweet and kind. She was better than some of the humans here. Jared and Kyle and Maggie and Sharon and everyone else who mistreated her. She was better than _me_. I tried to kill her. I had strangled her, while she clawed at my hands. Begging for me to stop, while I suffocated her.

I didn't care what she was. She was a good person, human _or_ alien. She was different than the other souls. She was compassionate. Why couldn't Jared and Kyle see that? Why couldn't they see what I saw?

But what _were_ they seeing? What did Kyle see that made him think I liked her? She was my friend. I felt protective of her, responsible for her. I didn't want anything to happen to her. That didn't mean I had some ulterior motive for helping her. But what did it mean?

Today was nice, just me and her, talking. That was the most we'd ever really said to one another. And I liked being around her, I guess. Did I have feelings for Wanda?

As I scrubbed my shirt for the hundredth time, I realized I was taking too long, so I quickly finished up and started helping Wanda with the dishes.

When we were finished, we took the dishes back to the kitchen, which was beginning to fill up. We were having bologna and cheese sandwiches for lunch. Jamie was sitting there waiting for us, two stacks of sandwiches sitting next to him. His arms were crossed over his chest and he had a stubborn look in his eye as he stared at Wanda. I wondered what it was about, but from the way Wanda rolled her eyes at him I figured it was between them.

I quickly got my own lunch and went back to join them. None of us spoke, instead we just ate until we couldn't eat anymore. Well, I did, at least. It was funny, I used to hate bologna, but right now it was the best sandwich I had ever had in my entire life. I hadn't eaten since dinner last night and I hadn't slept in over twenty-four hours. I was exhausted.

"Get back to school, kid," I said to Jamie when he was finished eating.

He eyed me warily. "Maybe I should take over.…"

"Go to school," Wanda told him.

"I'll see you later, okay? Don't worry about… about anything," he said to her.

"Sure." She still didn't believe she would be okay, I could hear the lie in her voice.

Once Jamie was gone, she turned to me. "Go get some rest. I'll be fine―I'll stay someplace inconspicuous. Middle of a cornfield or something."

I wasn't letting her get away from me again like she did last night. "Where did you sleep last night?" I asked her.

"Why?"

"I can sleep there now, and you can be inconspicuous beside me."

"You can't watch me every second," she whispered.

"Wanna bet?"

That's exactly what I would do. Watch her every second, until I was sure she was safe.

She shrugged, then answered my question. "I was back at the… the hole. Where I was kept in the beginning."

I frowned. The poor thing had crept into that black storage hole to sleep. She let them treat her like an animal. She didn't see how wrong it was.

I wanted to take her back to my room. Tell her she could have it. Give her a real room to stay in, one that was her own, that she couldn't be kicked out of. But it was Kyle's room, too, and I didn't think me giving away our room to an alien would go over so well. So, instead, I got up and led her down the dark passageway to the storage area.

Once we were alone she spoke up.

"Ian, what's the point of this? Won't it hurt Jamie more, the longer I'm alive? In the end, wouldn't it be better for him if ―"

I stopped her. "Don't think like that, Wanda. We're not animals. Your death is not an inevitability."

How could anyone want to hurt this innocent creature? She amazed me. Instead of trying to escape and keep herself alive, like any normal person would have done, she was trying to make it easier on Jamie. She loved him that much. She'd die for him, a human that she'd just met two months ago. She'd let them kill her now, if it would be easier on the kid.

"I don't think you're an animal," she whispered.

"Thanks," I said. "I didn't say that as an accusation, though. I wouldn't blame you if you did."

She didn't answer. Both of us were preoccupied by the faint blue glow coming from up around the bend. Someone was waiting for us. Probably Jared. He'd known where to find her last night.

"Shh," I said quietly. "Wait here."

I pressed on her shoulder gently, trying to emphasize the _here_ part, then walked forward. I tried to be loud as I walked. Maybe he'd think it was just me.

"Jared?" I asked, trying to sound surprised to see him there, as I turned the corner.

"I know it's with you," he told me. Then looking past me into the darkness, he called out to Wanda. "Come out, come out, wherever you are."


	9. Warnings

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Sorry. I know I haven't updated in a while. I sort of got writer's block on this chapter. I know it's kind of short and probably not that good, but I just needed to write something... so, there. I have been reading The Vampire Diaries and wow! I love it. You guys should definitely check it out if you haven't already. I like Twilight a lot, but there is just no comparing the Cullen's to the Salvatore's. Lol :)**

**P.S. I promise to update soon!**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 9_

I ground my teeth as I heard Wanda step around the corner behind me. I was ready for a fight should one occur, but Jared looked just as exhausted as _I_ felt. He'd probably been awake twice as long as me. But if he did try anything, I was ready.

"At ease," Jared said to me. "I just want to talk to it. I promised the kid, and I'll stand by that promise."

"Where's Kyle?" Maybe he had promised he wouldn't hurt her, but did he promise he wouldn't find someone else who would.

"Snoring. Your cave might shake apart from the vibrations."

I didn't move and that seemed to annoy him a little.

"I'm not lying, Ian," he said, frustrated. "And I'm not going to kill it. Jeb is right. No matter how messed up this stupid situation is, Jamie has as much say as I do, and he's been totally suckered, so I doubt he'll be giving me the go-ahead anytime soon."

"No one's been suckered," I growled at him.

"It's not in any danger from me, is my point," he said, waving his hand, ending the fight before it got started. Then he looked at Wanda. "I won't hurt you again."

I heard Wanda take a step forward and spun around on my heel to face her. "You don't have to talk to him if you don't want to, Wanda. This isn't a duty or a chore to be done. It's not mandatory. You have a choice."

"No. I'll talk to him," she whispered.

I didn't like that. _I_ didn't want her anywhere near _him_. Protecting her would be so much easier if she wasn't being so stubborn about it.

She moved toward Jared slowly, pausing after every step. I moved with her, keeping tight to her side, pausing when she did.

"I'd like to talk to it alone, if you don't mind," Jared said, looking at me.

"I do mind." I took another step, firmly planting my feet on the ground.

"No, Ian, it's okay," Wanda whispered, nudging me gently with her elbow. "Go get some sleep. I'll be fine."

I stared at her for a while. Was she crazy? The last time she had seen him he was cutting up her face! How could she stand to be near him? I didn't want her anyway near him. But she wanted to talk to him. Why?

"This isn't some death wish? Sparing the kid?" I questioned.

"No. Jared wouldn't lie to Jamie about this."

Maybe she was right. Maybe he'd give her a chance. If he talked to her, got to know her, maybe...

"Please, Ian. I want to talk to him."

Her eyes were pleading with me, asking me to leave her with this man who had hurt her. I wanted to give her this, this small request. She had never asked me for anything before. I don't think she'd asked _anyone_ for anything before. But how could I leave her? If he hurt her... I'd... I'd... _kill him_. I would kill him if he hurt her.

I turned to look at Jared then. Well, glare, actually. I needed him to understand how serious I was. "Her name is _Wanda_, not _it_. You will not touch her. Any mark you leave on her, I will double on your worthless hide," I barked.

With that, I stomped off down the tunnel. I was angry. Why did Wanda have to be so damn selfless? Why couldn't she run and hide like a normal person would? I was pretty sure even a normal soul would have turned tail and run from a beating, but Wanda didn't.

I was back in the bright plaza now. I looked around, there were people gardening and others just milling around, but the only one I cared about at the moment was behind me in that dark hole in the ground.

How could I leave her like that? It was what she wanted, yes, but did she really know what was best for herself? Just as I was about to run back and save her from Jared, a hand touched my shoulder.

"Hey, Ian," Jamie smiled. His smile faded when he saw my face. "What's wrong? Where's Wanda?"

I shook my head. "She's with Jared. They're _talking_. Why aren't you in school?"

His eyes flickered to the tunnel behind me and he pursed his lips. "He won't do anything. He promised."

I sighed, and patted the kid on the shoulder. "Get to school, Jamie."

"_I am_. _I am_. I was just going to the restroom," he complained.

I was exhausted and the adrenaline rush I had had finding Jared in the storage cave had left me completely drained. I slowly but surely made my way down the hall to the living quarters.

When I got there, I could here Kyle snoring. He wouldn't be doing anything to Wanda tonight. But I was still worried about Jared. Maybe I could take a short nap while waiting for them to finish talking. _Yeah, that's it, just a few minutes and then I'll go down and make sure Wanda's okay_, I thought briefly before drifting into a deep sleep.

I don't know how long I had been asleep, but it wasn't nearly long enough, when I heard a voice say, "Now?"

"Yup. Have your lazy rear in the game room in five minutes. And bring your brother." That was Jeb.

_Wanda_, I thought, panicked.What time was it? I had to make sure Wanda was alright. How long had I been sleeping?

A quick glance up at the cracks in the ceiling answered my questions. It was after dark. I had slept all afternoon...

I looked to the doorway where Kyle had been talking to Jeb. Now he was putting the red door back in place. He turned back to look at me once the door was back in it's spot covering the entrance to our room.

I glared at him, still annoyed that he couldn't just believe in my judgement.

"What happened to you, Ian?" Kyle asked. He sounded tired. He was probably just as tired as I was, if not more.

"Nothing happened to me, Kyle. I just realized that it wouldn't be right to kill her. She never did anything wrong."

"Just her being here is wrong. Being on this planet is wrong. It's ours, not theirs!" he shouted.

"Kyle, she had nothing to do with them taking our planet from us. She was on another planet at the time. She just got here. You can't blame her for something..." I said, getting up off my mattress.

"That's right, Ian. She was on _another_ planet. Stealing it from whatever species lived there. She's a parasite, Ian. It's just what she is."

"Kyle, you don't know the first thing about her. She would never hurt anyone. She's a good person. She's _too_ good a person. She'd do anything to please those around her," I shouted back. If he wanted a shouting match he was going to get a shouting match.

"Guess that's why you like her." He was smiling. I wanted to smack the expression right off his face.

"Oh, grow up, Kyle. It's not like that."

"So, then, what _is_ it like? What did she say to you to make you believe her?" he asked. His voice was serious; he really wanted to know.

"Nothing. She doesn't talk about herself a whole lot," I told him, and then, smiling to myself, I added, "Except of course when we're bombarding her with questions about the rest of the universe."

Kyle made a sound like gagging and I looked up at him. Despite his attitude, Kyle seemed genuinely interested in what had happened while he was away. If I could convince Kyle that Wanda wasn't some scary alien, that she was good, maybe she'd actually have a chance.

"She's...not what you would expect. She is good. Better than most of us, I'd say. Better than me. She's been here for almost two months now and she hasn't tried to escape. And she could've, you know. She's had many opportunities. She slept in the storage area last night! Do you honestly think that she couldn't have found her way out if she had been trying?"

"Maybe," he said. "Or maybe it's just planning something bigger."

I rolled my eyes at him. He was just looking for an excuse to hate her now. He knew how easily she could have escaped if she had wanted to. I could see him searching his mind for the answer. Looking for some diabolical plan that she had cooked up, a plan the rest of us had somehow been blind to, everyone except Kyle, who was determined to figure it out.

"Kyle, I understand your nervous about her, but you don't have to be," I said soothingly, trying to quell his fears.

Out of nowhere Kyle pushed me. I fell back, tripping over my mattress and hitting the wall. Oh, if he wanted a fight, he was going to get a fight. I was tired, but not enough to pass up an opportunity to pound on my ignorant brother.

I tackled him onto his mattress and we wrestled around for a few minutes. That was, until Jeb came back. One cock of the rifle and our fight was over. We both got to out feet and followed him silently to the game room, while he yelled at us for being late.

When we got to the game room, I could see Jared standing there, waiting. I glared at him and I knew he saw it. If I found even one hair out of place on Wanda's head, I'd...

Jeb cleared his throat and then got started. "Y'all know why we're here, so I'll get right to it. You boys aren't gonna be causing any trouble for our friend Wanda, are you?"

I looked at Jared, who was shaking his head. Then I looked at Kyle. He had his jaw clenched tightly and was glaring at Jeb. I sighed, frustrated by my brother's stubbornness.

"Kyle, Wanda's a part of our community, now. You're going to have to accept that," Jeb stated smoothly.

"Jeb, it's not one of us! It's dangerous!" he started to scream.

"You know, I hate to do this, Kyle... But if you can't live here, peacefully, with Wanda, then I have no choice but to ask you to leave," Jeb said grimly.

It had the effect Jeb was going for, Kyle froze. He looked incredulously at _me_, as if he needed confirmation of Jeb's words.

I know I should have tried to control the smile that was plastered on my face. Should've tried to keep my face flat, if only to help ease Kyle into this new revelation of his. I could see the realization that I cared about Wanda more than I did my own brother hit him. But it wasn't true. I did care about Kyle, very much. It was just that I knew he wouldn't choose to leave over something so stupid. He wouldn't leave his family, his _home_, over some stupid grudge.

He stared at me for a moment or two and took a few deep breaths before looking at Jeb.

"I'll stay," he said quietly. I knew he would. He looked unhappy about it, but he wasn't going to leave, and he'd get used to Wanda. He'd see.

"Good, then. I expect we won't be having any more problems," Jeb grinned, shaking the barrel of the gun in Kyle's direction.

"Alright, I guess we're done here. You know, I think Wanda's down in the kitchen, teaching her class, if you want to go listen. It's very interesting stuff," he added, looking at Kyle and Jared in turn.

They both shook their heads and quietly left the game room.

"I really hated doing that," Jeb sighed, as soon as their footsteps faded down the eastern tunnel.

"Yeah, but it's what he needed to hear. He'll get over it, eventually. We just have to watch out for her until he does," I said, patting his shoulder as I walked passed.

I decided to stop by the kitchen and check up on Wanda. She was standing in front of the oven talking about the Dolphins. I stayed in entrance of the kitchen and just watched her for a minute, smiling to myself. She was okay. Besides the huge wound on her cheek, there was nothing wrong with her. Jared didn't injure her after I had left.

When I was content that she was alright, I made my way back to my room and fell asleep, too relieved that Wanda was alive to pay much attention to Kyle's glares.


	10. Delusional

**Stephenie Meyer owns The Host.**

**Thanks to everyone who is reading this story! You guys are great and I love hearing that you're enjoying my writing ;)**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 10_

The next day, everything went back to normal, or as normal as it was going to get. Kyle stalked through the halls, glowering every time he saw Wanda. There was nothing I could do about it, he'd get over it in time, but I hated the look on _her_ face every time she saw him. It was a mixture of fear and guilt. She shouldn't feel guilty for being here, for being alive.

That night after dinner, I went to her class. I sat on the counter next to the stove where she was baking bread. Geoffrey was asking her about the Soul's medicines.

Walter was sick. He had cancer, and it was _very_ bad according to Doc. He wouldn't last much longer. Everyone in the caves was upset, except Wanda, because Jamie and I decided she didn't need to know about it right now. She had enough on her plate as it was.

But she was a Soul and everyone knew that the Soul's had ways to cure diseases. When they had taken over they cured most diseases, if not all of them. I had never heard of one of them getting sick. So now, Geoffrey was questioning Wanda. Only problem was, Wanda didn't know anything about it. She hadn't learned about _Healing_. When Geoffrey realized she couldn't help heal Walter, he hung his head. He wasn't mad at Wanda, but from the look on his face _she_ would think he was.

No one said anything, the room was completely silent. Most of the people there had angry looks on their faces, some even staring at Wanda. It wasn't Wanda's fault that Walter was sick. They shouldn't be angry because she couldn't just snap her fingers and cure cancer. We never figured out how to cure cancer and even though the Souls knew doesn't mean Wanda should. _That would be like asking Kyle to quote Shakespeare_, I thought. Not everyone knows everything.

"Uh―about the Vultures…" I said, trying to think of someway to change the subject. I could tell Wanda was already trying to figure out what she had done to offend everyone. "I don't know if I missed this part sometime, but I don't remember you ever explaining about them being 'unkind'… ?"

So she explained. Jamie and I kept asking questions until Jeb basically sent us all to bed. He said it was late and we had an early day ahead of us.

"What did I say?" Wanda whispered to me once the room was almost empty.

"Nothing. They've got mortality on their minds." I sighed.

"Where's Walter?" she demanded.

I sighed again. She was quick putting it together. "He's in the south wing. He's… not doing well."

"Why didn't anyone tell me?"

"Things have been… difficult for you lately, so…"

She shook her head, annoyed that I hadn't told her. "What's wrong with him?"

Jamie walked over and took her hand. "Some of Walter's bones snapped, they're so brittle," he whispered. "Doc's sure it's cancer―final stages, he says."

"Walt must have been keeping quiet about the pain for a long while now," I said quietly.

She flinched at that. "And there's nothing to be done? Nothing at all?"

I shook my head. "Not for us. Even if we weren't stuck here, there would be no help for him now. We never cured that one."

She bit down on her lip and shifted her gaze to the floor. I could tell she was thinking about something―maybe she was trying to remember something she had forgotten about Healing. She looked so sad, so... grieved that Walter, a human, was dying.

"He's been asking for you," I said. "Well, he says your name sometimes; it's hard to tell what he means―Doc's keeping him drunk to help with the pain."

"Doc feels real bad about using so much of the alcohol himself. Bad timing, all around," Jamie muttered.

"Can I see him?" Wanda asked. "Or will that make the others unhappy?"

I frowned. "Wouldn't that be just like some people, to get worked up over this? Who cares, though, right? If it's Walt's final wish…"

"Right," she said softly. She looked on the verge of tears. "If seeing me is what Walter wants, then I guess it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, or if they get mad."

"Don't worry about that―I'm not going to let anybody harass you," I assured her, my voice tight.

"Is it too late to go tonight? Will we disturb him?"

"He's not sleeping regular hours. We can go see."

Before I even had time to turn around she had dragged Jamie halfway down the hall. I chased after them and we all walked into the main plaza together. There were a few people gathered around talking or just passing through. They barely even looked over at the three of us making our way to the southern tunnel. Then I saw Kyle.

He was talking to Brandt and some of the others. But when he saw us, when he saw Wanda and Jamie holding hands, I thought he might run over and start a fight right here, regardless of what Jeb had told him.

And maybe I shouldn't have done it, maybe I should have just growled right back at Kyle and left it at that, but I couldn't. He needed to understand that people here cared about Wanda and that we weren't going to let him hurt her.

I reached down and took Wanda's hand in mine. Kyle made a sound like gagging and then turned away as we entered the southern tunnel.

Wanda tried to pull her hand away from me once we were safely in the dark corridor, but I just held her tighter.

"I wish you wouldn't make him angrier," she murmured.

She thought I was only holding her hand to make Kyle mad. But that wasn't the reason. I took her hand to show her and Kyle that she was considered a friend here, someone we all cared about. But her hand was so soft and warm, it felt nice. I started to think about those things Kyle had said again. About me feeling something other than just friendship for Wanda.

"Kyle is wrong," I said, trying to distract myself from the warm tingling feeling in the hand that held Wanda's. "Being wrong is sort of a habit with him. He'll take longer than anyone else to get over it, but that doesn't mean we should make allowances for him."

He would get over it, but in the meantime I wasn't going to act differently around Wanda or stay away just to protect my brother's feelings.

"He frightens me," she whispered. "I don't want him to have more reasons to hate me."

I squeezed her hand and felt completely ashamed of my brother. She was afraid of him. I mean, I knew that she was, but this was the first time she had ever admitted to being afraid of anything. She had walked around the caves with me when she thought I was planning on killing her and she never once said she was afraid. I felt horrible that it was Kyle that she was so scared of, that it was _my_ family. It made me feel responsible.

"Jeb's made his opinion very clear," I said at the same time Jamie said, "Don't be afraid."

"What do you mean?" she asked, looking up at me even though it was too dark for her to see my face clearly.

"If Kyle can't accept Jeb's rules, then he's no longer welcome here."

"But that's wrong. Kyle belongs here," she cried.

"He's staying… so he'll just have to learn to deal," I told her.

None of us spoke for the rest of the walk. When we finally reached the glowing blue light of the hospital, Wanda seemed to tense a little. She didn't like this place, even if she wasn't scared of Doc, the hospital would always scare her.

Doc was asleep on one of the cots and Walter was on another. He was awake, but probably still drunk.

When he looked toward me I asked, "Are you up for visitors, Walt?"

"Ungh," he moaned.

"Is there anything you need?" Wanda asked, pulling her hands free from both me and Jamie.

My hand felt empty without hers wrapped in it. I had an urge to reach out and grab her again, but she stepped forward to stand closer to Walter.

"Is there anything we can do for you? Anything at all?" she asked him again.

His eyes were rolling around in his head, but the second they crossed her face they focused.

"Finally," Walter gasped, sucking in a wheezing breath. "I knew you would come if I waited long enough. Oh, Gladys, I have so much to tell you."

Wanda froze and then looked behind her like she was expecting to see someone standing there.

"Gladys was his wife. She didn't escape," Jamie explained when Wanda caught his eye. She was still confused, only now she looked like she was about to panic.

"Gladys," Walter mumbled. "Would you believe I went and got cancer? What are the odds, eh? Never took a sick day in my life…"

Wanda was standing between me and Walter's cot looking like she was about to turn and run. I gave her a gentle push forward.

"What should I do?" she asked, her voice shaky and low, desperate.

". . . grandfather lived to be a hundred and one. Nobody ever had cancer in my family, not even the cousins." Walter rattled on, barely audible. "Didn't your aunt Regan have skin cancer, though?"

I gave her another gentle poke in the back.

"Um..." she said, unsure of what to do.

"Maybe that was Bill's aunt," Walter answered himself.

Wanda looked back at me, asking me, pleading with me for an answer. She even mouthed, "Help," so I motioned for her to take Walter's hand. Once she was holding his frail hand in her soft, tan one, he began to mumble again.

"Ah, Gladdie, it's been hard without you. It's a nice place here; you'll like it, even when I'm gone. Plenty of people to talk to―I know how you need to have your conversation.…"

There was a wet rag lying on the cot next to Walter. I walked over and began gently wiping it over his forehead.

"I'm not good at… at deception," she whispered. She never took her eyes off of Walter. "I don't want to upset him."

Well, obviously she wasn't any good at deception. I doubt she could lie to save her own life.

"You don't have to say anything," I told her. "He's not lucid enough to care."

And it was the truth. Walter's eyes were rolling around in his head and, even though he spoke, it was just old memories. He was speaking to ghosts, not to Wanda. He wasn't even really aware that _Wanda_ was in the room.

"Do I look like her?" she asked.

"Not a bit―I've seen her picture. Stocky redhead." I couldn't help but smile at her. She looked absolutely nothing like Walter's wife and still for some reason he was seeing her as his Gladys.

She was still slightly panicky, but much better than before. As always though, she had to busy herself with something.

"Here, let me do that," she said, taking the wet rag from my hands. She started to wipe Walter's sweat stained face.

"Thanks, Gladdie, that's nice," Walter thanked her.

Doc came up behind me, then. We must have woken him up, Doc always was a light sleeper. "How is he?" he asked.

"Delusional," I whispered. "Is that the brandy or the pain?"

"More the pain, I would think. I'd trade my right arm for some morphine."

"Maybe Jared will produce another miracle."

"Maybe," Doc muttered. He was really taking this hard. He felt guilty about using up the brandy, yes, but I think he also felt guilty about not being able to cure Walter. To fix him. Doc felt guilty that Walt was going to die, but it wasn't his fault. Like I told Wanda, even if we weren't stuck here, there just wasn't anything to be done for him.

To get his mind off of it, I told him about some things that had been going on around the caves while he was... incapacitated.

"What happened to Wanda's face?" Doc whispered, trying to keep Wanda from hearing.

"More of the same," I managed to get out through the rage that was building inside me. I had almost forgotten about that. Well, maybe not forgotten, but when he asked about it I couldn't help but be reminded of how angry I was.

I glanced over my shoulder at Wanda, she was holding Walter's hand and wiping the beads of moisture off of his pale, pain-contorted face. How could anyone think that she was dangerous? How could anyone want to harm her?

Doc made an angry―well, for him anyway―groan.

"Geoffrey was asking about the Soul medicines during her class tonight," I told him. I needed to talk about something else and this seemed like a topic he might be interested in. "They all got a little upset when Wanda told them she had never learned about Healing."

"It would have been convenient if Melanie had been possessed by a Healer," Doc said. He had a far off look in his eyes, like he was _imagining_ what he could've learned if Melanie had been implanted with a Healer.

"We're lucky it was Wanda. No one else ―"

"I know," Doc interrupted. "I guess I should say, it's too bad Wanda didn't have more of an interest in medicine."

"I'm sorry," Wanda apologized. Her voice was quiet, almost like she was ashamed that she wasn't what Doc wanted.

I hated when she did that to herself, when she would make herself feel guilty about something that she had absolutely no control over. Wanda was _Wanda_ and that was good enough. She should know that no one expected anything more from her. None of this was her fault.

I walked over and put my hand on her shoulder. "You have nothing to apologize for."

Wanda didn't say anything, but she did look around the room. When I followed her gaze, I noticed Jamie, sound asleep on the cot Doc had been lying on. Walter had also fallen asleep.

"It's late," Doc said. "Walter's not going anywhere tonight. You should get some sleep."

"We'll be back," I uttered. "Let us know what we can bring, for either of you."

Wanda put Walter's hand back down on the cot, patting it gently. As she did, Walter's eyes opened abruptly.

"Are you leaving?" he breathed. "Do you have to go so soon?"

"No, I don't have to leave," Wanda said, wrapping her hand around his again. This calmed him down and he closed his eyes.

I sighed, already knowing what she was going to say.

"You can go," Wanda told me. "I don't mind. Take Jamie back to his bed."

"Hold on a sec," I said, walking over to the closest empty cot and bringing it back for Wanda. I placed it next to Walter's; Wanda had to stretch her arm so I could put the cot in its place while she kept her grip on Walter at the same time. Then I put one arm under her shoulders, while the other scooped up her legs and I lifted her onto the cot. She gasped quietly.

"Do you think you can sleep like that?" I asked, motioning with my head toward Walter's hand locked around hers.

"Yes, I'm sure I can," she assured me.

I smiled at her. "Sleep well, then."

Then I turned and picked Jamie up off of his cot. "Let's go, kid," I said to the sleeping boy as I carried him from the hospital.

When I got to his room the kid was still sleeping. I tried to remove the green room divider that covered the doorway, but it was proving to be more difficult than I had originally thought.

When a hand reached out and moved the screen out of my way, I turned to thank its owner. But instead of Trudy or Lily or someone, _anyone_ else, I turn around to see Kyle standing next to me―green screen in hand.

A scowl just sort of broke out onto my face. I guess it was because of Wanda, because of everything she was doing for Walter, but somehow _his_ hatred of her turned into _my_ hatred of him. I could feel it sweep through me. I'm sure, if I really thought about it, I would probably realize I didn't _hate_ my brother, but right now it sure felt that way.

Kyle shook his head and laughed as I placed Jamie on the bed. "What are you doing?"

"We were visiting Walter and the kid fell asleep," I explained, hoping he'd drop the subject.

"So _she_ told you to take him to bed," he laughed again.

"Shut up, Kyle," I whispered fiercely, afraid that if I raised my voice any louder I might wake Jamie. "I'm too tired to deal with you right now."

Kyle just laughed and walked back to our room.

Why did he have to be such an idiot? Why couldn't I have a reasonable, intelligent brother? No, instead I got a meathead who couldn't tell his right from his left. He'd never even be able to comprehend the difference between Wanda and a Seeker. He'd always see her as a threat.

I hung out in Jared's room with Jamie for a while. The kid was out cold, but I had more than enough to think about to keep me busy.

I sat there thinking about how Wanda was selfless enough to stay with Walter tonight, even though I knew how much she hated the hospital. I thought about how uncomfortable she must be, sleeping on that cot, if she was able to get any sleep at all. I can't imagine falling asleep next to a dying old man is easy. Hearing him moan in pain, holding his hand...

...holding _her_ hand. Wanda's hand was so soft and warm. It was nice holding her hand. We had walked the entire way to the hospital like that. Yeah, sure, she tried to pull away, but that was only because she didn't want to upset Kyle. Once we were away from him she hadn't seemed hesitant.

_What am I saying?_ I asked myself, shaking my head.

I was all alone in the dark cave, just me and the dead-to-the-world Jamie.

What was I doing? I knew I liked Wanda, sure, but as a friend, right? That was it, she was just my friend. I could be friends with a Soul, I could protect her from Kyle and Jared and anyone else who tried to touch her, but could I do anything more?

I wasn't sure.

Wanda was an amazing person, but did I like her because of what Kyle had said? Did he put this idea in my head and now I'm stuck with it? Or did I like Wanda because of who she was?

_Definitely because of who she is_, I told myself. I didn't even really have to think about that. It had nothing to do with Kyle, my feelings for Wanda were strictly because of Wanda.

She really was an amazing person. I mean, just take what she was doing for Walter. And she was so sweet. I bet she never said a bad word about anybody in her entire life, which was a really a long time. And the way she always smelled like baking bread. She never smelled like dank, musty cave like the rest of us. She always smelled good. And...

_And_, she's an alien, Ian. That was Kyle's voice in my head, telling me that I'm being stupid, that it could never work. And he was right. I could never be with Wanda.

First off, she _is_ an alien. I'm a human. Her kind hate us, they eradicated us from our own planet. Why should she feel any different?

Second, she's inside of Jared's girlfriend's body. That presents a whole other set of issues to deal with. Jared would probably blow a gasket. Even if he wanted nothing to do with Wanda, he would still freak out if anyone else went near Melanie's body. And then there's Melanie. Wanda told me she's still in there with her. I could never do anything with Wanda if Melanie was still there. It would be so unfair to her, disrespectful. It would be like forcing Melanie to be with me, even if Wanda wanted to.

Which leads me to my third point. Why would Wanda want _me_? She could probably get any guy on this planet, hell, in the universe. She's beautiful, tall, athletic... _those legs_! But that wasn't what I found most attractive. Her eyes, they had a way of holding my gaze every time I looked at her. It was like I got trapped in those lustrous, silver eyes.

She was beautiful, body _and_ Soul. Why would she want to be with someone who had tried to kill her? She could do so much better than me...

But she was stuck _here_, in these caves, with us. She couldn't leave, they wouldn't let her, so I guess it didn't really matter. _I'm just going to forget about all of _this_ and just keep her safe_, I thought.

It was all I could do. The rest of it, it didn't matter. As long as she was safe, I was happy.


	11. Nightmare

**Stephenie Meyer owns The Host.**

**A big thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter. I got more reviews for chapter ten than I have for any other chapter so far.**

**So, I was wondering, who do you guys want to play Ian and Jared and everyone in The Host movie? My dream cast would be Ian Somerhalder (he is so perfect with his blue eyes) as Ian. Jensen Ackles _is_ Jared. He would be the best because he would make Jared so much more lovable. Personally, I like Megan Fox as Melanie (because she's got the perfect attitude for the part) but she might not be able to pull off Wanda, so I'm not sure who I would want. Kyle ??? I have no idea about him. But for Sunny, I say Rachel Bilson would be amazing.**

**Well, anyway, let me know what you guys think.**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 11_

The next morning, Wanda and I were supposed to be clearing the cornfield, but when I went to the hospital to get her, Walter woke up. He recognized her... at first.

Walt was in a lot of pain so Doc gave him some more brandy. It knocked him right out, but that might have been the pain more than the alcohol. We were about to leave when Walter started calling for Gladys again. I knew better than to try to convince Wanda to leave him, so instead I shrugged and promised to bring back breakfast for her and Doc.

Wanda needed a break from Walter, she had spent the whole night there with him. But she knew how little time he had left, and if Wanda thought she was comforting him by being there, then she'd stay, no matter what. I knew that, so I was going to stay with her. If she was going to sit there with Walter, listening to his cries of pain, then I was too. She needed company, she needed someone to lighten the situation a little. When I reached the entrance to the main plaza, though, all of my plans were thrown out the window.

Jeb was walking toward the entrance of the caves... with Kyle. When they saw me they stopped.

"Ian, go help Aaron and Brandt get things packed up." Jeb said.

"What? What's going on? What happened?" I asked, looking back and forth between their faces. They looked... anxious, well, Kyle did anyway. Jeb just looked a little more serious than normal.

"Nothing." Jeb assured me. "Just a precaution. Now, get going. Those boys will be needin' some help."

I looked at Kyle one more time. He just nodded his head in the direction of the storage cave. I knew that if something was wrong Kyle would tell me, so I walked off without another word.

If there was one thing I knew, it was that Kyle would never lie to me about something important. He may be an ignorant jackass, but he wasn't a liar. His opinion of Wanda was just proof of that.

Kyle hated Wanda, and I was mad at him because of it, but I knew the real reason behind his hatred. He didn't trust her and he didn't want me to get hurt. Of course he was concerned with the safety of everyone else here in the caves―over the years they had become like family―but when we were on the run, Kyle had done everything that was in his ability to keep me safe. Kyle was the only one I had left and I was the only one he had. He hated Wanda because he thought she would eventually hurt us, get us all killed. I understood _why_ he felt the way he did, but I still didn't agree with it.

When I reached the storage area Aaron explained what was going on while we packed everything up. Apparently, the Seeker―the one that was looking for Wanda―was flying around out in the desert in a helicopter. She was looking for us, or Wanda actually, but still...

After about half an hour or so, Kyle and Jeb showed up to help us pack. There wasn't much left by then, just the rest of the water―there was another cave system we could stay in, but it didn't have water, so we had to bring enough to last for a while―and some blankets to sleep on. If we did have to evacuate, we'd only be able to last a few days before we'd have to make a raid―there was no way to bring all of the food with us.

Shortly after Kyle showed up, Brandt left. I didn't really think much of it, until I went back to the hospital with breakfast and lunch for Wanda and Doc.

When I saw Brandt sitting in the corner eyeballing Wanda, I almost lost it. I was glaring at him while he tried to explain what he was doing, why he was there. My idiot brother got it in his head that Wanda was going to try and signal the Seeker. Then he sent Brandt down here to _secure_ her. I purposefully sat on cot in between him and Wanda. I didn't want him staring at her. She shouldn't have to feel his accusing glare on the back of her head.

When Jamie came by with dinner for all of us, Wanda made me take him back to the kitchen. Walter had gotten worse. Doc ran out of brandy around noon, so since then Walt had been moaning in pain. Doc was taking it really hard. He looked in almost as much pain as Walter. Jared had gone out on a raid to find Walter some medicine. Just anything to ease the pain, but we had our doubts to whether or not he'd be able to find anything.

After dinner I took Jamie back to his room. I had promised Wanda I'd stay with him all night to make sure he didn't try to go back to the hospital. I didn't really want him there either. It was bad enough Wanda wanted to stay, Jamie didn't need to witness Walt's last few, painful hours. I didn't really want to leave Wanda in the hospital with Brandt, but Doc had insisted he'd keep an eye on her.

I fell asleep that night in Jared and Jamie's room, thinking about how odd this whole situation was. Somehow I had developed feeling for Wanda. I liked her, I thought she was an amazing human being. Only problem was, she wasn't a human being. And she was living inside the body of my friend's girlfriend. I knew I should be totally creeped out just thinking about that, but I wasn't. I really didn't care that Wanda wasn't human. Wanda was like... well, sort of like a mind that didn't have a body. Just a personality. A personality that I liked. A lot. A liked talking to her and being around her. She was nice and funny and, yes, her body was beautiful, but would I be attracted to it without Wanda? If it had been Melanie, _just_ Melanie, in the desert that day, would I feel the same way now?

No.

I didn't know Melanie, and even if I did I don't think I would feel this way. If I knew Melanie now, I'd just be comparing her to Wanda. Thinking of the way Wanda walks, the way she smiles, the way her she says my name. Not the way her voice sounds when she says it, but the way she pronounces it. It just sounds better than when other people say it.

No. I was beginning to _really_ like _Wanda_, not Melanie. If I wasn't careful I was going to fall in love with this girl. No, not a girl, an alien, a... parasite. Not a parasite. A beautiful, loving _girl_, that lived as a human now. That was all that mattered, right? She was in a human body, so _she_ was human.

***********************************************

I woke up completely confused. I didn't know where I was or what time it was. Then I heard it. The most horrifying scream ever.

_Wanda_. I immediately remembered everything. Wanda was alone... in the hospital. But the sound I heard wasn't coming from the hospital, I wouldn't have been able to hear it in my room. No, not my room, Jared's.

I jumped up from the bed and ran down the hall, only stopping long enough to kick in the red door of my room and see that Kyle wasn't there. I was going to kill him if he hurt her. But he wasn't trying to hurt her, he wanted to... to _kill_ her. He was killing her.

I kept running. I ran all the way to Jeb's room. I needed the gun. Jeb must have been asleep, but he was a light sleeper. Probably, he heard me coming because he was awake by the time I reached his door.

"It's Wanda," I yelled. "She screamed. I need the gun, Jeb. Kyle's not in our room, I need the gun."

Horror flashed in his eyes and he grabbed the gun from it's spot on the floor next to his mattress. I grabbed it from him and took off running again. I think he wanted to come too, but I was faster, I could get there quicker. Only where was _there_?

Where _was_ she?

"No!" I heard the horrible shrieking again. It was Wanda and I think it was coming from the river room.

I had been standing in the main plaza, but now I was sprinting down the tunnel to the river room. I was so afraid I wasn't going to be able to find her after that first scream, but now she was yelling again. I knew where she was.

"Help me! Somebody! Help!"

I ran as fast as I could. Whatever Kyle was doing, Wanda was still alive.

"Wanda? Wanda!" I yelled.

"Help me! Kyle! The floor! Help!"

"Wanda! Where are you?"

I burst through into the river room. I was ready for the worst. I knew that I'd have to get Kyle away from Wanda by threatening him with the gun. But what if he didn't think I'd do it? What if he didn't listen, didn't stop? I figured I could shoot him if I had to, I could hit him in the leg. He'd be fine, a bullet in the leg wouldn't kill him. But I'd only do it if I had to.

"Watch out!" she screamed at me. "The floor is breaking up! I can't hold him much longer!"

It was early, but the sky was bright enough to see what was going on. Wanda was on the floor, her arms and legs locked around a stone pillar next to a hole in the ground. A hole that had not been there before. And on the other side of the pillar, dipping down into the hole, was Kyle.

The floor had cracked by the river, it had broken and now Wanda was keeping Kyle's unconscious body from falling into the steaming hot water and being swept away. What had happened in here?

But I didn't have time for explanations. Kyle was falling. I threw the gun to the ground and took a step toward Wanda.

"Get down―disperse your weight!" she screamed.

I dropped to my hands and knees and made my way to her.

"Don't let go," I warned. I was trying to think of the best way to get Kyle from her. She must have been in agony trying to hold him up. He was probably twice her weight, and she didn't have the greatest hold on him.

I slid behind her and wrapped my arms around her, the pillar, and Kyle.

"One, two, three!" I grunted, pulling Kyle up higher on the rock. I had a better grip on him now, but I still needed to get him away from the hissing hot-spring.

"I'm going to pull him to this side. Can you squeeze out?" I asked Wanda, who was now squished in between me and the stone pillar.

"I'll try," she said.

She was able to slide out. Then she made her way back toward the door. When I looked back at the rock in front of me, it was stained red. _Blood_. She must have smashed her face again, or _I_ smashed her face when I lifted Kyle up higher on the rock.

I dragged Kyle around the side of pillar. The floor started crumbling again, but only a little at the edge of the hole. Somehow I managed to get Kyle all the way into the hall. It took all the strength I had to haul my brother out of that room, and now I was collapsed in the hallway with my arm wrapped around his shoulders.

"What… the hell… happened?" I panted.

"Our weight… was too… much. Floor caved in." Wanda was gasping for breath also.

"What were you doing… by the edge? With Kyle?"

It didn't make any sense. Why, of all people, would she have been by the river with Kyle?

She put her head down on her knees and breathed.

In. Out. In. Out. Over and over again.

After a minute of deep breathing, I realized she wasn't going to answer my question.

"Wanda?" I wanted an answer, even if she didn't want to tell me.

"Nothing," she lied. She kept her head down and breathed in and out a few more times.

"You're a rotten liar. You know that, right?" I asked. "What did he do?"

"Nothing," she tried again. It sounded just as false as the first time.

I gently took her chin in my hand and looked at her carefully. "Your nose is bleeding." And then I twisted her head to the side. "And there's more blood in your hair."

"I―hit my head when the floor fell." Another lie.

"On both sides?"

She shrugged.

I couldn't figure out what she was doing. She had cuts and bruises all over, obviously Kyle had assaulted her. Why wouldn't she tell me?

"We should get Kyle to Doc―he really cracked his head when he went down," she said after a minute.

"Why are you protecting him? He tried to kill you." He had tried to _kill_ her. By the river. The floor by the river fell in because the were both standing by the edge. Kyle tried to...

"He was going to throw you in the river.…" My whole body shook, with rage? Fear? Hatred? I don't know. I couldn't get the image out of my mind. Kyle standing by the bubbling whole in the ground watching Wanda being burned alive and then she would be gone. Swept away with the current. I wouldn't have ever known what happened to her. There wouldn't have been any evidence, nothing. The perfect murder. My brother had come up with the perfect murder.

I shoved Kyle away from me, hard. I hated him. I thought I understood what Kyle was thinking. I thought he was just being stupid and stubborn, trying to protect me. I never thought he'd actually...

I slid over to Wanda and wrapped my arms around her, holding her tightly to my chest. I had almost lost her today. If he had... If I didn't wake up... If the floor hadn't cracked...

"I should roll him right back in there and kick him over the edge myself," I mumbled.

She shook her head violently. Panicking. "No."

"Saves time. Jeb made the rules clear. You try to hurt someone here, there are penalties. There'll be a tribunal."

She tried to pull away from me then, but I just held her tighter to me. I couldn't let go. I was scared that I almost lost her. When I heard her scream before... I thought I might have been too late. What would I have done? How could my own brother try to kill the girl I...

I loved her.

"No. You can't do that, because no one broke the rules. The floor collapsed, that's all," she was pleading. She must have known I could hear the lie.

"Wanda ―" I began, roughly.

"He's your brother," was all she said.

"He knew what he was doing. He's my brother, yes, but he did what he did, and you are... you are…" ...everything. I love you. I'd kill anyone that tries to touch you because I'm completely in love with you. But instead I settled for, "my friend."

How could I tell her that I loved her? Would she understand? How was it even possible that I be in love with her? I'd known her for only a couple of months. I knew I liked her, knew I was attracted to her, knew I was on the verge of something... more. But now I was absolutely positive. I loved her. I was in love with Wanda.

"He did nothing. He is human," she whispered. "This is his place, not mine."

"We're not having this discussion again. Your definition of human is not the same as mine. To you, it means something… negative. To me, it's a compliment―and by my definition, you are and he isn't. Not after this," I growled.

"Human isn't a negative to me. I know you now. But Ian, he's your _brother_."

"A fact that shames me." She was hung up on Kyle being my brother. I didn't care that he was my brother. I hated that he was related to me. He was a murderer.

When she pushed away from me again, I let go. But only because she groaned in pain.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"I think so. We need to find Doc, but I don't know if I can walk. I―I hit my leg, when I fell."

I growled at that. She was lying again, which meant Kyle had hurt her leg bad enough that she couldn't walk. Did he cripple her so that she couldn't escape? "Which leg? Let me see."

She tried to straighten her right leg out for me to see it, but she moaned again. Could she have broken it? I took her ankle in my hands, twisting it slowly, testing to see if it was broken. But that wasn't what was bothering her.

"Higher. Here." She grabbed my hands and pulled them to her thigh, right above her knee. Her leg was bruised, badly. She moaned again when I pressed on it. "It's not broken or anything, I don't think. Just really sore."

"Deep muscle bruise, at least," I muttered. "And how did this happen?"

"Must have… landed on a rock when I fell."

I sighed, giving up. She wasn't going to tell me the truth. For some reason she had it in her head that Kyle should be excused of his actions simply because he was human. I wasn't going to fight with her about it, but I certainly wasn't going to let Kyle go unpunished. "Okay, let's get you to Doc."

"Kyle needs him more than I do."

"I have to go find Doc anyway―or some help. I can't carry Kyle that far, but I can certainly carry you." Then I remembered the gun. I dropped it near the entrance to the river room. "Oops―hold on."

_That would've been a great idea. Just leave the gun here with the murderer_, I thought while I grabbed the gun and hurried back to Wanda.

"Lets go," I said, handing the rifle to her. She held it out away from her in her palms. She didn't close her fists around the barrel, she just let it sit there in her open hands, looking uncomfortable.

I had to laugh. "How anyone could be afraid of you…"

I quickly scooped her up into my arms and started walking for the hospital. She was hurting, trying to keep the sensitive bruises from touching anything, and I tried not to jostle her around too much.

"How'd your clothes get so wet?" I asked as we passed under a crack in the ceiling. I could see her face in the dim light and I smiled, but I don't think I looked very happy. I was picturing Wanda in the scalding hot river again.

"I don't know. Steam?" she said, unsure, as we passed back into the darkness.

"You're missing a shoe."

"Oh." She still wasn't going to talk to me.

As we passed through another beam of light, I looked into her eyes.

"I'm… _very_ glad that you weren't hurt, Wanda. Hurt worse, I should say." Because she was hurt. Badly. Kyle had really messed her up. But she was alive. I hadn't lost her, she was safe in my arms and I wasn't going to let anyone hurt her ever again, because I couldn't handle losing her. I loved her.


	12. Anxiety

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Alright here's chapter 12. Oh, and I forgot to tell you who I'd pick to play Wanda last time. I would so love for Kristin Bell to play Pet/Wanda. I love her and think her and Ian Somerhalder are so cute together. If you haven't seen the movie _Pulse_, watch it. They're the main characters and they're amazing, even if the movie is a little weird.**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 12_

I was almost to the main plaza, Wanda in my arms, when we ran into Jeb.

"You were right, then," Jeb said, his jaw clenched. "I didn't hear a shot. Kyle?"

"He's unconscious," Wanda blurted out before I could say anything. "You need to warn everyone―part of the floor collapsed in the river room. I don't know how stable it is now. Kyle hit his head really hard trying to get out of the way. He needs Doc."

"That's the story," I said, doubtfully. "And she's apparently sticking to it."

Jeb laughed, he was looking at the gun in Wanda's hand. "Let me take that off your hands."

She held the gun―it was resting in her open palms―out for Jeb to take. He laughed at her again.

"I'll get Andy and Brandt to help me with Kyle. We'll follow behind you," Jeb said.

"Keep a close eye on him when he wakes up," I told him, as he walked off looking for others to help with Kyle.

"Kyle could be really hurt.… Jeb should hurry." Wanda cautioned as I carried her to the hospital.

"Kyle's head is harder than any rock in this place," I joked.

When we reached the hospital Doc and Jared were leaning against Doc's desk talking. I guess Jared got back sometime last night. And he must have found something for Walter, because the old man was knocked out cold. He was even snoring. It was nice, at least he wasn't suffering right now.

Both Jared and Doc looked startled to see me carrying Wanda into the room. Doc made his way over as I laid Wanda down on an empty cot and straightened her right leg out, trying not to cause her any further pain.

"What now?" Doc asked angrily. He wiped Wanda's cheek with a rag, trying to wash some of the blood off.

I said, "Kyle," at the same time Wanda said, "The floor―"

Doc looked between the two of us. He was confused. _I_ was confused. I still didn't understand why she insisted on lying. She knew we wouldn't fall for it. But I wasn't going to fight with her about it.

I sighed, rolling my eyes and laying one hand on her forehead. "The floor crumbled by the first river hole. Kyle fell back and cracked his head on a rock. Wanda saved his worthless life. She says she fell, too, when the floor gave." I gave Doc a look that told him that I didn't believe one word of what I was saying. "_Something_ bashed the back of her head pretty good. Her nose is bleeding but not broken, I don't think. She's got some damage to the muscle here." I gently touched the bruise on the back of her thigh. "Knees sliced up pretty good, got her face again, but I think maybe I did that, trying to pull Kyle out of the hole." And then I added, more to myself then to any of them, "Shouldn't have bothered."

"Anything else?" Doc asked, probing his fingers along her side. She gasped.

When he lifted up Wanda's shirt a little so he could see what was wrong, there was a huge purple bruise covering from her hip to the top of her rib cage.

I sucked in a breath and fought the urge to go back and shoot my brother right now. I had fought with Kyle enough over the years to know where a bruise like that came from. He had hit her. Punched her, hard.

"Let me guess. You fell on a rock." I sounded angrier then I meant to, but it was just too much. My own brother tried to kill this girl, he beat her, and yet she wouldn't accuse him. I wasn't mad at Wanda, but it was frustrating. She should hate him, she should be crying and screaming and telling us to kill this murderer, but she wasn't. I knew she would never do something like that, but... I at least wanted the truth. He was my brother as she said. I needed to know what _my brother_ had done to her.

"Good guess," she breathed. She was trying not to cry out in pain again. Doc was still touching her side and I could see how much it was hurting her. I wished he would stop and just leave her alone, but I knew he was only trying to help her.

"Might have broken a rib, not sure," Doc told her. "I wish I could give you something for the pain ―"

"Don't worry about that, Doc," she said. She was still breathing heavily. "I'm okay. How's Walter? Did he wake up at all?"

"No, it will take some time to sleep that dose off," Doc explained.

It was so like Wanda to be concerned with Walter's health instead of her own. She was almost murdered less than a half hour ago and here she was worrying about a man dying from cancer. I was freaking out enough for the both of us, I guess. I was barely holding it together. I wanted so badly to pull her into my arms and never let go. To take her away from here, this room, these people. Kyle would be here soon and there was no way in hell I was ever letting him near her again.

Doc took Wanda's wrist in his hand and began twisting it slowly, testing it for breaks or fractures.

"I'm okay," she assured him.

"You will be. You'll just have to rest for a while. I'll keep an eye on you. Here, turn your head."

She did as he asked and twisted her head to the side so that he could examine the gash on her face. She winced when he touched it.

"Not here," I murmured.

Doc and Jared looked at me with curious eyes.

"They're bringing Kyle. I'm not having them in the same room," I explained.

"Probably wise," Doc said, nodding.

"I'll get a place ready for her. I'll need you to keep Kyle here until…" Until what? Until we kill my brother? Kick him out? Shoot him? It's all the same. Shooting him just happens to be safer for the rest of us. I didn't want this. Why did Kyle have to go and do something do stupid? "Until we decide what to do with him."

"No, you don't have to―" Wanda began to protest, but I silenced her by putting my fingers to her lips. I couldn't hear it right now. Somehow, her trying to defend Kyle, it just made what he did that much more repugnant. It made the doubt about Kyle's fate go away. I didn't want him dead, no, but I couldn't have him anywhere near Wanda. He'd survived on the outside before, he'd do it again.

"All right. I'll tie him down, if you want," Doc said.

"If we have to. Is it okay to move her?" I asked, glancing at the tunnel. Jeb would be bring Kyle in at any moment and I really didn't want Wanda here when they showed up.

When I looked back at Doc he seemed unsure. He didn't think she should leave, but he didn't want her around Kyle, either. I could see it in his eyes, he was just as anxious as I was. Well, maybe not just as anxious. He wasn't in love with her. He didn't have a battle of emotions going on inside him. He wasn't feeling love and worry and hate and betrayal. _His_ brother hadn't just tried to kill the woman he loved.

"No," Wanda whispered against my fingertips. "Walter. I want to be here for Walter."

"You've saved all the lives you can save today, Wanda," I said to her as gently as I could. She couldn't save Walter as much as she wanted to. He was going to die, soon, most likely. I knew that her species didn't die naturally, so seeing death wasn't a normal occurrence for her. She didn't know how to handle the pain of losing someone she cared about.

"I want to say… to say good―goodbye." She was struggling to say the words. I knew she needed this, needed the closure. I couldn't take her last moments with him away. I just couldn't.

I nodded and looked up at Jared. "Can I trust you?"

Jared's face turned bright red and his jaw clenched tightly. I held one hand up to explain myself, before he had a stroke.

"I don't want to leave her here unprotected while I find her a safe place. I don't know if Kyle will be conscious when he arrives. If Jeb shoots him, it will upset her. But you and Doc should be able to handle him. I don't want Doc to be on his own, and force Jeb's hand."

"Doc won't be on his own," Jared growled.

I still wasn't sure about him, but figured he wouldn't hurt her. I just didn't want him to say anything that might upset her, he had a habit of doing that. "She's been through hell in the past couple of days. Remember that."

Jared still looked angry with me, but nodded once in understanding.

"I'll be here," Doc told me.

"Okay." Then I leaned down over Wanda and looked into her sad, silver eyes. "I'll be back soon. Don't be afraid."

"I'm not," she said bravely.

I did something then, something I didn't remember deciding to do. I leaned down close to her until my lips touched her forehead. I heard Jared gasp and when I pulled back Wanda's mouth was hanging wide open. Then I turned and walked swiftly out of the room.

I got a few feet down the dark tunnel and almost ran directly into Jeb. He had recruited Andy, Aaron, and Wes, and together they were carrying Kyle. Kyle was, thankfully, still unconscious, because if he wasn't I would have beat him to a pulp right then. I didn't stick around to see if my brother was alright, instead I nodded meaningfully at Jeb and made my way to my room, where I began clearing Kyle's things out. He wasn't welcome here anymore. It wasn't his room, it wasn't even _my_ room, anymore. It was now Wanda's room, her safe haven. And I promised myself I'd stand guard outside those red and gray doors for the rest of my life to make sure it stayed that way.

I threw most of Kyle's stuff―the little he had, anyway―into the hall. I was so angry with him, I wanted to smash and destroy everything he had. But as furious as I was with Kyle, I couldn't keep my mind away from other, happier, things.

I couldn't believe I did that. I kissed Wanda. Not on the mouth or anything, but still, I kissed her. My lips tingled, even though it had only been a brief peck on the forehead.

_Jared is going to kill me_, I thought. And then I laughed at myself, because I didn't care. I had almost lost Wanda today. I didn't care what Jared thought. All I cared about was Wanda. Of course, what Wanda thought was an entirely different subject. Maybe she wouldn't think anything of it. Maybe I wouldn't have to tell her how I felt. But then I realized, I _wanted_ to tell Wanda how I felt. I wanted her to know I loved her. I wanted her to love me too. I just needed to figure out how to tell her, how to explain it to her without scaring her. She seemed completely oblivious to my feelings, even though a few other people―mostly Kyle, Doc, and sometimes Jeb―seemed to notice. But then again, there were a few times I had caught her staring at me, looking into my eyes a little longer than was necessary. _Could she..._? Was _she_ feeling this too? How could I ask her something like that, she might not even understand.

I decided it wasn't important at the moment. Right now the most important thing was to make sure she was alright and then to figure out what we were going to do with Kyle.

I picked up all of the things I had thrown into the hallway and brought them to Wes' room. Wes had an extra mattress and, whatever happened at the tribunal, Kyle would never stay in my room again.

By the time I got back to the hospital Wanda was unconscious on the same cot I had laid her down on. There was a shape lying, unmoving, underneath a blanket on one of the other cots. Walter was dead, someone had moved his cot away from Wanda's. And Kyle was unconscious on his own cot.

I rushed over to Wanda, looking up at Doc for an explanation.

"I gave her some morphine for the pain. There was a little left after Walter..." Doc trailed off, looking over towards Walt's covered body.

"Was she okay? With Walter, I mean?" I asked. I never looked up from Wanda's face. Even when she slept she looked sad and alone. I took her hand in mine knowing that she wouldn't realize, but it made me feel better.

"She was alright," Doc whispered. "Just sad, that's all."

"Can I move her? I don't want her here with him." I was practically growling when I motioned to Kyle.

"I wouldn't. Not yet, at least. She's safe here," Doc said.

"Alright," I nodded. I didn't like her being unconscious so close to Kyle, but Doc knew what he was doing and if he said it was better that she be here, than who was I to argue.

I pulled a free cot beside Wanda's and sat there most of the day. Jared barely left the hospital, either. The one time he did leave was to go tell Jamie about what happened. Then, of course, Jamie came running into the hospital. He was almost in tears when he saw Wanda, although, she didn't look too bad. Doc had cleaned away all of the blood. All that was left were a few bruises―and maybe a few broken ribs.

After a while, Jared made him leave. Then it was just me, Jared, Doc, Jeb―who was casually leaning against the door; rifle swung over his shoulder―and Kyle.

Kyle was knocked out most of the day. Jared hit him when he had regained consciousness. I was angry about that. _I_ wanted to be the one to hit him. But I did get another chance. Around noon Kyle started to wake up again.

"Ahhh," Kyle moaned. I was still sitting next to Wanda, holding her hand. But the moment I heard Kyle's voice, I jumped off the cot and turned on him.

His eyes were just beginning to flutter open when I punched him. Hard. I couldn't help myself. I wanted to hurt him and I didn't want to talk to him yet. I might do more than punch him if I had to hear him try to justify his actions.

"Ian. I don't think that was necessary. He has one head wound already―" Doc was saying. But I didn't listen, I just went back over to check on Wanda. It was then I noticed that Jared was standing close enough so that he could see her too. He was still a few feet back, but he was watching her face as she slept, same as me.

I don't know why I felt jealous. I had never felt jealous of Jared before, but something about the way he was looking at her, it made something bubble up inside me. I knew he wasn't looking at _Wanda_, he was looking at _Melanie_, but I still felt like I wanted to tear his head off. I felt like I needed to defend my place in Wanda's life.

This girl was my best friend, I loved her. If Jared decided... What would happen? Would... would Wanda choose him to make Melanie happy? Would she even care that I loved her? Would she be happier with Jared?

I sat there, by her side the rest of the day. I couldn't have left her if I wanted to. My body felt like it was glued to the floor next to her cot.

I thought about everything that had happened. I thought about everything that I had done to Wanda when she first got here and hoped that somehow she had forgiven me for it. I didn't deserve a chance with Wanda, but no one else here did either. They abused her, even now.

I couldn't wait for Wanda to wake up. Now that I knew how I felt about her, I wanted to talk to her. It was frightening and exhilarating all at the same time. Now that I knew what I was looking for, would I be able to tell how she felt about me? Wanda wasn't the hardest person to read. But what if she was disgusted by me? What if she'd rather be with one of her own kind? She was a Soul and I was human. Was that frowned upon? I didn't think it had ever happened before. Wanda and I would be a first. If she wanted that.

I sat there thinking about all of that. But when it came right down to it, only one thing truly mattered. I _loved_ her and I would always be there for her. _Always. Even if she doesn't loves me_, I thought.

Even if she could _never_ love me, I would always protect her.


	13. Funeral

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Thanks so much to everyone who has been reading and reviewing this story. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter! We're almost at 200 reviews :) That's so awesome, you guys!**

**Oh, by the way, if you guys haven't checked out my other stories, you should really give them a chance. One is Kyle's POV from The Host (I just love Kyle, I don't care that he's the world's biggest jerk!). And the other is about how Ian survived the alien invasion. It's completed so you won't have to wait for updates :) Honestly, that one is my favorite. It makes me cry and I'm the one who wrote it! So give them a try. Please!**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 13_

When the sun began to set some of the guys went outside to start digging a grave for Walter. They would get it started and then Jared and I would go out and help them finish up.

Wanda was still unconscious from the morphine Doc had given her. Some of the others didn't want her at Walt's funeral, even though she had spent the last two days, _his_ last two days, trying to comfort him. It wasn't right. None of these people even came to visit Walter and now they refused to let her outside for his burial.

They thought that if we let Wanda outside she'd run away. They thought that she'd memorize the way out and then escape once she was feeling better. I tried to argue with them, tell them that they were being ridiculous, but no one wanted to listen to me. Eventually Doc said that there was enough morphine left to put her out one more time and the others agreed that as long as she was unconscious when we brought her in and out, Wanda would be allowed outside.

That was around the time Kyle woke up.

"Oh, that was a bad idea," Kyle moaned, trying to sit up from his spot on the cot. He immediately lay back down and put his hand to his head.

"What the hell is wrong with you!" I screamed. "I can't believe you would do that! I told you to leave her alone! Didn't I? Did you even listen to anything I said to you? Or are you too stupid to understand simple commands?"

"Ian, _shut up_!" he yelled back. He had his fingers pressed to his temples. I was sure his head was hurting him, but I didn't care. A headache was the least of his worries right now.

"You're lucky I haven't killed you already! She saved your life, you know. She risked her life to save yours, you worthless piece of trash! I should have let you fall into the river. After what you did, you don't deserve to live!"

He looked confused. "What happened? In the river room... with the floor?" he asked.

Was he really going to try to play innocent? I never thought Kyle was a liar, but did he really think we would fall for his act?

"I don't know, Kyle! How about you tell _us_?"

Kyle looked around the room. He looked at Jared, Jeb, Doc, and then Wanda, before turning back to me. "The last thing I remember is the floor cracking."

"After you tried to kill her!" I growled.

"Ian, I have had enough of your―" Kyle snarled right back, but Jeb interrupted him.

"Look here, you two, I don't need any more attempted murders in my home. You understand me?" he said, pointing the gun at the both of us. I nodded and when I looked Kyle was doing the same. Then Jeb continued. "Kyle, there is going to be a tribunal. We'll have to decide what to do with you. Until then you'll be staying here with Doc, ya hear?"

Kyle nodded his head once. He didn't try to argue about the tribunal and I guessed he had accepted his fate when he made the decision to... _kill_ Wanda.

I turned to look at her then. She was sleeping so soundly on the cot, and I was grateful to Doc for giving her the morphine. If she was awake, I was sure she'd be in pain.

I noticed a few strands of hair had fallen across her eyes as she slept. I brushed them away and left my hand on her cheek. She was so beautiful. I couldn't believe that I had met someone like her. I had gone nineteen years without meeting anyone who made me feel the way that Wanda did. And then I spent the next six years just trying to survive, never even imagining that I could feel this way.

I had never been in love. I didn't know it would feel like this. It was like she was everything I had always wanted. This girl, this alien, that came to Earth so that I could meet her. It was like it was destiny. Destiny that Jared founf Melanie, destiny that Melanie was captured and implanted. Destiny that Wanda managed to find her way here to these caves. Out of all the worlds in the universe, Wanda came _here_. She was in Melanie's body and, yes, that was a problem, but we could figure it out.

Jared pulled me out of my reverie when he tapped my arm and motioned for me to follow him. It was time to go outside and help with the grave.

It didn't take long to finish digging the hole in the sandy desert earth. When we were finished I went back inside to get Wanda. A few people, including Kyle, tried to argue against letting her outside, but Jeb silenced them pretty quickly. Jamie helped me carry out a mat for her to lay on outside.

Wanda didn't wake up right away, though. I sat with her while everyone made their way outside. They didn't want to wait until she woke up, they wanted to finish this so that they could go back inside. Finally, I saw her eyes flicker open and she stared up at the night sky.

"Wanda?" I whispered, reaching out to brush my fingers against her cheek. I leaned down so that I could look into her eyes. "Wanda? Are you awake? They won't wait any longer."

"What?" she whispered.

"They're starting already. I knew you would want to be here."

"She comin' around?" Jeb asked. He didn't want to start without Wanda, but the others were beginning to get anxious.

"What's starting?" Wanda asked.

"Walter's funeral," I told her.

She tried to sit up, but I moved my hand to her forehead to hold her down. She twisted her head around to look at the people gathered around the hole we had just dug. Then she tried to sit up again, but again, I wouldn't let her.

"Easy there," I said. "Don't try to stand."

She turned around to face me. "Help me."

"Wanda?" Jamie called, jogging over to us.

"They didn't wait," Jamie told me. "It will be over soon."

"Help me up," Wanda said. Her voice was slightly louder now.

Jamie reached out for her hand, but I shook my head. "I got her."

I pulled her up off the ground, careful to avoid touching the bruises on the back of her thigh and her side.

"What did Doc do to me?" she groaned once I had her in my arms.

"He gave you a little of the leftover morphine, so that he could check you out without hurting you. You needed sleep anyway," I muttered.

She frowned. "Won't someone else need the medicine more?"

I wasn't about to fight with her about her place in the caves. As much as would love to tell her that she was the one who needed the medicine most, we had a funeral to get to. "Shh."

She turned to look at the group gathered around Walter's grave. Trudy was speaking.

"Walter always saw the bright side of things. He could see the bright side of a black hole. I'll miss that." And with that, she threw a handful of sand into the hole and stepped back.

Her husband, Geoffrey, took her place. "He'll find his Gladys now. He's happier where he is."

When he had thrown his handful of dirt, Kyle stepped forward. Wanda began to tremble when she saw him, so I squeezed her tighter to my chest.

"Walter died human. None of us can ask for more than that." Kyle said, throwing his handful of sand into the grave.

Jared went after Kyle. "Walter was good through and through. Not one of us is his equal."

Then Jamie. "Walter was brave. He wasn't afraid to die, he wasn't afraid to live, and… he wasn't afraid to believe. He made his own decisions, and he made good ones."

I smiled at that. Then Jamie walked over to me and Wanda.

"Your turn," he whispered to Wanda.

Andy started walking toward the hole, shovel in hand.

"Wait," Jamie said. "Wanda and Ian haven't said anything."

The group around the grave began muttering.

"Let's have some respect," Jeb ordered.

"Ian, help me get some sand," Wanda said, looking into my eyes.

I bent down so that she could scoop up some sand and then I balanced her on my knee while I got my own handful. I carried her over to the grave and began to speak.

"Walter was the best and brightest of what is human." Then I dropped my sand into the dark hole in the ground. I looked at Wanda and waited for her to take her turn.

She looked at me for a moment, before turning to Walter's grave.

"There was no hatred in your heart," she whispered. "That you existed is proof that we were wrong. We had no right to take your world from you, Walter. I hope your fairytales are true. I hope you find your Gladdie."

How could anyone hate Wanda? She was the kindest, most compassionate person on the planet. I didn't understand how, even now, people were still looking at her like she was the devil. How could she possibly ever deserve that?

I carried her back to the mat, and Doc followed behind me. Wanda was staring at me and it made me a little self-conscious. I was dirty, I knew I was. Did I look that bad? I hadn't thought about what I looked like since before the world ended. I almost laughed when I realized that I wished I could look nicer for her. Or clean, at the very least.

I placed her on the mat and knelt down next to her. Doc did the same.

"How are you feeling?" Doc asked her.

She tried to sit up and I pressed her shoulder to the mat to keep her lying down.

"I'm fine. I think maybe I could walk…" she started to say.

"No need to push it. Let's give that leg a few days, okay?" Doc interrupted her. Then he pulled back her left eyelid and shown a small flashlight into her eye.

I had always found the reflection of their eyes disturbing, scary even. But seeing Wanda's eyes shine was one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen. It wasn't like it was with other Souls, it was incredible.

The reflections danced across Doc's face and he jumped back slightly. "Hmm. That doesn't help a diagnosis, does it? How does your head feel?"

"A little dizzy. I think it's the drugs you gave me, though, not the wound. I don't like them―I'd rather feel the pain, I think."

I frowned and my eyebrows pulled together. We had already agreed...

"What?" she asked.

"I'm going to have to put you under again, Wanda. I'm sorry," Doc said.

"But… why?" Wanda whispered. "I'm really not that hurt. I don't want ―"

I couldn't take her pleading. I cut her off. "We have to take you back inside. We promised… that you wouldn't be conscious."

"Blindfold me again."

Doc took out the syringe. When she saw it, she moved toward me. I should've been protecting her. She didn't want this, but what choice did I have? I held her down again.

"You know the caves too well," Doc explained. "They don't want you having the chance to guess…"

"But where would I go?" she whispered. She was frantic, panicking. "If I knew the way out? Why would I leave now?"

"If it eases their minds…" I started to say as Doc held her wrist.

She looked at me when he gave her the shot. She looked at me like I had betrayed her. And I did, I suppose. We were friends, and I had helped Doc as he injected her with morphine against her will. She was scared and I didn't help her. I had never seen her like that before. The drugs really must have bothered her.

"Sorry," I murmured. And then her eyes closed and she was unconscious again.

I moved my hand from her shoulder to her forehead, brushing her hair back away from her face.

"Are you okay, Ian?" Doc asked. He looked worried.

"We shouldn't have done that to her," I said, gently lifting Wanda into my arms and standing.

He stood, too. "I know. I don't like it anymore than you do, but it was for her own good. You know what they'd do if they thought she could escape."

"What if those drugs hurt her? Besides, you heard her. Why would she escape now? She doesn't _want_ to leave."

"I know that, Ian." He looked a Wanda for a moment before speaking again. "Take her inside. She'll sleep for a few more hours. I didn't give her as much as last time."

Then he bent down to gather the mat and I turned to bring Wanda to her room. When I got there, I kicked the red door out of my way. Wanda wasn't going to wake up anytime soon, and, honestly, I didn't care if I was disturbing anyone else.

I placed her on Kyle's mattress and then went to sit on mine. I couldn't sleep until she woke up. What if something happened? What if she had an adverse effect to the drugs? There was no way I was sleeping.

Jamie came in for a few minutes, before he headed off to bed. He wanted to stay up and watch her, too, but I convinced him to sleep instead. It was Wanda would've wanted me to do.

It felt like forever before she woke up. It was almost dawn when I heard Wanda groan.

"Finally," I whispered. "Hungry?"

She hadn't eaten in over twenty-four hours, I figured she might want something to eat. But I immediately regretted my question when I heard her gag just from the thought of food.

"Oh. Never mind," I said. "Sorry. Again. We had to do it. People got all… paranoid when we took you outside."

"'S okay," she sighed.

"Want some water?"

"No."

She was silent for a moment and then she asked, "Where am I?"

"Your room," I told her.

I could see her looking around the room, although I couldn't see her eyes. It was too dark. But I did feel her fingers brush against mine. I grabbed her hand and held it.

"Whose room is it really?" she asked.

"Yours."

"Ian..."

"It used to be ours―Kyle's and mine," I muttered. "Kyle's being… held in the hospital wing until things can be decided." I hadn't thought about were I would stay. "I can move in with Wes." I figured that was a good enough place. He had already agreed to letting Kyle stay there, and since Jeb was keeping Kyle in the hospital, he would have the space.

"I'm not taking your room. And what do you mean, until things can be decided?"

Well, I wouldn't fight with her about the room now. Not when she'd clearly rather debate what was happening with Kyle. "I told you there would be a tribunal."

"When?"

"Why do you want to know?" I asked.

"Because if you're going through with that, then I have to be there. To explain."

I shook my head. "To lie."

"When?" she demanded.

"First light," I said. "I won't take you."

"Then I'll take myself. I know I'll be able to walk as soon as my head stops spinning," she insisted, stubbornly.

"You would, wouldn't you?" Honestly, for being a peace loving alien, she sure liked to fight. She was stubborn and I knew she wasn't going to give up until she got her way.

"Yes. It's not fair if you don't let me speak."

I sighed and dropped her hand. Slowly, I stood up and stretched. My joints popped. I had been sitting there for a while.

"I'll be back soon. You might not be hungry, but I'm starving." I hadn't eaten since the day before yesterday, either. I had been too worried to eat.

"You had a long night," she stated.

"Yes."

"If it gets light, I won't sit here waiting for you."

I laughed. How ironic that she was as stubborn as Kyle. "I'm sure that's true. So I'll be back before that, and I will help you get where you're going."

I went to the kitchen to get a few rolls―it was to early for anything else―and then picked up an extra for Wanda, just in case she changed her mind. I was just about to go back to my room, when I remembered that we had some of those small individual size bags if chips in the storage area.

If Wanda was nauseated by the thought of food, maybe the salt would ease her stomach a little. That always worked for me when I was a kid. Besides, she deserved something better than just stale bread after everything she'd been through. So I went to the storage area and grabbed a small bag of Cheetos and then went back to check on Wanda.

"Feeling any better?" I asked, moving the door out of my way.

"I think so. I haven't moved my head yet." She was still lying on the mattress. She didn't try to sit up.

"Do you think it's you reacting to the morphine, or Melanie's body?"

"It's Mel. She reacts badly to most painkillers. She found that out when she broke her wrist ten years ago."

_Mel_. She was my only real obstacle. I loved Wanda and every moment I spent with her, I was feeling more and more certain she was feeling something for me, too. The way she looked at me, no one else here did that. Not the way Wanda did. I just had to figure out how to work this relationship with Melanie around.

"It's… odd. Dealing with two people at once," I said.

"Odd," she agreed.

"Are you hungry yet?"

"I thought I smelled bread," she said. I could hear that she was smiling, even though I couldn't see it. "Yes, I think my stomach is past the worst."

"I was hoping you'd say that," I laid down on the floor next to her mattress and handed her the bread.

"Help me up?" she asked.

I wrapped my arm around her waist and pulled her up in one quick motion to avoid causing her too much pain.

"Thanks," she said, a little breathless, and I knew sitting up had still hurt her, even though I tried to be gentle. "Are my ribs broken, then?"

"Doc's not sure. He's doing as much as he can."

"He tries so hard," Wanda whispered.

"He does," I agreed.

"I feel bad… that I used to not like him," she admitted.

I laughed. "Of course you didn't. I'm amazed you can like any of us."

"You've got that turned around," she mumbled, chewing on a price of bread. Then she put the roll down.

"Not very appetizing, I know."

Her shadow shrugged. "Just testing―to see if the nausea's really passed."

"Maybe something more appealing…" I said, opening the bag of Cheetos.

"Cheetos!" she cried. "Really? For me?"

I pulled one out of the bag and touched it to her lips. She bit into it and moaned quietly. "I've been dreaming about this."

I laughed and handed her the bag. I had to remember to bring her more Cheetos in the future.

She finished the rest of the bag and then her roll. I handed her a bottle of water.

"Thank you," she said. "For more than the Cheetos, you know. For so much."

"You're more than welcome, Wanda."

She stared into my eyes, and the way she did it caused goosebumps all over my skin. She was searching. Searching my eyes for something. I wished I knew what she was thinking. Then she turned her face up to the cracks in the ceiling.

It was first light.

"Are you sure you have to do this?" I asked, reaching out to pick her up.

She nodded. "You don't have to carry me. My leg feels better."

"We'll see." I helped her up off the bed, and wrapped my arm around her waist. I pulled her arm around my shoulder. It felt nice being that close to her. "Careful, now. How's that?"

"Great," she lied. "Let's go."

And then I helped Wanda hobble to the game room so that she could try to get my brother off on attempted murder.


	14. Tribunal

**Stephenie Meyer owns The Host.**

**I just want to thank everyone who reviewed. I have really been getting some amazing ones, thank you! And thanks to everyone who has read it as well. Even if you don't review, thanks.**

**This chapter is for 1puppyluv, because she was so... enthusiastic in all of her reviews. Thanks. Anyway, I hope everyone enjoys this chapter. Sorry about the cliffhanger at the end, promise to update soon :)**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 14_

It took us a while to get all the way to the game room. Wanda's leg wasn't healed enough to allow her to walk on her own. Her arm was wrapped around my neck and I held up by the waist.

I have to admit, it felt very nice, being that close to Wanda. Feeling her warm body against mine. It was doing all kinds of things to my head. I kept... thinking about her. I hadn't felt emotions like this since before... well, I don't think I had ever felt anything _this_ strong.

I knew that I was angry about Kyle. I knew that I was about to sentence my brother to death one way or another. But I couldn't think about any of that. The only thing I could focus on was Wanda. Her shirt pulled up slightly to reveal a small fragment of skin just above her waistline. The way it felt when I let my fingers slide to that bare skin.

The only problem was she didn't appear to be reacting to it the way a normal girl would. I remembered the way girls acted when you touched them this way. How they would slide closer or pull away or suck in a quick breath in surprise. She wasn't responding to me in any way.

Maybe she just has other things on her mind. _She _was_ just almost murdered_, I reminded myself. Wanda's indifference to my touch was understandable, she had been through a lot. And if, in fact, she did feel something for me, what's to say how these souls respond to love. Maybe they didn't feel the same physical draw that humans did.

I was alright with that. I hadn't really thought about this possibility, I mean, not that I'd really thought about... _other_ possibilities. I loved Wanda, and if just being friends with her was all I would ever get, than that was more than enough. A few hours ago there was a chance of me not having any relationship with her at all; I would gladly take this one now. I decided to stop thinking about that and concentrate on the tingling sensation in my fingertips and on the back of my neck where her arm was resting.

But as we got closer to the game room, I could hear voices and the anger came back. Wanda wasn't going to testify against Kyle. I knew she wouldn't, she was too stubborn. So when we reached the entrance way to the game room, I came up with a plan.

Wanda was hurt, _badly_. People would see that she was hurt and vote the right way. These were good people despite their fear and prejudices. Just to make sure they got the whole picture, I loosened up on Wanda's waist. She was able to walk, it just made slightly more difficult. She had to hop on her good leg while I maneuvered us to a decent spot on the ground.

Once we were both seated, I looked around. Kyle was sitting in the center of a bright circle of light. Someone had hung the lanterns from the ceiling, but it was still pretty dark in the room. There were no cracks or holes in the ceiling here.

Jared and Doc were standing on either side of Kyle, no doubt guarding him. Jeb was next to Jared and Jamie was next to Jeb. The rest of the people were sitting spread out on the game room floor. Everyone was ready for this to be over.

"Ouch," Trudy whispered, scooting closer to Wanda. Geoffrey and Heath followed her. "You look rotten. How bad are you hurt?"

"I'm fine." Wanda shrugged. Then she turned to look at me. It seemed she had figured out my little plan, but I did my best to look innocent. She didn't buy it, though. She frowned.

A few more people filtered into the room. Wes and Lily came to sit by Wanda. Then finally Aaron came in.

"That's everybody. Lucina's staying with her kids. She doesn't want them here―she said to go on without her," he told Jeb, then went to sit by Andy.

"Okay, then," Jeb said. "Here's how it's gonna work. Straight-up majority vote. As usual, I'll make my own decision if I have a problem with the majority, 'cause this ―"

"Is my house," everyone laughed, but stopped quickly.

"Who's speaking against Kyle?" Jeb asked.

I started to get up, but Wanda grabbed at my elbow.

"No!" she whispered. I pulled away from her and stood.

"This is simple enough," I said. "My brother was warned. He was not in any doubt about Jeb's ruling on this. Wanda is one of our community―the same rules and protections apply to her as to any of us. Jeb told Kyle point-blank that if he couldn't live with her here, he should move on. Kyle decided to stay. He knew then and he knows now the penalty for murder in this place."

"It's still alive," Kyle snorted.

"Which is why I'm not asking for your death," I barked. "But you can't live here anymore. Not if you're a murderer at heart."

I stared at Kyle for a minute before sitting back down.

My brother. He... He tried to _kill_ her. My own brother. How could he do this to me? I knew how he felt about her, but _he_ knew how _I_ felt about her. He realized it before I did. How could he? If he _knew_, how could he do that to me?

"But he could get caught, and we'd have no idea," Brandt protested. "He'll lead them back here, and we'd have no warning."

There was a loud murmur going through the room. No one wanted that to happen.

They had all been afraid of _Wanda_ giving us up to the Seekers. That undeserved fear was the reason we were in this situation. And now _Kyle_ was the one they feared would reveal our location to the Seekers in the end. I wondered if anyone else could see the irony of it. Their worst fears brought about by their own abhorrence and suspicion.

"They'll never get me alive." Kyle glowered at Brandt.

"Then it's a death sentence after all," someone called out. I couldn't see who it was.

"You can't guarantee that." That was Andy.

"One at a time," Jeb warned before the comments got out of control.

"I've survived on the outside before," Kyle seethed.

"It's a risk," someone said.

"What did Kyle do wrong? Nothing." I wished I knew who said that.

Jeb took a step toward the crowd, toward the voice. "My rules."

"She's not one of us," another voice called.

I began to stand. This tribunal was beginning to take a dangerous turn and I was going to stop it.

"Hey!"

I jumped a little at the loud voice echoing through the cave. Jared's voice.

"Wanda's not on trial here!" he shouted. "Does someone have a concrete complaint against her―against Wanda herself? Then ask for another tribunal. But we all know she hasn't harmed anyone here. In fact, she saved his life." Jared pointed at Kyle, who hunched his shoulders. I guess he didn't like the idea of a parasite saving his life. "Just seconds after he tried to throw her into the river, she risked her life to keep him from the same painful death. She had to know that if she let him fall she would be safer here. She saved him anyway. Would any of you have done the same―rescue your enemy? He tried to kill her, and yet will she even speak against him?"

Everyone, including me, looked at Wanda. She didn't seem to like all the attention.

"_Will_ you speak against him, Wanda?" Jared asked, extending his hand toward her.

I looked back at Wanda. Her eyes were wide, like she was shocked that Jared was speaking to her.

"This is all a misunderstanding," she whispered. "We both fell when the floor caved in. Nothing else happened."

I could hear the lie in her voice and started laughing. It was funny to me, the fact that she couldn't lie. Wanda elbowed me, but I kept laughing.

Jared smiled. "You see. She even tries to lie in his defense."

"_Tries_ being the operative word," I mumbled.

"Who says it's lying? Who can prove that?" Maggie asked as she stepped closer to Kyle. "Who can prove that it's not the truth that sounds so false on its lips?"

I rolled my eyes. This was ridiculous. How could she try to deny the truth? She knew what Kyle had done, they all did.

"Mag―" Jeb began.

"Shut up, Jebediah―I'm speaking. There is no reason for us to be here. No human was attacked. The insidious trespasser offers no complaint. This is a waste of all our time."

"I second that," Sharon called out.

Trudy jumped up next to us. "We can't house a murderer―and just wait around for him to be successful!"

"_Murder_ is a subjective term," Maggie spit. "I only consider it murder when something human is killed."

I looked at Wanda. I figured she would be scared and I was right. She was trembling. I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and pulled her close to my side. She was safe here. Safe with me. I wanted her to know that.

"_Human_ is a subjective term as well, Magnolia," Jared said. "I thought the definition embraced some compassion, some little bit of mercy."

"Let's vote," Sharon said quickly. "Raise your hand if you think Kyle should be allowed to stay here, with no penalty for the… misunderstanding." She looked at me then. Not at Wanda beside me. Could she really not bring herself to look at Wanda? I could understand that she was angry about Melanie, but she should be over it by now. Melanie was _still here_. Shouldn't she be angry at Kyle for almost killing her cousin?

Hands began to raise throughout the room. Even Wanda tried to raise hers, but I held her tighter to me. I refused to let her vote to save my brother. He didn't deserve it.

"Ten… fifteen… twenty… twenty-three," Jeb counted. "Okay, that's a clear majority."

I stared at Jeb, expecting him to overrule the majority. He had to. He knew what Kyle did and he had warned him...

Jamie walked over to us then. He squeezed in beside Wanda on her other side and put his arm around her, under mine.

"Maybe your souls were right about us," he said angrily. "The majority are no better than ―"

"Hush!" Wanda interrupted him.

"Okay," Jeb said, quieting everyone. He looked at Kyle, then at Wanda, and then at Jared. "Okay, I'm inclined to go with the majority on this."

"Jeb―" I started to argue and then realized Jared was protesting, too.

"My house, my rules," Jeb told us. "Never forget that. So you listen to me, Kyle. And you'd better listen, too, I think, Magnolia. Anyone who tries to hurt Wanda again will not get a tribunal, they will get a burial." Then he slapped the butt of his rifle.

Wanda flinched beside me. Of course she would. She hated violence. Especially, it seemed, when it was done in her name.

Kyle nodded, agreeing to Jeb's terms. But the question was, would he listen this time? He hadn't been sent away, and as angry as that made me, I was also slightly relieved. I hated that I felt relief for Kyle. It seemed wrong somehow, after what he'd done to Wanda. After what he tried to do. It felt like a betrayal to her to care that my brother wasn't killed today.

"Tribunal's over," Jeb announced, and then his voice seemed lighter. "Who's up for a game?"

_A game? _I couldn't believe he wanted to play a game now. Wanda looked at Jamie and he pursed his lips.

"Jeb's just trying to get things back to normal. It's been a bad couple of days. Burying Walter…"

Jared walked past us and out of the cavern.

"Jared got a new ball?" someone asked.

"Cool," Wes murmured.

"Playing games." Trudy shook her head.

"If it eases the tension." Lily shrugged. And she was right. The tension in the room had dissipated, replaced by excitement. Everyone wanted to play.

I heard Aaron teasing Kyle, but I tuned it out. I didn't really feel like thinking about my brother right now, much less playing soccer with him.

"I nominate Andy for captain," someone shouted.

"I nominate Lily," Wes called. I couldn't help but to smirk at that. He had always had a crush on her.

"Andy and Lily."

"Yeah, Andy and Lily."

"I want Kyle," Andy said.

"Then I get Ian," Lily countered. I wasn't going to start an argument about it, but I wasn't going to play. I really didn't want to be anywhere near Kyle right now and I'd rather hang out with Wanda anyway.

Andy and Lily continued to call names until everyone was divided into two even teams. But then Jared came back with the ball and Lucina her two kids followed.

Lily looked down at Wanda. "Wanda?" she asked.

Wanda shook her head and pointed at her leg.

"Right. Sorry," Lily apologized.

"I think I'll sit this one out," I told her. Besides it would even up the teams.

"No. They've got Kyle and Jared. We're dead without you," Wes complained.

"Play," Wanda told me. "I'll... I'll keep score."

I looked down at her. "I'm not really in the mood for playing a game."

"They need you," she pleaded.

I snorted. She didn't want me sitting on the sidelines with her. She wanted me to play and have fun. _Not likely_, I thought.

"C'mon, Ian," Jamie pressed.

"I want to watch," Wanda said. "But it will be… boring if one team has too much advantage."

"Wanda," I sighed. "You really are the worst liar I've ever met." But I got up and started to stretch with Wes.

After a minute or two, Jamie came over with the ball. He was bouncing it off of his head. I grabbed the ball and showed him how the pro's did it. Then Wes tried and ended up smacking himself in the nose.

We were laughing and kicking the ball between us for a few minutes, and then I remembered Wanda. I had left her sitting in the middle of the floor. But when I turned around she wasn't there anymore. I looked, frantically, around for her, before finally spotting her. She was sitting in the entrance to the game room, and she wasn't alone.

Jared sat beside. They were talking.

I swallowed a little too hard. I was jealous again. Why did I agree to play?

Wanda looked over at me then. She smiled, but I couldn't bring myself to smile back; I took a deep breath. I was fighting the urge to rush over there. I didn't know what I'd do when I got there, but I definitely didn't like their cozy appearance. I was glad Jared didn't want to hurt her anymore, but what _did_ he want?

Kyle was the one that pried Jared away from Wanda. Jared was on his team and he wanted to play.

Jared and Kyle's team was winning when we broke for halftime. Trudy and Paige had brought granola bars for everyone, seeing as no one had had breakfast today. I grabbed a few extra for Wanda.

"Here you go…" I said walking up to Wanda and Jamie.

"Beat ya," Jamie smiled, holding out two hands full of granola bars.

"Oh," Jared said, walking up on the other side of Jamie. He had also brought a few for Wanda.

I stared at him for a minute and he stared right back. We were trying to figure each other out. Well, _I_ was trying to figure _him_ out, I guessed he already had a good idea of what I was thinking after I kissed Wanda in the hospital yesterday morning.

"Where's all the food?" Kyle yelled, breaking our staring contest.

"Catch," Jared said. He threw his granola bars at Kyle, who caught them and then strode over toward us looking for more.

"Here," I said, shoving a few of my bars at him. I didn't bother to look in his direction. I didn't want to see him. "Now go."

Kyle ignored me, though, and when I glanced up, he was looking at Wanda. She shrunk away from him and sucked in a harsh breath. I jumped in front of her and Jared did the same.

"You heard him," Jared said.

"Can I say something first?" Kyle asked, still looking down at Wanda.

"I'm not sorry," he said when we didn't reply. "I still think it was the right thing to do."

I shoved him away, but he stepped forward again.

"Hold on, I'm not done."

"Yeah, you are," Jared growled.

"No, I'm not." Kyle held his hands up. He was surrendering; he wasn't here to start a fight. "I don't think I was wrong, but you did save my life. I don't know why, but you did. So I figure, a life for a life. I won't kill you. I'll pay the debt that way."

"You stupid jackass," I spit.

"Who's got the crush on a worm, bro? You gonna call _me_ stupid?"

I leaned forward, ready to lunge at him. I couldn't believe he had just said that, in front of Wanda, in front of everyone.

"I'll tell you why," Wanda spoke up from behind us. We all turned around to look at her. She looked nervous.

She cleared her throat. "I didn't let you fall because… because I'm not _like_ you. I'm not saying that I'm not… like humans. Because there are others here who would do the same. There are kind and good people here. People like your brother, and Jeb, and Doc… I'm saying that I'm not like you personally."

Kyle stared at her for a minute and then laughed. "Ouch." Then he turned away and walked back to get some water, calling over his shoulder, "Life for a life."

We started playing again soon after that. When I was placed on Kyle's team I was sure I would quit. I didn't want to ruin the game for everyone, but I didn't want to be in the same room as Kyle, let alone the same team.

After a few minutes, though, it didn't matter. I forgot about everything and concentrated on the game. Kyle and I were always good at this. Sports. We had always been on all of the school teams together. We were good separately, but together... we were nearly unstoppable.

We easily demolished the other team, even when they took all of our best players. It wasn't long before Jeb called the game.

"Okay, okay," Jeb said, catching the ball under his arm. "I think we all know the winners. Now, I hate to be a party pooper, but there's work waiting… and, to be honest, I'm bushed."

There were a few moans and complaints, but mostly people seemed to agree with Jeb.

Kyle raised his hand looking for a high five, but I walked past, ignoring him. He caught my shoulder and spun me around. When I smacked his hand away he threw a light punch at my stomach. I dodged it and Kyle gave me a noogie. He was laughing. I smacked his hand away again, but semi-smiled. I knew he was just trying to apologize in his own way. Of course, Kyle could never actually _say_ the words "I'm sorry".

"Good game, bro," Kyle said. "You've still got it."

"You're such an idiot, Kyle."

"You got the brains; I got the looks. Seems fair," he smirked.

He threw another punch at me and I grabbed it, twisting him into a headlock. Kyle was laughing and swearing. _I_ was laughing. This morning I was certain this would never happen again. Certain I could never look at Kyle the same way after this, but now it was like it used to be. Kyle and I hadn't joked around like this since before Wanda arrived. I realized I was happy Kyle got to stay. Not just relieved that my brother hadn't been sent to his death out in the real world, but actually _happy_ that I got to keep Kyle and Wanda. I still didn't trust him around her, but I would watch her, keep her safe. Better than I had the last time.

I let go of Kyle and turned to look at Wanda. What I saw didn't surprise me, but I can't say I was happy about it. Wanda was standing in the entrance way holding onto Jared's hand for support.

"Better get over there before your he steals your girl," Kyle said.

I turned to look at him. I never knew what was going on in Kyle's head. Now he suddenly cared how I felt about Wanda, when yesterday he had tried to murder her? He laughed at my expression. I left Kyle laughing, I had more important things to take care of.

I walked over to Wanda and Jared. "I'll get her where she needs to go," I said, wrapping my arm around Wanda. Jared's face turned into the flat mask it always did when he didn't want to show his emotions.

"We were just discussing where exactly that would be. She's tired. Maybe the hospital… ?" Jared asked.

I shook my head and saw Wanda doing the same. No way she wanted to be anywhere near the hospital after everything with Walter.

"I've got a better place for her," I said. "Those cots aren't much softer than rock, and she's got a lot of sore spots."

"Why don't you get lunch?" Jared suggested. He was still holding Wanda's hand. "You look hungry. I'll take her wherever you had planned… ?"

I laughed, it came out a little harsher than I'd meant it to. "I'm fine. And honestly, Jared, Wanda needs a bit more help than a hand. I don't know if you're… comfortable enough with the situation to give her that. You see ―" I bent down and picked Wanda up. "―she's actually had enough exercise for one day, I think. You go on ahead to the kitchen."

"I can carry her," Jared said after a couple of seconds.

"Can you?" I questioned, holding Wanda out to him. He looked at her for a minute and then sighed, dropping her hand. I smiled.

"I think I'll tag along," Jared said as I walked to the exit. "There's something I want to discuss with you."

"Suit yourself."

Jared didn't speak again until we were in the main plaza. Alone.

"What's your take on Kyle?"

I snorted. "He prides himself on being a man of his word. Usually, I would trust a promise from him. In this situation… I'm not letting her out of my sight."

"Good."

"It will be fine, Ian," Wanda said. "I'm not afraid."

"You don't have to be," I told her. "I promise―no one is ever going to do something like this to you again. You _will_ be safe here."

She stared back at me, stared right into my eyes. I couldn't look away, I loved it when she did that.

"Yes. You will," Jared said.

Wanda turned to look at him and I rolled my eyes. He just had to go interrupting things, didn't he?

"Thanks," she whispered.

We didn't talk anymore until we reached my room, _Wanda's_ room.

"Would you mind getting that?" I asked Jared, nodding to the doors. When Jared didn't move the door out of the way, I turned to look at him.

"Your room? This is your better place?" he asked skeptically.

"It's her room now."

"Where's Kyle staying?"

"With Wes, for now."

"And you?"

"I'm not exactly sure," I admitted.

He looked at me, trying to figure something else out, some other scenario than her sleeping in my room. He clearly didn't want me around her.

"Ian, this is ―" Wanda started to say.

"Oh," I interrupted her. "You're exhausted, aren't you? Jared, could you get the door, please?"

Jared wrenched the red door out of the way as I carried Wanda into the room. I placed her on the mattress to the right, Kyle's mattress. Her mattress, now. I straightened her bad leg and then made sure the pillow was comfortably under her head.

"That okay?" I checked.

"Yes."

"You look tired."

"I shouldn't be―I've done nothing but sleep lately," she muttered.

"Your body needs sleep to heal," I told her, and she nodded. "I'll bring you food later―don't worry about anything."

"Thank you. Ian?"

"Yeah?"

"This is your room," she mumbled, half asleep already. "You'll sleep here, of course."

"You don't mind?"

"Why would I?"

I knew Wanda was just being friendly. It didn't mean the same thing to her that it would to a human. I knew that, but I still felt like I had just won the lottery on the inside. Especially, since Jared was standing outside listening. "It's probably a good idea―best way to keep an eye on you. Get some sleep."

"Okay," she mumbled. Her eyes were closed now.

I patted her hand and then went back outside to talk to Jared.

"Do you think what happened this morning will influence Aaron or Brandt?" I whispered.

"You mean Kyle getting a bye?" he asked.

"Yeah. They didn't have to… _do_ anything before. Not when it looked so likely that Kyle would do it for them."

Jared nodded. "I see your point. I'll speak to them."

"You think that will be enough?"

"I've saved both their lives. They owe me. If I ask them for something, they'll do it."

"You'd bet her life on that?"

"We'll keep an eye on her," Jared said after a few seconds.

I leaned against the wall. Jared didn't speak right away, though, I was sure he still had something on his mind.

"Aren't you going to go eat?" Jared asked.

"I think I'll hang out here for a bit.… How about you?"

Jared didn't answer me, but he had that mask on again.

"What?" I asked. "Is there something you want to say to me, Jared?"

"The girl in there…" he said slowly.

"Yes?"

"That body doesn't belong to her."

"Your point?"

"Keep your hands off it." He glared at me.

"Jealous, Howe?" I laughed.

"That's not really the issue."

"Really," I said sarcastically.

"Wanda seems to be, more or less, cooperating with Melanie. It sounds like they're almost… on friendly terms. But obviously Wanda's making the decisions. What if it were you? How would you feel if you were Melanie? What if you were the one… invaded that way? What if you were trapped, and someone else was telling your body what to do? If you couldn't speak for yourself? Wouldn't you want your wishes―as much as they could be known―respected? At the very least by other humans?"

"Okay, okay. Point taken. I'll keep that in mind."

"What do you mean, you'll _keep that in mind_?" Jared growled.

"I mean that I'll think about it."

"There's nothing to think about," Jared said. His jaw was clenched. "The body and the person locked inside it belong to me."

"You're sure that Melanie still feels the ―"

"Melanie will always be mine. And I will always be hers," Jared cut me off.

I could understand where he was coming from. He loved Melanie. But I didn't _want_ Melanie, I wanted Wanda. It wasn't her fault that we were stuck in this impossible situation. She deserved to live her own life separate from Melanie, even if she couldn't ever actually _be_ separate from Melanie.

"But what if it were you?" I whispered. "What if you were stuffed in a human body and let loose on this planet, only to find yourself lost among your own kind? What if you were such a good… person that you tried to save the life you'd taken, that you almost died trying to get her back to her family? What if you then found yourself surrounded by violent aliens who hated you and hurt you and tried to murder you, over and _over_ again?" My voice broke. I hated to think about what we had done to her, what _I_ had done to her. "What if you just kept doing whatever you could to save and heal these people despite that? Wouldn't you deserve a life, too? Wouldn't you have earned that much?"

He didn't speak right away.

"Point taken?" I asked.

"I―I'll have to think about that one."

"Do that," I said.

He pursed his lips. "But still ―"

I sighed. "Don't get worked up. Wanda isn't exactly human, despite the body. She doesn't seem to respond to… physical contact the same way a human would."

Jared laughed. "Is that your theory?"

"What's funny?"

"She is quite capable of responding to physical contact. She's human enough for that. Or her body is, anyway." He wasn't laughing anymore.

My jaw clenched and my hand curled into a fist, but I didn't seem to be in control of it at the moment.

"Jealous, O'Shea?" Jared teased.

"Actually… I am. Surprisingly so. How would you know that?"

He hesitated. "It was… sort of an experiment."

"An _experiment_?" I asked. What did he do to her?

"It didn't go the way I thought it would. Mel punched me." He was grinning from ear to ear.

I was stunned. "Melanie... punched... you?"

"It sure wasn't Wanda. You should have seen her face.…" He trailed off when he saw _my_ face. I turned bright red. I was surprised I hadn't hit him already for being so callous. How could he do that to her?

"What? Hey, Ian, easy, man!" Jared held his hands up in front of him, much the same way Kyle had earlier, in surrender. Or protecting himself? I wasn't sure at the moment.

"Did you think for one moment what that must have done to her?" I hissed.

"Mel?"

"No, you fool, Wanda!"

"Done to _Wanda_?" He asked, confused.

I wasn't sure what I was angrier about. The fact that he had done something to Wanda―an _experiment_, as he put it―or that he couldn't comprehend how that would make her feel?

"Oh, get out of here. Go eat something. Stay away from me for a few hours," I said, turning and going back into my room. I didn't wait for his answer, I just closed the door in his face.

When I turned back around, Wanda was staring at me. I _thought_ she had been sleeping. I was wrong. Had she heard everything we said?

Of course she heard it. The look on her face was enough to assure me of that.

"I guess we weren't as quiet as I thought," I said after waiting a minute for Jared to leave. He was always so quiet, I couldn't hear him walk away, but I didn't think Jared was the kind of person who would stand outside the door eavesdropping.

"Sound carries in these caves," Wanda whispered.

I nodded. We needed to talk about this. I _wanted_ to talk to her about this, even if I was scared of her reaction. What if she didn't feel the same way? What if she thought I was disgusting, repugnant? I _had_ tried to kill her. I could go on for days thinking of why she wouldn't want me, why she _shouldn't_ want me, but I wanted to know how _she_ felt. "So… What do you think?" I asked, hoping for the best.


	15. Heart to Heart

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**2/15/10**

**Okay, I added a little more to the end of this chapter after I originally posted it last night. So if you've already read it you might want to check out the end again.**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 15_

"What do I think about what?" Wanda asked. She was lying on the bed, still in the same position I had left her in.

"About our… discussion out there," I explained.

She was quiet for a minute. No doubt, thinking it over. I was holding my breath.

"I really don't know," she finally admitted.

"That's understandable." At least she hadn't said no. She was thinking about it. She just needed time.

"Only because you are very understanding," she sighed.

I smiled and she stared into my eyes. We were alone, just me and Wanda. I couldn't ask for a more perfect moment. "I like you very much, Wanda."

"I'm only just beginning to see that. I guess I'm a little slow."

"It's a surprise to me, too."

I had never meant for any of this to happen. I wouldn't change it for the world. Literally. I loved Wanda, but if someone were to tell me that I would be right here at this very moment, I would've said they were a nut. This hadn't been my plan, my plan had simply been to keep her safe, to make up for what I had done to her. But now, looking back, I couldn't see any other outcome. All roads would've led here eventually.

I looked at Wanda and pursed my lips. "And… I suppose… that is one of the things you don't know how you feel about?"

"No. I mean yes, I… don't know. I… I ―" she stuttered.

"That's okay," I interrupted, not wanting her to worry so much about it. She didn't need to come up with any excuse, I didn't mind letting her think about it. "You haven't had long to think about it. And it must seem… strange."

"Yes," Wanda nodded. "More than strange. Impossible."

We were both quiet for a minute.

"Tell me something," I finally said.

"If I know the answer," she said quietly.

"It's not a hard question." I reached over, taking her hand in both of mine.

I slowly trailed my fingers up her arm, all the way to her shoulder. Goose bumps were forming where my fingers touched her bare skin. My heart was pounding. I pulled my fingers back down to her wrist and then started all over again.

"Does that feel good or bad to you?" I asked her.

She thought about it for a few seconds. Her eyes had a faraway look in them. Then she shivered, slightly.

"Wanda?" I asked.

She wouldn't look me in the eyes. "Mel says bad."

"What do you say?"

"I say… I don't know."

When Wanda finally did look up, I met her gaze and smiled warmly. "I can't even imagine how confusing this all must be to you."

"Yes. I'm confused," she whispered.

"Would you like me to stop?" I asked, still tracing the length of her arm.

She hesitated. "Yes. That… what you're doing… makes it hard for me to think. And Melanie is… angry at me. That also makes it hard to think."

I leaned back and crossed my arms in front of my chest. "I don't suppose she'd give us a minute alone?"

Wanda laughed. "I doubt it."

I tilted my head to the side. Maybe if I asked nicely...?

"Melanie Stryder?" I asked.

Wanda seemed a little startled that I was speaking to Melanie.

"I'd like the chance to speak with Wanda privately, if you don't mind. Is there any way that could be arranged?"

Wanda's nose wrinkled up. Melanie must have said something she didn't like.

"What did she say?" I asked.

"She said no. And that she doesn't… like you."

I laughed. "I can respect that. I can respect her. Well, it was worth a try." I sighed. "Kind of puts a damper on things, having an audience."

I saw her make a face then, but I knew it was because of Melanie. She had every right not to like me. It was her body. Wanda was in control, but Melanie was the owner. I could understand why she wouldn't like me. I just hoped Wanda did.

I put my hand on her face. "I'll let you think about things, okay? So you can decide how you feel."

"It might take a while. None of this makes any sense, you know," Wanda said.

I smiled at her. "I know."

At least she was going to give me a chance. That was all I could ask for.

"You don't really feel that way about me, you know," she whispered. "It's this body.… She's pretty, isn't she?"

I nodded. "She is. Melanie is a very pretty girl. Even beautiful." I moved my hand to her scarred cheek and gently brushed my fingers against the rough skin. "In spite of what I've done to her face."

I brushed the hair out of her face. "But, pretty as she is, she's a stranger to me. She's not the one I… care about."

I couldn't tell her I loved her. Not yet. After she had some time to think about it...

"Ian, you don't… Nobody here separates us the way they should. Not you, not Jamie, not Jeb." Her words were rushed and she seemed a little angry. "You couldn't care about me. If you could hold me in your hand, me, you would be disgusted. You would throw me to the ground and grind me under your foot."

My eyebrows pulled together. "I…" I had found souls disgusting, but since I met Wanda that had changed. "Not if I knew it was you."

She laughed, but there was no amusement in it. "How would you know? You couldn't tell us apart."

I frowned. She was right. They were all the same, they all looked the same. But Wanda was different. She wasn't like the rest. I knew her, she was caring, compassionate, loving.

"It's just the body," she said.

"That's not true at all. It's not the face, but the expressions on it. It's not the voice, but what you say. It's not how you look in that body, but the things you do with it. You are beautiful."

I kneeled on the floor besides her mattress and took her hand in both of mine. "I've never known anyone like you."

I had never been in love. Not really. It had always been a crush or infatuation or sometimes just lust, but I loved Wanda with my whole heart and soul. It wasn't her body, but her mind. It was Melanie's body but the mind, that was all Wanda. When she spoke I knew it was Wanda that I was hearing, even if it was Melanie's voice that said the words. I knew it wasn't Melanie that I wanted, because if she had shown up here without Wanda, I was sure that I wouldn't have felt anything for her. I had a feeling that Melanie and Wanda were two thoroughly different people, even though they shared a body.

Wanda sighed. "Ian, what if I'd come here in Magnolia's body?"

I cringed. That wasn't something I wanted to picture, but I understood her point. "Okay. That's a good question. I don't know."

Would I want her if―

"Or Wes's?" she added.

"But you're female―you yourself are." Doc had told me that. She had been explaining the souls... reproduction process to Wes while I was clearing Kyle's things out of our room.

"And I always request whatever a planet's equivalent is. It seems more… right. But I could be put into a man and I would function just fine."

"But you're not in a man's body."

"See? That's my point," she said. "Body and soul. Two different things, in my case."

"I wouldn't want it without you."

"You wouldn't want me without it. "

I touched her cheek and left my hand there. We could play what if forever, but the point was, she was in this body and that wasn't about to change. "But this body is part of you, too. It's part of who you are. And, unless you change your mind and turn us all in, it's who you will always be."

She didn't answer me. She just sat there with that faraway look in her eyes again.

"Another internal conversation?" I asked.

"We're thinking of our mortality."

"You could live forever if you left us." That made me sad.

This girl gave up her life, her future, to bring Melanie back to her family. She would die here with the rest of us, and for what? So we could beat her and hate her for the rest of her life? It might have been the right thing for Her to do, to bring Melanie back, but it was grossly unfair to Wanda.

"Yes, I could." She sighed. "You know, humans have the shortest life span of any species I've ever been, except the Spiders. You have so little time."

"Don't you think, then…" I said, leaning closer to her. All I could see were those beautiful silver eyes―they shined slightly from the sunlight filtering through the cracks in the ceiling. "That maybe you should make the most of what time you have? That you should live while you're alive?"

I leaned even closer and touched my lips to hers, lightly. Her lips were so soft and her breath warmed my face.

My heart was pounding in my ears and every muscle in my body tensed. I had to be careful or I might go farther then I meant to. It had been so long since I felt this way. I brushed my lips back and forth against hers.

"Good or bad?" I whispered against her lips.

"I―I can't think," she breathed, as I moved my lips with hers.

"That sounds… good."

I pressed my lips down harder against hers. I took her lower lip between mine and sucked on it gently.

"Please," she whispered.

"Yes?"

"Please stop. I can't think. Please."

I sat back immediately. I didn't want to force anything on her. "Okay."

Wanda pressed her hands to her head. I guess Melanie wasn't to pleased.

"Well, at least nobody punched me." I grinned.

"She wanted to do more than that," she told me. "Ugh. I don't like it when she's mad. It hurts my head. Anger is so… ugly."

"Why didn't she?" I asked curiously.

"Because I didn't lose control. She only breaks free when I'm… overwhelmed."

I watched as ahe continued to press her fingers to her forehead. She, once again, had that faraway look in her eyes.

"She's talking to you."

"Yelling at me," she corrected.

"I can tell now," I murmured. "I can see you concentrate on the conversation. I never noticed before today."

"She's not always this vocal," Wanda explained.

"I am sorry, Melanie," I said. "I know this must be impossible for you."

Wanda cringed.

I grimaced, but couldn't help a small smile. I hated seeing Wanda upset, but I had to appreciate the fact that Melanie was still so... present inside her body. It was comforting to know that that was possible. "She doesn't accept."

She nodded.

"So she can break free? If you're overwhelmed?"

Wanda shrugged. "Sometimes, if she takes me by surprise and I'm too… emotional. Emotion makes it hard to concentrate. But it's been more difficult for her lately. It's like the door between us is locked. I don't know why. I tried to let her out when Kyle ―" She stopped aruptly, her mouth shuting with an audible snap.

"When Kyle tried to kill you," I finished for her. "You wanted her free? Why?"

She stared at me without saying a word.

"To fight him?" I asked.

She still didn't answer me.

I sighed. "Okay. Don't tell me." Then i changed the subject. "Why do you think the… door is locked?"

She frowned. "I don't know. Maybe the time passing… It worries us."

"But she broke through before, to punch Jared."

"Yes." She shivered at the memory.

"Because you were overwhelmed and emotional?"

"Yes."

"What did he do? Just kiss you?"

She nodded. I flinched. Jared... overwhelmed her. He made Wanda... emotional.

"What?" she asked. "What's wrong?"

"When Jared kisses you, you are… overwhelmed by emotion," I explained.

She looked at me with concern clear in her eyes.

I sighed. "And when I kiss you… you aren't sure if you like it. You are not… overwhelmed."

"Oh," Wanda breathed. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I told you I'd give you time, and I don't mind waiting for you to think things through. I don't mind that at all."

"What do you mind?"

I took a breath. "I saw how you loved Jamie. That was always really obvious. I guess I should have seen that you loved Jared, too. Maybe I didn't want to. It makes sense. You came here for the two of them. You love them both, the same way Melanie did. Jamie like a brother. And Jared…"

I wasn't looking at her. I was staring at the wall behind her. There was a very interesting crack in it that I had never noticed before.

"How much of that is Melanie?" I asked.

"I don't know. Does it matter?"

"Yes. It does to me," I whispered, taking her hand.

I hadn't realized she loved him. It made my stomach twist in knots and I couldn't think straight. Wanda loved Jared. And even if it was only Melanie's feelings being transfered over, I still didn't like it.

She loved him. I couldn't wrap my head around it. He had been such a jerk to her since she got here. He had hurt her over and over again. I suppose, though, he had never tried to kill her.

But she cared about me, right? She was going to think about it, think about me. Wanda knew how I felt and we had kissed. She wasn't disgusted by me, she just didn't want to make Melanie angry. She had promised to think this through, and that was all I wanted. A chance. And we'd have plenty of time for chances here in the caves.

I laughed. "Time is on my side," I smiled. "We've got the rest of our lives in here. One day you'll wonder what you ever saw in Jared."

Wanda laughed. She sounded relieved that I wasn't unhappy.

"Wanda? Wanda, can I come in?" Jamie's voice called from outside the door.

"Of course, Jamie." Wanda smiled, already reaching for him as he opened the door.

"Hey, Wanda! Hey, Ian!" Jamie said, heading for Wanda. I was still sitting on the floor next to Wanda's mattress and was now in Jamie's way, but I wasn't about to move, not even for the kid. He sat at the end of her mattress and patted her foot. "How are you feeling?" he asked.

"Better," Wanda said.

"Hungry yet? There's beef jerky and corn on the cob! I could get you some."

"I'm okay for now. How are you? I haven't seen you much lately."

Jamie frowned. "Sharon gave me detention."

Wanda smiled. "What did you do?"

I smiled too. It was almost as if Jamie were _Wanda's_ brother. I know, technically, he was, but her kind didn't really have siblings. She had grown to love and care about him, a complete stranger. It was sweet, but it made me wonder. Did Wanda love _them_, Jamie and Jared, just because of Melanie? She was alien, was it possible for _her_ to develop her own wants and needs? Could she ever really be separate from Melanie?

"Nothing. I was totally framed. Guess what?" He changed the subject. "Jared was saying at lunch that he didn't think it was fair for you to have to move out of the room you were used to. He said we weren't being good hosts. He said you should move back in with me! Isn't that great? I asked him if I could tell you right away, and he said that was a good idea. He said you would be in here."

"I'll bet he did," I mumbled to myself, stifling a growl.

"So what do you think, Wanda? We get to be roomies again!" Jamie crowed.

"But Jamie, where will Jared stay?" Wanda asked.

_Of course, we know where Jared will stay_, I thought sarcastically. After kissing Wanda I wasn't sure anything could bring me down, but now my good mood was fading, fast. Jared _would_ play on Wanda's feelings for him and the kid to get what he wanted.

"Wait―let me guess," I interrupted. "I bet he said the room was big enough for three. Am I right?"

"Yeah. How did you know?" Jamie asked.

"Lucky guess." My voice was low, almost a growl. Jamie didn't notice.

He turned back to Wanda. "So that's good, isn't it, Wanda? It will be just like before we came here!"

Wanda's face contorted with pain. Jamie hadn't thought about what his words would mean to her. But he quickly realized his mistake.

"Oh. No, I mean but with you, too. It will be nice. The four of us, right?"

Wanda tried to laugh, but it was a weak, forced sound. I squeezed her hand. She was right about him not separating them the way he should. But I didn't know Melanie, there was no one for me to separate Wanda from. I just hoped she could separate herself from Melanie.

"The four of us," she mumbled. "Nice."

I hated the sad sound in her voice. But before I could do anything, Jamie crawled up the mattress and wrapped his arms around Wanda's neck. "Sorry. Don't be sad."

"Don't worry about it," she whispered, with the same sadness.

"You know I love you, too. Will you come back?" Jamie begged.

Wanda didn't answer right away. She seemed on the verge of tears, but she wasn't sad anymore. She was happier then I had ever seen her. I had to smile, even though I was angry at Jared. He'd won. Wanda would move back in with him and Jamie. It really was never even a question.

"What does Mel want?" he asked.

"She wants to live with you," she whispered.

"And what do you want?"

"Do you want me to live with you?" Of course, Wanda wouldn't think about herself. No. Even though I knew, deep down, she _did_ want live with them, she couldn't just say that. Why couldn't she put herself first, just once, even if by doing so she was choosing Jared over me?

"You know I do, Wanda. Please."

She hesitated, so he asked again. "Please?"

"If that's what you want, Jamie. Okay."

"Woo hoo!" Jamie screeched. "Cool! I'm gonna go tell Jared! I'll get you some food, too, okay?" He jumped to his feet and I could see Wanda flinch slightly. He was bouncing the bed and it must have hurt.

"Okay," she mumbled.

Then he turned to me. "You want something, Ian?"

"Sure, kid. I want you to tell Jared he's shameless."

"Huh?" he asked, not understanding.

"Never mind. Go get Wanda some lunch," I told him.

"Sure. And I'll ask Wes for his extra bed. Kyle can come back in here, and everything will be like it should be!"

"Perfect," I mumbled, rolling my eyes.

_Great, now I have to deal with Kyle again_, I thought.

Jared got his way. Wanda was moving in with him and I was out of the picture. But I wasn't going to give up so easily. Wanda was my best friend, we were together nearly everyday. And after... what Kyle did, there was no way I was letting her out of my sight. If Jared wanted a competition, he'd get one, because I wasn't ever going to give up on Wanda. Not ever.

"Perfect," I heard Wanda whisper after Jamie closed the door.


	16. Missing

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Sorry this chapter took so long, but it's kind of long so maybe that makes up for it. Thanks to everyone who has been reading. You guys are great! Hope you enjoy this one :)**

**In response to ****XxXxSlytherinPrincessxXxX's question, yes, I am going to be writing the whole book from Ian's POV.** **And check out the one-shot I wrote of Lily's reaction to Wanda and Ian's relationship. It's called **That's Interesting**.**

**P.S. Who else out there can't wait until April for the new paperback version of The Host? I'm freaking out! I already pre-ordered it. For anyone who doesn't know, it's going to have a new chapter!!! I'm so excited!**

**Blurring The Lines**

Chapter 16

Wanda moved back into Jamie and Jared's room. I wasn't the biggest fan of that plan, but there wasn't anything I could do about it. She _wanted_ to be there, so I let it go. I complained to Kyle about it sometimes, but that was mostly because I knew it annoyed him.

The one _good_ thing that came from Kyle's attempt at murder was that Wanda needed someone with her at all times. And that someone was usually me. I hated what Kyle did to her, but I loved the time we got to spend together now. She couldn't work much and she needed someone to carry her from place to place. She didn't like it, but only because Wanda's so independent. _I_ didn't mind waiting on her, bringing her food, things like that. I was actually going to miss it when she was feeling better.

Ever since Wanda and I kissed, I was trying to give her time to think about it. But with her and Jared sharing a room, I decided that flirting and hand holding was definitely on the table. Wanda didn't seem bothered by it. Melanie was another story, but she became used to me after a while. I know that it was unfair to Mel, but I couldn't just stay away from Wanda. It was like I could feel the connection between us, I was drawn to her. It would've been impossible for me to walk away.

The next week passed without any major catastrophes. That was, until Jared took Jamie out on a raid. We needed to replace a few broken tools so Jared took a few people, including Jamie, out for a short raid.

Wanda had not liked this idea. She freaked out when Jamie told her. He was so excited that he barely even noticed how Wanda tensed up. I doubt Melanie like it too much either. Wanda had had that faraway look in her eyes more often lately.

I wanted to cheer her up. I tried to cheer her up, but it was no use. Wanda was a worrier, which I found completely adorable, but I couldn't let her sit there and imagine all of the bad things that could happen out there. Jared was good at raiding, he never lost anyone when he went out. Jamie was as safe as he could be with Jared. I tried to tell Wanda all of this, but she barely even listened. So, when Wes and Lily asked if me and Wanda would be up for a game of two-on-two soccer, I agreed for her. It was a great distraction, and she hadn't gotten to play last time. I figured it would be something fun for her to do, rather than the work she normally does.

I walked into the kitchen and saw Wanda sitting on the counter eating her lunch. She looked in my direction and I smiled at her before heading over to get some food. We were having tomato soup today.

"Hey Wanda," I smiled as I hopped up on the counter next to her. She didn't say anything in return, just kept tearing at pieces of her roll. She wasn't eating it, just ripping it into shreds.

"Oh, come on," I said, placing my hand on her knee. The tingling feeling ran through my fingers just like it always did whenever I touched Wanda. "They'll be back today. Before sunset, without a doubt."

"You said that three days ago, and two days ago, and again yesterday," she said.

"I have a good feeling about today. Don't sulk—it's so human," I teased her.

"I'm not sulking." The pout on her face said otherwise. The only reason I didn't laugh at her was because I knew that would only cause trouble. She had practically been giving me the silent treatment the past couple of days. I didn't want to actually give her a reason to stop talking to me altogether. Wanda may not have been human, but she sure acted like one sometimes.

"This isn't the first raid Jamie's gone on," I reminded her.

"That makes me feel so much better," she said, sarcastically. She'd been doing that a lot lately.

She really _hadn't_ been in a good mood. I hated seeing her like that.

"He's got Jared and Geoffrey and Trudy with him. And Kyle's _here_." I joked. "So there's no way they'll get into any trouble."

"I don't want to talk about it," she muttered.

"Okay."

If she didn't want to talk, I wasn't going to push her. I completely understood why she was worried, but driving herself crazy was not the best way to handle it. I wished I had talked Jared out of taking Jamie with him. I'd do it next time. Jared wouldn't want to see Melanie this way, he'd listen. And Jamie would hate knowing that Wanda was suffering. If he knew he wouldn't ask to go on a raid again until Wanda was comfortable with it.

I finished my soup in silence. Wanda sat next to me, playing with the pieces of bread in her hands. When I was done, I noticed Wanda rubbing at her eyes.

"You tired?" I asked.

"Not really."

"Still not sleeping well?"

"It's too quiet," she muttered.

"I could sleep with you—" I began to offer, but halfway through I saw Wanda wince. "Oh, calm down, Melanie. You know what I meant."

Whenever Melanie felt I said or did something inappropriate she would get angry. And Melanie's anger upset Wanda, so I tried not to upset Melanie. It was complicated.

"I thought they were going to be back today," she challenged.

I sighed internally. I really wanted to sleep in her room, if only to let her get a good night's rest. She'd told me how much trouble she was having sleeping in that room by herself. But I couldn't go back on what I said now. Jared and Jamie should be back soon, maybe it _would be_ tonight.

"You're right. I guess there's no need for rearranging."

Wanda sighed.

"Maybe you should take the afternoon off," I told her.

"Don't be silly," she said. "I've got plenty of energy for work."

I smiled then. That was exactly what I wanted to hear. If she wasn't tired, she could play soccer. Wes and Lily were in the gameroom waiting for us right now.

"Good. I could use some help with a project."

"What's the project?" she asked.

"I'll show you—you done here?"

She nodded and hopped down off the counter. I grabbed her hand and led her out of the kitchen.

"Why are we going this way?" she asked, as we walked toward the eastern field.

I didn't answer her. I just smiled as I led down the corridor toward the gameroom. Then I could hear Wes and Lily warming up. Apparently, Wanda did, too.

"Ian, I'm not in the mood."

"You said you had plenty of energy," I reminded her.

"To work. Not to play soccer."

"But Lily and Wes will be really disappointed. I promised them a game of two-on-two. They worked so hard this morning to free up the afternoon…"

"Don't try to make me feel guilty."

"Isn't it working?" I smiled. "C'mon, Wanda. It will be good for you."

I pulled her into the room and Wes and Lily turned to greet us.

"Hey, Wanda. Hey, Ian," Lily called.

"This one's mine, O'Shea," Wes goaded.

"You're not going to let me lose to Wes, are you?" I murmured to Wanda.

"You could beat them alone," she told me. And it was true, but that wasn't the point.

"It would still be a forfeit. I'd never live it down."

She sighed. "Fine. _Fine_. Be that way."

I smiled widely and hugged her, almost picking her up off the ground. "You're my very favorite person in the known universe."

"Thanks," she muttered dryly. I didn't pay her any mind, though. This was good for her. She needed a distraction, even if she didn't want one.

"Ready to be humiliated, Wanda?" Wes asked. "You may have taken the planet, but you're losing this game."

I laughed at him. It was funny. Wanda didn't think so, though. She didn't find jokes like that funny. She couldn't understand how "humans could joke about things like that" as she put it.

"Do you know the rules?" Lily asked her.

"I remember them," Wanda responded, bending her leg at the knee and stretching.

Her leg had healed, the bruises were almost gone. She didn't think her ribs were broken, she said they didn't hurt her and were probably just bruised. Wanda was pretty much recovered from Kyle's attack.

Wanda wasn't around Kyle very much, for obvious reasons, but it seemed like he was getting over his prejudices. After he promised not to kill her he hadn't even complained about her to me. He normally would've been pissed at me for spending so much time with her, for spending _any_ time with her, but he didn't say anything about it. And whenever I mentioned Wanda to him, he would just nod or shrug. Sometimes I even thought he was actually listening. He seemed to finally be coming around. I hoped that was the case—maybe someday Kyle and Wanda would become friends. That would be nice, to be able to have Kyle and Wanda in the same room at the same time.

Lily moved back to play near the goal, while Wes stalked the center line.

"I'll take the goal," I said to Wanda. She didn't have a problem with that.

Wanda was fast. I remembered that. I hadn't seen her run very much, but the few times I did, I'd noticed how fast she was. She could easily outrun Wes. Even if she sucked at the rest of the game, if she could outrun him and get me the ball, I could make the shot. Lily was good, but I was better. I could easily score on them and keep them out of our goal at the same time. Wanda was right, I _could_ beat them by myself. Which was why I knew that we were going to win this game. I just didn't know Wanda was going to be such a big help.

She _was_ fast, but she had some other skills as well. She—well, Melanie—had obviously played before. It seemed, no matter how hard Lily tried to get the ball to Wes, Wanda was always there first. She would kick the ball to me and I'd soar it through their goalposts or I'd give it back to Wanda who'd then score on Lily.

It was nice, playing soccer with Wanda. Being a team. We worked well together. It was all too easy to cream Wes and Lily. The game was over sooner than I would've liked.

Lily gave up once we hit twenty-one. She was tired and out of breath. Wes, however, did not feel the same way. He didn't want to lose.

"Face it, they're better," Lily panted.

"We got hustled," Wes complained.

"No one ever said she couldn't play."

"No one ever said she was a pro, either."

That made Wanda smile, which made me smile. She hadn't smiled since Jamie and Jared left on the raid.

"Don't be a sore loser," Lily teased, tickling Wes's stomach. He took her hand and dragged her closer to him. She was laughing and trying to pull away from him, but he stopped her with a kiss.

Wanda and I looked at each other quickly. I didn't know that _that_ was going on. I knew he had a crush on her since forever, but not that they were actually together. I guess I had been so wrapped up in my own life lately that I hadn't been paying much attention to anyone else's.

"For you, I will lose with grace," Wes said, before letting Lily go.

She blushed slightly as she looked between me and Wanda. It looked as if she were waiting for some sort of reaction. Yeah, she was a little older than him, but who was _I_ to judge. I was in love with an alien girl who stole the body of my best friend's girlfriend. My love life was _way_ more twisted than just a few years age difference.

"And now, I'm off to get reinforcements. We'll see how your little ringer does against Kyle, Ian." Wes tossed the ball into the far corner of the room where it landed in the small hot spring.

I shook my head and then ran over to get it. It would take Wes a few minutes to get Kyle and come back. That was plenty of time to play a little one on one with Wanda.

I heard Lily say, "I know, I know."

"How long has… that been going on?" Wanda asked, curiously.

Lily didn't respond and I heard Wanda say, "Not my business. Sorry."

"It's okay. It's not a secret—how could anything be a secret here, anyway? It's just really… new to me. It's sort of your fault," Lily told her.

"What did I do?" Wanda asked, not seeming to realize Lily was teasing her.

I was at the spring now. It smelled horrible over here, so I grabbed the ball and quickly walked back to Wanda and Lily.

"Nothing," Lily said. "It was Wes's… reaction to you that surprised me. I didn't know he had so much depth to him. I was never really aware of him before that. Oh, well. He's too young for me, but what does that matter here?" She laughed. "It's strange how life and love go on. I didn't expect that."

"Yeah. Kind of funny how that happens," I agreed, walking over to Wanda and slipping my arm around her shoulders. "It's nice, though. You do know Wes has been infatuated with you since he first got here, right?"

"So he says. I hadn't noticed," Lily murmured.

"Then you're the only one," I laughed, then I turned to Wanda. "So, Wanda, how about some one-on-one while we're waiting?"

"Okay."

I let her have the ball first, while I stayed back near the goal. She shot it right between me and the goalpost, scoring. After she got the ball away from me and scored her second goal, she figured out I was letting her win. I couldn't help it, I loved the way she smiled when she scored a goal.

"Come on, Ian. Play."

"I am."

"Playing like a girl," she taunted.

I laughed, letting her slip the ball away from me again. She kicked the ball through my goal and then put it back at center field.

"You win, and you can sleep in my room while they're gone," she said.

I smiled slightly. Wanda knew how to get what she wanted, same as any _human_ girl did.

"First to ten," I agreed. Then I kicked the ball so hard that it sailed through her goal, hit the wall and bounced back to us.

"Was that wide?" Wanda asked Lily, who's was watching from her seat on the floor.

"No, it looked dead center to me."

"One–three," I announced. If Wanda wanted to _really_ play me, then I wasn't going to hold back. Besides, she wouldn't have wagered the sleeping arrangements if she didn't want me there.

I beat her in less than twenty minutes. She was good. She even scored one more goal on me—she was really excited about that. It made me smile.

"Ten–four, I win," I declared victoriously when it was all over.

Wanda was panting. She was tired. "Good game," she said, in between gasps of air.

"Tired?" I asked, teasingly. I stretched. "I think I'm ready for bed myself." I stared suggestively at her.

She cringed.

"Aw, Mel, you know I'm joking. Be nice."

Lily was staring at us now. Clearly confused.

"Jared's Melanie objects to me." I winked at her.

"That's... interesting," she said, raising her eyebrows.

"I wonder what's taking Wes so long?" I muttered. "Should we go find out? I could use some water."

"Me, too," Wanda agreed.

"Bring some back," Lily murmured from the ground. She was lying on her back on the floor.

Wanda and I walked into the tunnel leading back to the main plaza. I wrapped an arm around her waist.

"You know," I said, "it's really unfair for Melanie to make _you_ suffer when she's angry at me."

"Since when are humans fair?" she asked.

"Good point."

"Besides, she'd be glad to make you suffer, if I'd let her."

That made me laugh. Wanda cared about me enough to at least protect me from the wrath of Melanie.

"That's nice about Wes and Lily, don't you think?" I said.

"Yes. They both seem very happy. I like that."

I smiled. "I like it, too. Wes finally got the girl. Gives me hope." I winked at her. Looking at her, then, I had a sudden urge. "Do you think Melanie would make you very uncomfortable if I were to kiss you right now?" I asked.

Wanda stiffened and then took a deep breath.

"Probably," she muttered.

"Definitely," she corrected herself after a second. Or, more likely, Melanie corrected her.

I sighed, but I agreed to give her time so I couldn't complain. I was willing to wait for her.

"They're back! Wanda, they're back!" Wes's voice echoed off of the walls.

It didn't even take her half a second before she took off down the dark corridor for the main cave.

I shook my head and rolled my eyes. "What a waste of effort," I complained.

_Of course_ Jared would come back today. He was always in the way, why would now be any different.

"Where?" Wanda's voice echoed. She sounded more excited, more alive then she had in days.

"In the plaza," Wes's voice answered.

I walked to catch up. I wasn't nearly as excited about the raiders being back.

"Hey," Wes nodded as he came into view. "Is Lily still in there?" He motioned in the direction of the gameroom.

"Yeah, she's taking a break," I laughed.

He smiled to himself, then walked past me and into the gameroom.

When I finally caught up to Wanda in the main cavern she was with Jamie and Trudy.

"Hey, kid! Hey, Trudy!" I said jogging up to them.

"Hi, Ian," they both greeted me.

"What happened here?" I asked, noticing Jamie's bloody pant leg for the first time.

"Fell on a knife," Jamie muttered as he looked down at the floor.

I laughed.

"I don't think it's funny," Wanda said to me. Her voice was tight, she was upset.

"Could happen to anybody." I punched Jamie lightly in the arm. I felt bad for the kid. He was just trying to grow up, be a man.

"Right," he said.

"Where's everybody?"

"They, uh, had some unloading to finish up." Trudy's eyes flicked toward the southern tunnel and I understood what she was telling me.

Jared had brought back more bodies. I was furious. How could he bring more bodies back now? With Wanda here?

Trudy looked at Wanda who had been watching our exchange.

Wanda looked down at Jamie quickly. _Too_ quickly. "Are you hungry?"

"Yeah," the boy answered.

"When _aren't_ you hungry?" I joked.

The kid gave me a slight smirk and then Wanda and Trudy helped him to his room and settled him down on his mattress.

"You sure you're okay?" Wanda asked.

"It's nothing. Really. Doc says I'll be fine in a few days," Jamie told her. But it didn't matter what he said, Wanda was going to worry.

She nodded.

"I'm going to clean up," Trudy murmured as she left the room.

I leaned back against the wall. Wanda had caught on to more of mine and Trudy's silent conversation then I was comfortable with. She knew something was going on, same way she knew the last time. I wasn't going to let her find out what Jared and Doc were up to. It wasn't right, not with Wanda here. Not now that we knew her.

Wanda turned her face down to look at Jamie's leg.

"Ian?" she asked. "Do you mind getting us some food? I'm hungry, too."

"Yeah. Get us something good," Jamie added.

Wanda didn't look up at me. She just continued to look at Jamie's wound.

"Okay. I'll be back in just a second."

I was suspicious of the way she was acting, but I should get them both something to eat. Wanda didn't eat much at lunch today, and I knew she wouldn't want to leave Jamie, so I went to get them some food.

I wasn't gone five minutes, I made sure of it. But I was still too late. Wanda had left Jamie in the room by himself. I walked in with a tray of food for Jamie and Wanda. I put the food down on the mattress next to Jamie.

"Where's Wanda?" I asked. I probably already knew the answer, but I needed to make sure. Maybe Jamie had asked her for something...

"She said she was going to see you," he said, confused.

I didn't stick around to explain it to the kid. I took off toward the southern tunnel. I knew she wanted to know what was going on, but there was no way to explain it to her. She wouldn't understand. But she shouldn't _have_ to understand, because it was wrong. What we were doing to those poor souls was wrong and now Wanda was going to find out.

I ran through the empty corridors, then through the plaza. There were a few people gathered around, but mostly it was just the raiders heading to the washroom. People were looking at me funny, but I barely noticed. I just kept running until I was almost to the hospital. That was when I heard it.

A scream. It sounded like someone was being murdered.

Wanda. She wasn't being murdered, but she could possibly be witnessing a murder.

I ran even faster than before. I could hear their voices, but I could barely make out what they were saying.

Jared was trying to calm her down, but Wanda just kept screaming something.

"She's hysterical," I heard Doc say as I rounded the corner into the hospital. "Hold on."

Wanda was being held in place by Jared. Kyle and Jeb were on either side of them and Doc was in front of Wanda. He raised his hand and slapped her across the face.

I gasped. "What are you _doing_?"

Everyone except Wanda turned to see me entering the room.

"It's having a seizure or something, Ian. Doc's trying to bring it around," Kyle was defending them.

When I saw Wanda faint I ran across the room, pushing Jared and Kyle out of the way to get to her. I looked around at the silver pieces strewn all over the floor and the cots and the homemade table where Doc had all of his instruments laid out. I shook my head and lifted Wanda into my arms. I cradled her to me while I strode from the room.

I couldn't believe how _stupid_ these people could be. Did they really think she was having a _seizure_? And Doc had hit her! Not hard, of course, but he still shouldn't have done it. The poor thing had just seen two obviously dead human corpses and the bodies of her own kind streaked across the room. The silver blood had been everywhere, even Doc himself was covered in it. How could they not realize what had happened?

Jared jogged up next to me. I wasn't really in the mood to speak to him, I just wanted to get Wanda as far away from this place as possible.

"I don't know what happened. She just showed up and started screaming. I thought she'd have guessed what we were up to. Looks like I was wrong," Jared said.

"You think that's what happened?" I asked, my voice rough. "That she was scared because Doc was trying to take the other souls out? That she was afraid for herself?"

Jared was silent for a few seconds. "You don't?" he finally said.

I scoffed. "No. I don't. As disgusted as _I_ am that you would bring back more… victims for Doc, bring them back _now_!—as much as that turns my stomach, that's not what upset her. How can you be so blind? Can't you imagine what that must have looked like to her in there?"

"I know we had the bodies covered before —"

"The _wrong bodies_, Jared. Oh, I'm sure Wanda would be upset by a human corpse—she's so gentle; violence and death aren't a part of her normal world. But think what the things on that table must have meant to her."

He was quiet for another couple of seconds. Then he understood. "Oh."

"Yes. If you or I had walked in on a human vivisection, with torn body parts, with blood splattered on everything, it wouldn't have been as bad for us as it was for her. We'd have seen it all before—even before the invasion, in horror movies, at least. I'd bet she's never been exposed to anything like that in all her lives."

I looked down at the girl in my arms and wanted to lean down and kiss her on the forehead. I wanted to hold her and comfort her and make her feel better, but I didn't get a chance. She woke up then.

"Let me go," she whispered. "Put me down."

"I didn't mean to wake you. I'm sorry." My voice was tender. I wanted her to know how truly sorry I was that she had to go through any of this, but she didn't care.

"Let me go."

"You're not well. I'll take you to your room."

"No. Put me down now."

"Wanda —" I started to say.

"Now!" Wanda screamed. She pushed my chest and kicked her legs. I wasn't expecting her to fight me. She had never done that before. She never fought back. I lost my grip and dropped her. She landed on her feet and took of running down the southern tunnel, toward the main plaza.

"Wanda!" I screamed.

I tried to run after her, but Jared caught hold of my arm.

"Let her go," he told me.

"Don't touch me!" I growled at him. "Wanda, come back!"

Jared wouldn't let me go. What was wrong with him? Didn't he care about anyone but himself? Wanda was scared and alone. She needed me. I struggled to get away, but we just ended up wrestling for a few minutes.

When I finally managed to get him off of me, he sat against the wall of the tunnel. I stood up and started walking in the direction Wanda went.

"She needs time, Ian," Jared called from behind me, but I didn't listen. I didn't stop.

When I reached the bright main room I asked the few people there if they'd seen Wanda. A few said she had run by, but no one had noticed where she went. I went to Jamie's room first, but she wasn't there. I didn't bother the kid, he would just hurt himself even worse trying to look for her.

I looked in the kitchen, the bathing room, the storage area, _everywhere_. I couldn't find her. I kept asking if anyone had seen her, but they all said the same thing. No one had seen her since earlier in the afternoon.

I started to panic. What if she left? If she found the way out of the caves she would be stuck out in the desert. I knew she wouldn't tell anyone about us, but the desert was dangerous. She'd almost died the last time she was out there. What if she was lost and we couldn't find her?

I kept looking, but no Wanda. I had to tell Jeb. He could help. I needed to find her. She couldn't just disappear. She couldn't.

I ran all the way back to the hospital wing. Kyle and Jeb were still there, along with Doc. They were cleaning up.

"She's... gone," I panted. "I can't... find her."

They were all staring at me, confused by what I was saying.

"Slow down, Ian. Breathe," Doc suggested.

I leaned forward, my hands on my knees, and took a few deep breathes.

"Wanda... She's gone. I can't find her anywhere."

Jeb looked at me. He was worried. It took him a few seconds to come up with a plan.

"Get everybody looking for her. She doesn't know the way out, so she's gotta be here somewhere." Then he turned to Kyle. "But just in case, Kyle, start looking outside as well."

Kyle nodded and left the room. I turned to follow him, but Jeb stopped me.

"Ian," he said.

I looked back at him.

"Where did you look?" he asked.

"Everywhere," I told him. I was still breathing heavier than usual. "I can't think of anywhere else to check."

"Don't worry," Doc said, his tone soothing. "I'm sure she's around somewhere. We'll find her."

I glared at him. I know it wasn't his fault. Jared was the one who came back with the bodies, but why had Doc cut them up. He hated it. Last time he had drank himself into a stupor trying to avoid the guilt he felt over it. He could've said no. He could've told Jared to go to hell.

I felt my face getting hot. I was so angry at Doc and Jared and even Jeb. He was the one who approved of Doc's murders. He didn't care that Wanda could be gone, that she might never come back. He didn't care that what they had done hurt her. That what she had seen them doing made her leave. No one cared.

"Ian, calm down," Jeb ordered. "It's not Doc's fault. It's no ones fault. Wanda just walked in on something she shouldn't have."

"Sure," I said, sarcastically. I rolled my eyes and walked to the door. "Whatever you say, Jeb," I called over my shoulder as I left.

Everyone in the caves was looking for Wanda. Hours later we still hadn't found her. Kyle was outside looking for her. I wanted to go out there. To make sure that, _if_ they found her, they wouldn't hurt her. I had already looked everywhere inside for her, so I walked to the exit. I stopped one more time in the storage area to look for her. I checked the small hole in the wall, the cell we had kept her in when she first got here, but she wasn't there. She wasn't anywhere.

I stood in the dark tunnel, alone, trying to think of someplace I'd missed. I just couldn't think of anywhere else that she would go. I was breathing heavily. Quick, shallow breaths.

What if she was outside? What if they had already found her outside? What if they...?

I shook my head, trying to clear the thought from my head. Didn't they know by now that she would never hurt them? She couldn't. Wanda's not capable of hurting anyone. But I knew they didn't see it that way. Didn't see _her_ that way. I had to find her, before they did.

I turned back toward the exit. I was on the verge of a panic attack when Trudy's voice called out to me.

"Ian! Ian, we found her!"


	17. Worried

**Stephenie Meyer owns The Host.**

**I am so, so, so, so, _so_ sorry about how long it took to get this chapter up. I've been working on some of my own stories lately and this story just kind of slipped my mind. I had a lot of it written I just never actually sat down and edited it. So I am very sorry about that. And I wanted to let you know I will try to update more often.**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed or favorited. You guys are the reason I keep this story going. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter. Sorry it sort of ends on a cliffhanger, but everyone knows what happens, so...**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 17_

There was a group forming in the eastern field when I arrived. Wanda was in the game room. Trudy said she wasn't speaking to anyone. She said that Jared had ordered everyone to leave Wanda alone.

I walked past them, down the dark corridor that led to the game room. When I reached the entrance Jared was walking out.

"Where is she?" I demanded.

"She wants to be alone. Let her be."

"Don't get I'm my way again, Howe." I walked forward, but he put an arm out to stop me.

"Do you think she wants comfort from you? From a human?" he asked.

"I wasn't party to this ―"

"Not _this_ time," he said in a low voice. "You're one of us, Ian. Her enemy. Did you hear what she said in there? She was screaming _monsters_. That's how she sees us now. She doesn't want your comfort."

I refused to listen to him. Wanda was scared and hurting and whether she wanted me there or not she needed _someone_. I couldn't let her sit there by herself.

"Give me the light," I ordered.

Jared looked angry, like he wanted to fight me on this, but he didn't. He gave me the flashlight he was holding and slowly walked away.

I flipped the flashlight on and began scanning the big game room. Eventually, I spotted Wanda in the back corner. She was huddled against the rock wall. I could see her tense up as I walked nearer.

I sighed and sat down on the ground―not too close to Wanda, but close enough. She didn't speak, but she didn't move away, either. Leaning back against the rocks, I watched her. She was perfectly silent, not crying or anything. She just sat there with her arms wrapped around her legs and her head buried in her knees.

It was unbearable, knowing she was so upset. I did want to comfort her, but I knew I shouldn't. I could tell from the way she flinched when I walked in that Jared was right. She didn't want me here, but she _did_ need me. She was upset, but eventually she'd have to leave this room. And I wanted her to know that, no matter what, I would always be there for her, in any way she needed me to be. If that meant sitting here in the dark with her, then that was what I was going to do.

I didn't say anything. Not for days. Instead I sat silently and listened to her even breaths. They seemed to echo through the quiet cave.

Wanda wouldn't eat anything. I would leave the game room a few times a day to get food for Wanda, but she never ate it. Her still full tray would sit at her feet until I took it away and brought her a new one. She wouldn't drink anything, either.

She didn't move, not once, when I was there with her. The first night, after she fell asleep, I decided to move her so she'd be more comfortable. I knew she wouldn't want to leave the room, but I figured, just while she slept, she should be comfortable. So, once she was sleeping, I pulled her into my lap.

I laid her head and shoulders on my legs and gently brushed a few strands of dark hair out of her face.

She was beautiful.

I had to respect what she was doing, even though I didn't like it. Wanda was protesting against what we were doing to those poor souls. She hated it, hated us.

What if she always hated me? What if she could never forgive us for what we had done? It was awful, it really was. I couldn't blame her if she did hate me forever. But I had the feeling that Wanda wasn't able to stay mad that long. She was too sweet, too kind. She was a naturally forgiving person. She forgave me for trying to kill her.

I fell asleep hoping that when I woke up tomorrow Wanda would at least talk to me.

What actually happened the next morning was far from what I had hoped.

I woke before Wanda. She was so peaceful looking that I didn't move for fear of waking her. Her head was still pillowed on my lap.

When she finally did open her eyes, it took her half a second to figure out where she was and fling herself away from me, cringing. She didn't want me to touch her, she didn't want me near her.

It broke my heart.

I could have had something special with this girl, something I'd never had with anyone else, and now, because of Jared, it was over before it really started. I hated Jared for it. If he hadn't brought back those damn bodies, if he didn't want to get rid of Wanda and bring back Melanie...

I stayed there with her most of the day. Kyle tried to talk to me once I did finally leave the game room.

"You look awful, bro," he told me. He put his hand on my shoulder.

"Thanks," I muttered dryly.

"Come on, Ian. You barely leave that cave. Neither of you can stay in there forever."

"She's upset. As long as she's staying so am I!" I snapped.

Kyle gave me a strange look, then he said, "You have to eat, Ian. If she wants to starve herself to death that's her business―" When I started to get angry he put his hands up in front of him. "I just mean, if you want to take care of her, you have to take care of yourself, too."

He was right, I hadn't eaten anything since I realized she was protesting. I felt that it was wrong somehow, to eat while she was purposely starving herself. I tried to get her to eat, but I wasn't going to stick the food down her throat, that'd only make her hate me more.

When I tried to talk to her about it she wouldn't speak to me. She didn't respond in anyway, but I knew she was listening. I asked her not to hate me, I begged her to eat. Nothing worked.

I knew that I should have told her about... everything. I shouldn't have kept it a secret. I just didn't want to hurt her, I didn't want _this_ to happen. But it happened anyway, and maybe if I had explained she wouldn't feel so hurt, so betrayed right now.

When I left the game room, I wasn't sure where I was going to go, but I couldn't sit there anymore. It was bothering me, no matter what I did Wanda wouldn't eat. I just needed a few minutes alone, really alone, to stretch my legs and figure out what to do.

I didn't get any alone time though.

Jamie was sick, very sick. Doc said it was blood poisoning, and from the pink lines running up the kid's leg, I was certain he was right. In the old days, before the invasion, it wouldn't have been a problem. Some antibiotics would clean the infection out, no problem, but now...

What could Doc do?

When I went to check on the kid, everyone was crowded around the entrance to his room, watching. Jamie wanted to go check on Wanda, but he was too weak. That didn't stop him from trying to crawl out of bed though. Jared was practically holding him down.

"But Jared... what if she's _not_ okay?" Jamie said. His voice sounded weak. His face was sweaty and his skin was a sickly pink color.

"She's fine. She's just upset, that's all." Jared was kneeling next to the mattress in the middle of the room. One of his hands on Jamie's shoulder. Comforting, but also restraining.

"We shouldn't have brought anyone back. It's _our_ fault," Jamie mumbled. "She has every right to be upset, but I don't want her to be. I want to see her."

Jared made his way into the hall, then he noticed me; he was freaking out. He wanted to drag Wanda out of the game room so Jamie would see that she was alright.

"Nobody's forcing Wanda to do anything," I said. My voice was deadly serious. "When she's ready she'll―"

"Jamie might not have that much time, not if he's upset about―"

"_What_? Jared that won't happen. It _won't_. We'll figure something out, we always do. We'll find a way to get help for the kid. We'll search, he'll be fine."

I was trying to comfort Jared. He looked so pained, so upset. His expression reminded me of Wanda, sitting in that dark cave all by herself. He looked alone and utterly miserable. That kid was like his brother...

How would Wanda handle this?

Not well, that was for sure. I couldn't imagine what her reaction would be.

Jared was right, she needed to be here, but how do you tell someone their body's brother is sick? Sick enough that Jared looks like he's about to cry?

He was hiding it well, but underneath that stiff mask I knew he was losing it. Jared wasn't as calm and collected as he usually was. He was on the verge of a major wigging and it was only a matter of time.

"Where's Jeb? Maybe he can think of somewhere that might still keep antibiotics."

"Jeb went to talk to her," Jared said.

"What?" I asked. I knew who he was talking about, but I just left her. I hadn't seen Jeb on my way out of the game room or while walking to Jared and Jamie's room.

Jared's expression turned hard. "Jamie is very sick, Ian. He needs to rest so he can recover, but he _won't_. Not until he sees Wanda." He said the words slowly, like he was talking to a child.

It pissed me off.

"Wanda―" I barked. "―has her own problems right now. If you hadn't brought―"

"This isn't my fault, Ian. Blame it on me all you want, but it isn't anyone's fault. I'm sorry that she saw what she saw, but we have to try."

"Why? So we can continue to kill innocent people. It's not _working_, Jared. Doc can't figure it out."

"Well, we never know unless we try," he said through gritted teeth.

I shook my head.

"Ian, Jamie needs her." Jared almost sounded like he was pleading. "And you know she'd want to be here with him."

I dragged my hands down my face.

He was right. Wanda would want to be here if she knew, but I didn't want to _tell_ her. She was traumatized enough by what she had seen, she didn't need to know about Jamie, too.

Ugh, this was all Jared's fault. Why did he have to bring the kid out in the first place? And he brought those damned bodies back with him!

I looked him dead in the eyes. "Don't you _ever_ bring anyone back with you ever again," I growled.

Jared began to get angry, but I wheeled around to head back to the game room. To Wanda.

The first thing I noticed when I got there was the echo of voices. Wanda's voice. And Jeb's. I couldn't quite make out what they were saying, but as I entered the dark cavern, they stopped talking.

Then I saw the light. Jeb must have brought it with him. It was illuminating the dark corner Wanda was sitting in.

Jeb was with her. And he had gotten her to talk.

As I walked closer I noticed that he had also gotten her to eat. She had a mashed up corn roll in her hand.

I sighed. "Here you are, Jeb. Jared guessed you might be here."

I sat down on the floor next to them, making sure I gave Wanda enough room. It was good that she was talking and eating again, but I didn't want to push her.

She slid closer to me and placed her hand on top of mine. "Sorry," she said.

I twisted my hand so that I was holding hers. "Don't apologize to me."

"I should have known. Jeb's right. Of course you fight back. How can I blame you for that?"

"It's different with you here. It should have stopped."

It should have and I was going to make sure it did. If Jared ever brought anyone back here again, I'd... _I'll stop him. Whatever it takes. He can't destroy innocent people like that. Humans or souls. No one deserves to die like that._

"All's fair in war," she said, giving me a faint smile.

I smiled back, weakly. "And love. You forgot that part."

"Okay, break it up," Jeb muttered. "I'm not done here."

Both Wanda and I looked at him as he continued.

"Now." He paused, searching for the right words, it seemed, and took a deep breath. "Try not to freak out again, okay?"

I felt Wanda's grip on my hand tighten. I took one look at the panic written all over Wanda's face and then glanced sharply at Jeb.

"You're going to tell her?" I asked. She had barely gotten over one trauma. And I knew Wanda. She was going to react worse to Jamie being sick than she had to what she had seen in the hospital a few days ago.

"What now?" She gasped. "What is it _now_?"

Jeb kept his face expressionless. "It's Jamie."

Wanda looked like she was going to be ill. It was just like I thought. She was going to react very badly to this.

She jumped to her feet, dragging me with her. She was still gripping my hand, tightly. Once she was up, she swayed slightly.

"Sheesh. I said don't freak out, Wanda," Jeb muttered. "Jamie's okay. He's just really anxious about you. He heard what happened, and he's been asking for you―worried out of his mind, that kid is―and I don't think it's good for him. I came down here to ask you to go see him. But you can't go like this. You look horrible. It will just upset him for no good reason. Sit down and eat some more food."

"His leg?" Wanda asked, demanded, actually.

"There's a little infection," I murmured. "Doc wants him to stay down or he'd have come to get you a long time ago. If Jared wasn't practically pinning him to the bed, he would have come anyway."

"Jared almost came here and carried you out by force, but I told him to let me speak to you first," Jeb said, nodding. "It wouldn't do the kid any good to see you catatonic."

"What's being done?" Wanda's voice was unsteady.

"Nothin' _to_ do. Kid's strong; he'll fight it off." Jeb shrugged.

"Nothing to do? What do you mean?"

"It's a bacterial infection," I said, apologetically. "We don't have antibiotics anymore."

"Because they don't work," she said. "―the bacteria are smarter than your medicines. There has to be something better, something else."

"Well, we don't have anything else," Jeb said. "He's a healthy kid. It just has to run its course."

"Run... it's... course," she murmured.

"Eat something," I pleaded. "You'll worry him if he sees you like this."

Wanda rubbed her eyes. "No," she whispered.

Then she moaned louder, "No."

"Wait," I said, as she made her way for the door. But, as she pulled me with her, I didn't try to stop her.

Jeb caught up with us and shoved some more food into Wanda's hand. "Eat for the kid's sake."

Wanda took a bite of the corn bread and continued to walk forward.

"Knew she was gonna overreact," Jeb groaned.

"So why did you tell her?" I asked him.

I was frustrated with Jeb. I was glad that he helped Wanda. Thankful. _Grateful_. But he was pushing it by bring her to Jamie now. I just hoped the kid would be alright. _I_ didn't want anything to happen to him, but I knew Wanda wouldn't be able to handle it if something did. And after the last three days, I didn't think _I'd_ be able to handle it if Wanda went catatonic again.

"Is he in the hospital?" she asked.

"No, no," I assured her. "He's in your room."

No one spoke again as we made our way to Jamie's room.

The corridor was still filled with people. It seemed like everyone was there. Standing in the hallway, waiting for some news on Jamie. They all smiled when they saw Wanda.

"Wanda," Heidi said. "Wanda's here."

"Let her through," Wes said. And then he clapped Jeb on the back. "Good job."

Everyone in the hall made a path for Wanda to get by. She walked by them without saying a word. She looked lost in thought. Maybe she was speaking with Melanie again. I followed her into Jamie's room.

Jared was leaning against the wall with his hands behind his back. His face was flat but I knew he was worried. Doc was kneeling next to Jamie's bed and Jamie was lying very still. His face was red and he was covered in sweat. The wound on his leg was small, but red and swollen.

"Wanda." Jamie sighed. "Oh, you're okay. Oh."

Wanda dropped to her knees next to him, pulling me with her. Doc moved out of her way.

"Jamie, baby, how are you?" she asked.

"Stupid." Jamie grinned. "Just plain stupid. Can you believe this?" He motioned to the wound. "Of all the luck."

Wanda picked up a wet towel that had been lying next to the bed and wiped Jamie's forehead.

"You're going to be fine," she swore. She sounded like she was trying to will the words to be true.

"Of course. It's nothing," Jamie said. "But Jared wouldn't let me come talk to you. I heard about… and Wanda, you know I ―"

O_f course Jamie is more worried about Wanda then himself_, I thought, feeling even worse that the kid was sick. He was so... _good_, if anything happened to him I wasn't sure I could handle it. I'd spent a lot of time with him recently. I had started to see him as a little brother, as family...

"Shh. Don't even think of it," Wanda told him. "If I'd had any idea you were sick I would have been here sooner."

"I'm not really sick. Just a stupid infection. I'm glad you're here, though. I hated not knowing how you were."

Wanda didn't say anything. It looked like she was about to cry. Jamie noticed it, too; he changed the subject.

"So I heard you schooled Wes the day we got back. Man, I wish I could have seen that! I bet Melanie loved it."

I smiled at that.

"Yes. She did," Wanda answered mechanically. She kept wiping his head with the wet rag.

"She okay?" Jamie asked. "Not too worried?"

"Of course she's worried." Wanda seemed to be thinking about something. Maybe Melanie was talking to her again, distracting her.

"You okay? Wanda?" Jamie asked.

"I'm… tired. Jamie, I'm sorry. I'm just… out of it."

Lie. What was wrong? I didn't say anything, though. Whatever it was, she was trying to keep it from Jamie for a reason.

Jamie looked at Wanda thoughtfully for a moment. "You don't look so good," he said.

"I haven't cleaned up in a while."

"I'm fine, you know. You should go eat or something. You're pale."

"Don't worry about me," she said, still looking distant.

"I'll get you some food," I said to Wanda. "You hungry, kid?"

"Ah… no, not really," Jamie murmured.

Wanda looked at Jamie for a second and then squeezed my hand tighter. "Send someone else."

"Sure," I said. "Wes, could you get some food? Something for Jamie, too. I'm sure he'll find that appetite by the time you get back."

I was worried about Wanda. I'd never seen her so clingy before. I loved that she wanted me when she was scared, but I didn't want her to _be_ scared.

"Jamie, do you mind if I go wash my face? I feel sort of… grimy," she said.

It sounded like a lie, but I could see how it might not be. She hadn't cleaned up in a few days and before that we'd been playing soccer, she was bound to be dirty.

Jamie also heard the lie, but he didn't say anything. "Of course."

Wanda stood, bringing me up with her. "I'll be right back. I mean it this time," she promised.

Jamie smiled and Wanda pulled me into the hall.

Jeb was the only one still in the hallway. He stared at us as Wanda led me away from the bedrooms.

She dragged me into the intersection that led to all the bedroom corridors, but instead of leading me out into the big garden, she pulled me into one of the corridors. A dark one, it was deserted.

"Wanda, what ―"

"I need you to help me, Ian." Her voice was frantic. It caught me by surprise.

"Whatever you need. You know that."

She took my face into both of her hands. Her soft palms felt good against my skin.

"I need you to kiss me, Ian. Now. Please."


	18. Decisions

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Okay so who else has read the extra chapter in the paperback version of The Host? How good was that?!? I loved it, and if you haven't checked it out yet, it's so worth it.**

**And, Ian Somerhalder is rumored to play Ian O'Shea in The Host movie?!?!? It's just a good time for The Host right now. And I really hope that he gets cast, for real. Along with Jensen Ackles. If you guys haven't seen Supernatural, check it out because Jensen's character Dean is so much like Jared Howe. I think he'd be awesome.**

**So now that I got all of that out of the way, thanks to everyone who has been reading and reviewing. You guys are so cool, thanks. Hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 18_

I knew my mouth was hanging wide open like a fool, but I couldn't help it. "You... what?"

Wanda's face was pained as she spoke. "I'll explain in a minute. This isn't fair to you, but… please. Just kiss me."

"It won't upset you? Melanie won't bother you?"

"Ian!" she cried. "Please!"

I grabbed her waist and gently pulled her to me. I didn't know why she wanted this, and now of all times, but she was serious. I told her I'd do anything for her, and kissing Wanda was definitely not a sacrifice. I lowered my lips to hers and kissed her softly. Once.

When I pulled away, she looked frustrated.

"No, Ian. Really _kiss_ me. Like… like you're _trying_ to get slapped. Do you understand?"

I kept my face expressionless, if a little worried, but my heart was beating wildly. No girl had ever said that to me before. _Kiss me like you're trying to get slapped_. I wanted to slam her into the wall and kiss her until she was gasping for air, my hands all over her body...

Not her body. Melanie's. It was Melanie's body and I couldn't do that to her, but why was Wanda asking me to in the first place? Something was wrong.

"No. What's wrong? Tell me first," I demanded.

I didn't get an answer. Instead she reached up and wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling my lips down to meet hers. I tried to hold her away, I wanted to know why she was doing this, but when our lips made contact that idea flew out of my head.

I kissed her back, our mouths moving in sync with one another. She took my lower lip in between her teeth and bit down gently.

A low growl ripped from my throat and I reached up to cup her face to mine. I had waited for this moment for too long to pass it up. My other hand went to her lower back as I pushed her into the stone wall behind her. Trapping her between me and the cave wall. We were gasping, her breath was warm on my face. I could barely think. All I knew was that I was closer to Wanda than I had ever been before... and I liked it.

When her arms went limp around my neck, I noticed. I pulled back, just enough that I could see into her eyes. Her breath, still coming in gasps, blew against my lips. I eventually loosened my grip on her and brought my hands up to her shoulders.

Her arms drooped to her sides. Whatever she had been attempting to do, it seemed she was giving up now.

"Explain," I demanded.

"She's not here," she whispered. "I can't find her. Not even now."

"Melanie?" So that's what she was doing.

"I can't hear her! Ian, how can I go back in to Jamie? He'll know that I'm lying! How can I tell him that I've lost his sister _now_? Ian, he's sick! I can't tell him that! I'll upset him, make it harder for him to get well. I ―"

I pressed my fingers to her lips. "Shh, shh. Okay. Let's think about this. When was the last time you heard her?"

"Oh, Ian! It was right after I saw… in the hospital. And she tried to defend them… and I screamed at her… and I―I made her go away! And I haven't heard her since. I can't find her!"

"Shh." She was almost in hysterics. "Calmly. Okay. Now, what do you really want? I know you don't want to upset Jamie, but he's going to be fine regardless. So, consider―would it be better, just for you, if ―"

Wanda's reaction was enough to make me feel horrible about that idea.

"No! I can't erase Melanie! I can't. That would be wrong! That would make me a monster, too!"

"Okay, okay! Okay. Shh. So we have to find her?"

Wanda nodded her head vehemently. And I took a deep breath.

I knew what needed to be done now. She kissed me to try to get Melanie to come back, but it hadn't worked. She wasn't... overwhelmed. Not the way she was when she kissed Jared. Not enough to get Melanie to break out, to take control.

"Then you need to… really be overwhelmed, don't you?" I asked.

"I don't know what you mean," she said.

But it didn't matter. She'd figure it out soon enough, and if I explained it to her she'd probably just argue with me.

"I'll be right back," I promised. "Stay here. " I pressed her against the wall, hoping to get my point across. She needed to stay right here.

Then I strode off, back toward Jared's room.

I had to do this. It was the only way to get Melanie back, and I knew Wanda was right. It would be wrong to erase her. To let her fade away. I had to get Jared. He was the only one who could get Melanie agitated enough to come back from wherever it was that she went to. Agitate her by kissing another girl, Wanda.

I told myself that it was the right thing to do the entire way back to Jared's room. When I got there Jared was still in his spot leaning against the wall. He'd be mad when he found out that Melanie was lost, but I didn't think he'd be mad at Wanda. He wouldn't hurt her, he'd help her get Mel back. He was the only one who could.

I cleared my throat. "Uh, Jared, could I see you in the hall for a minute?"

His eyes were still fixed on Jamie's face, but he slowly turned to look at me when I spoke. His face looked hard and strained as he walked out of the room.

"What is it, Ian? Where's Wanda?" he asked.

"She's waiting for you," I said. "She needs... a little help with something." I began walking down the tunnel, toward Wanda. He followed me.

"What kind of help? What is she doing?" he kept asking, clearly frustrated. "I don't have time for this!"

"It'll only take a minute. You just have to kiss her, that's all."

I heard Jared's steps pause behind me, but I didn't stop. He composed himself and caught up quickly.

"What?" he asked.

"Just think of it as… an experiment," I said. That's what he had said the first time he'd kissed Wanda.

"Are you crazy?" Jared asked me. "Is this some sick joke?"

We rounded the corner leading to the tunnel I had left Wanda in. By this time I was practically pushing Jared ahead of me into the mostly deserted tunnel.

"Through here," I said. Now I could see Wanda. She looked like she was about to be sick. She'd be okay though, she was just embarrassed. I didn't know whether it was a good thing or a bad thing that she wasn't embarrassed to kiss me. I hoped it was a good sign, she was comfortable around me. That's good, right?

But I couldn't think about my relationship with Wanda now. Jared was walking toward her. She glared at me, briefly, before explaining the situation to Jared. I stood there for a moment, watching them talk, but I couldn't stay. I had to leave, I couldn't watch her with him. I walked back to Jamie's room. They'd come back... when they were finished.

I knew it was just to get Melanie back. She had to kiss him to get Melanie back. But the look on her face when she walked through the door of Jamie's room ten minutes later nearly broke my heart. Mel came back, just like I thought she would, but Wanda wasn't happy. She couldn't be. Jamie was still sick and she had kissed Jared, which I knew upset her. Not because she didn't want to kiss him either. She did want to, that was the problem. But it was only because of Melanie. Because of Mel's feeling for Jared. It was her love for him that was effecting Wanda. I just hoped she would eventually be able to work past that.

Jamie was getting worse, not better. A lot worse. Jared, Kyle and I agreed to go out on a raid to find something to help him. We took the jeep, wanting to be as quick as possible. As much as we didn't want to believe it, Doc didn't think the kid had much time left.

No one spoke as we drove out of the desert. Not even Kyle. He wasn't in his usual good mood as we staked out a house in a neighborhood about a day's drive from the caves. We didn't find anything there, so we went to the house next door. Nothing there, either.

I could see that Jared was getting more and more upset as we drove to another neighborhood in the same area. Normally we wouldn't do that. It'd be too risky, but we were crunched for time and couldn't waste another day traveling to a different town.

We searched and searched, but the souls didn't keep antibiotics anymore. They didn't use our medicines. They had they're own. The only thing you saw in medicine cabinets these days were little white bottles with strange labels printed on them.

Why couldn't one, just one, soul forget about a bottle of penicillin? Accidentally leave it there for us. Just one! That's all the kid needed. Blood poisoning isn't that serious, not with the right medicine. Why couldn't one of them have left us some damn antibiotics!

I closed the medicine cabinet and stared into the mirror in front of me.

I was in a small bathroom in a nicely decorated white house. It had been so long since I actually looked in a mirror. A real mirror, not the dusty ones in the big caves. But I looked at myself now.

I saw a very pale face staring back at me. Black tufts of hair hanging in my eyes. It was getting too long and I needed to cut it. The blue eyes that looked out at me were sad.

What if the kid really... Wanda couldn't handle it. She wasn't used to death. She had never lost anyone before. And Jared. What was Jared going to do? He treated that kid like he was his brother. His own flesh and blood. He'd be devastated. What would life be like in the caves without Jamie? He was like family. I didn't want to lose anymore family.

I opened the medicine cabinet and checked again. Then I went upstairs and double checked the bathroom up there. Still nothing. Jared and Kyle had checked the house next door. All they could find was some ice. They found a cooler to keep it in and shoved it in the backseat of the jeep. There was nothing else to do. We weren't going to find any medicine out here and the little bit of ice we'd found was melting fast. We drove back to the desert, knowing our efforts had been useless. The kid was still just as sick as ever. We hadn't helped at all.

Wanda was miserable. She stood with her back to the wall, eyes fixed on Jamie's sweaty, pink face. Everyone was gathered either in Jamie's room, or in the hall outside. Jared was standing on the other side of Wanda. He looked horrible and was also looking at Jamie, but I couldn't keep my eyes off of Wanda. She looked as though she were in physical pain standing there, but there was nothing I could do for her. I had blown the only chance we had. I hadn't been able to find anything to help the kid while we were on the raid.

"Nothing?" Doc was saying. "Did you check ―"

"Every spot we could think of," Kyle told him. "It's not like painkillers, drugs―lots of people had reason to keep those hidden. The antibiotics were always kept in the open. They're gone, Doc."

"Don't look like that," I whispered to Wanda. "He'll pull through. He's tough."

She didn't respond. She continued to stare at Jamie. She watched as Doc knelt beside Jamie and trickled water into the boys mouth. The sound of him swallowing was painful to hear.

"Jamie needs real medicines. The ones the souls have. We need to get him those." It was the first time Wanda had spoken since she found out we hadn't brought anything back from the raid.

Doc frowned. "We don't even know what those things do, how they work."

"Does it matter?" she asked. "They do work. They can save him."

She was angry and frustrated and already grieving for the dying boy at her feet.

"We can't get 'em, Wanda," Jeb said, sadly. "We can only get into deserted places. There's always a bunch of your kind in a hospital. Twenty-four hours a day. Too many eyes. We won't do Jamie any good if we get caught."

"Sure," Kyle said, like an idiot. "The centipedes will be only too happy to heal his body when they find us here. And make him one of them. Is that what you're after?"

I was about to tell him that now wasn't the time, but instead Wanda turned on him, glaring and tense. She looked like she might try to scratch his eyes out. I put a hand on her shoulder, holding her back. She would hate herself if she hurt someone in the heat of the moment. Even if that someone was Kyle.

"There has to be a way," she muttered.

Jared nodded. "Maybe someplace small. The gun would make too much noise, but if there were enough of us to overwhelm them, we could use knives."

Wanda tried to tell them that wasn't what she meant, but Jeb was already arguing with Jared. Trying to explain why it wouldn't work.

"I don't want the boy to die, either," Kyle interrupted. "But we can't risk everyone's lives for one person. People die here; it happens. We can't get crazy to save one boy."

"We have to save him," Wanda said in a loud, clear voice.

Jeb looked at her. "Hon, we can't just walk in there and ask."

Then, for the first time since she'd found out Jamie was sick, Wanda's face cleared. She looked a little less strained then she had a few seconds ago. "You can't. But I can," she said softly.

_Oh no_. I realized what she was going to do just a fraction of a second before she did it. I opened my mouth, but closed it as Wanda began to speak.

She was talking to herself, or maybe to Melanie. Her eyes were focused on a middle distance only she could see.

"They aren't _suspicious_. Not at all. Even if I'm a horrible liar, they would never suspect me of anything. They wouldn't be listening for lies. Of course not. I'm one of them. They would do anything to help me. I'd say I got hurt hiking or something… and then I'd find a way to be alone and I'd take as much as I could hide. Think of it! I could get enough to heal everyone here. To last for years. And Jamie would be fine! Why didn't I think of this before? Maybe it wouldn't have been too late even for Walter."

She looked up at us, her eyes gleaming. She was happy for the first time in days, but it was no good. They'd never let her out of the caves. They'd never trust her, not with this. She couldn't leave, they'd kill her.

Her face dropped as she realized this, too. "Please. It's the only way to save him."

"Patient, isn't it?" Kyle said, nastily. "Bided its time well, don't you think?"

"Doc?" Wanda pleaded.

But Doc wouldn't look at her. "Even if there was any way we could let you outside, Wanda… I just couldn't trust drugs I don't understand. Jamie's a tough kid. His system will fight this off."

I trusted Wanda. I knew she wasn't trying to trick us. She couldn't have known this would happen, so she couldn't have planned it, and she loved Jamie. I knew that and I knew that right now all she wanted was for him to get well. But there was nothing to do. They might hurt her if she tried and no one else, not even Jeb, wanted to test out this new theory of hers.

"We'll go out again, Wanda," I murmured. "We'll find something. We won't come back until we do."

"That's not good enough," she said. The tears that had been forming in her eyes were already beginning to fall onto her cheeks. She turned away from me and looked at Jared. "Jared. You know. You _know_ I would never let anything hurt Jamie. You know I can do this. Please."

He looked at her, then at everyone else in the room, and everyone outside in the hall. He was weighing his options, making a decision. Then he finally made up his mind.

"No, Wanda," he said softly. "No."

Wanda fell to the ground, crushed by lack of trust, lack of hope. I tired to pull her back up, but she twisted her arm out of my grip and crawled over to Jamie's side. She elbowed Trudy out of the way and began wiping Jamie's forehead with a wet rag.

She sobbed his name, "Jamie, Jamie, Jamie," over and over again.

When almost everyone had left, I knelt beside her. She needed to know I trusted her, that I didn't agree with them. I was just concerned for her safety.

"I know you wouldn't…," I whispered, "but Wanda, they'll kill you if you try. After what happened… in the hospital. They're afraid you have good reason to destroy us.… Anyway, he'll be all right. You have to trust that."

I tried to comfort her, but it didn't work. She turned away and refused to look at me, so I left her alone.

It was late and Wanda wasn't speaking to me, or anyone for that matter, so I decided to go to sleep. I fell asleep that night feeling like a traitor. Like I did nothing to help her when she needed it most. Which is true. She needed support, a friend, someone to trust her and I didn't step up the way I should have. But I couldn't let her get hurt and she would have. Someone would have hurt her if we had agreed to let her go. They would have tried to kill her.

There was a loud thud and I blinked my eyes open. It was still dark and I couldn't see anything.

"What..." I groaned, blinking my eyes a few more timed to clear away the grogginess. But it was still too dark to see.

"What happened? Where is the parasite?" Kyle yelled from the hallway.

I jumped to my feet and ran out the door to see what he was talking about. When I got into the hall I saw Jeb and Doc standing by Jared's room.

"What?" I said, maybe a little too loudly, but I didn't really care. Something had happened and I wanted to know what.

"Jared chloroformed Doc and left with Wanda, maybe a half hour ago," Jeb explained.

Jared left with Wanda? Then it dawned on me. He took her to get medicine for Jamie. He trusted her. Because it was for the kid he let her try.

"He just left with her." I shook my head, gritting my teeth and taking a deep breath. "If anything happens to her, I swear..."

"Ian, I don't think she's the one in danger here," Kyle said in a low voice. "The Seekers will be coming."

"Wanda would never do that, Kyle," I said. "She would never."

How could they think that? Had she ever tried to get away before? No. It was impossible for her to lie. And she was the best person I'd ever known. There was no way she could ever do anything to hurt us.

"You're even stupider than I thought," he hissed.

I narrowed my eyes and stepped toward him. I was sick of his attitude. He was such a jackass to Wanda before in Jamie's room and now to start this again. Now. I was done listening to his crap.

"Now, everyone just calm down, ya hear me?" Jeb ordered.

I sighed and stepped away from Kyle. Jeb was right. Now was the not the time to get into a fight with Kyle.

Kyle turned to Jeb. "Well, what are we going to do?" he asked.

"We're gonna wait and see what happens," Jeb answered.

Great. Well, at least they weren't going to try to track them down in the desert. If they were still out there. But Jared wasn't stupid, he'd keep Wanda safe if only to keep his Melanie safe. She'd be alright. She'd be home soon and she'd be fine.

And all I had to do was wait and make sure that no one tried to kill her when she got back.


	19. Healed

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Sorry that it took so long to get this chapter out, guys. I'm at the slow part in the book and it gets tedious, but next chapter should be quicker. They'll be on the raid and it will be more fun to write.**

**Anyway, who saw the series finale of LOST the other night? I thought it was great. I loved how it flipped the focus from the island to Jack. It was a great way to leave some mystery to the island and to have a happy ending, considering the circumstances.**

**Well, hope you guys enjoy this chapter. I would have probably given up writing it ages ago if I didn't have the constant encouragement of your reviews. Thanks a lot :)**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 19_

This was hell. How much longer could I take this?

It had been hours since Jared ran out of here with Wanda. They had to be back soon. I couldn't take anymore of this. Kyle and the rest of them were trying to come up with a plan for when the Seekers came. I had only argued for a few minutes―told them that the Seekers weren't coming, that Wanda wasn't going to call them―before giving up. No one was listening.

I couldn't really blame them. I understood why they were scared. Wanda had just seen a pretty bad side of us―we killed, _maimed_, souls, while she was in the other room, blissfully unaware. And now, _now_ she was outside. Back in her world. Everyone, even the people who liked her, her friends, thought she might turn us in. That maybe she might think it a suitable punishment, an eye for an eye. But Wanda wasn't like that. No matter what we did, she couldn't possibly hand us over to the Seekers. Wanda wasn't vengeful, she didn't know how to be.

But she probably should be. After everything we did to her―I tried to... to kill her, and so did Kyle, Jared hit her, everyone of us had hated her to the point of wanting her dead, and now she caught us red handed, murdering souls―she should be spiteful, she _should_ turn us in. Most people probably would have. But the thought would never even cross Wanda's mind. I knew that.

I hoped that maybe _I_ might have something to do with that. That she cared about me enough to not want me dead. No, I _knew_ she did, but I also knew it wasn't like what she felt for Jared. He was the reason, Jared and Jamie were the reason she would never turn the rest of us in, no matter what we did to her. She loved _them_ too much.

I knew the Seekers weren't coming, but still, I couldn't relax. This was dangerous. Wanda shouldn't be out on a raid. If the Seekers caught her... She had told me once that they could send her away, to another planet. They'd try to get her away from the bad influences.

And then what?

I'd lose her. And Jared would lose Melanie, and the Seekers might find us. This was dangerous.

It mad me angry that everyone was mad at Wanda, afraid of what she might do, but the one they should be mad at was Jared. This was his brilliant idea. If the Seekers came it was his fault. A few of the others were mad at him, but they were arguing that he was only trying to save Jamie. Of course he was, and that was what Wanda was doing, too. If they could pardon his actions, why not her's? Jared planned this, not Wanda. And, no matter how dangerous, Wanda would never say no to Jared. I don't think that's possible for her. I don't think Wanda could say no to anyone.

I sat outside for awhile that night, waiting to see the jeep pull into the caves. I waited until Brandt and Aaron came to relieve me, then I went back to the kitchen where almost everyone was still discussing our problem. It didn't matter. Inside or out, I was still worried. And angry at Jared. If something happened to Wanda...

I was pulled out of my thoughts when I heard footsteps coming toward the kitchen. Whoever it was was running. Everyone in the room, including me, held their breath.

Brandt burst into the room. "They're back! Jared's back!" he shouted.

I had been sitting against one of the stone counters, but as soon as the words left Brandt's mouth, I was on my feet.

"The Seekers?" Kyle asked.

I rolled my eyes, but waited for the answer. Something could have happened...

"None that we can see. Just the jeep," Brandt announced. "Jared eyes were normal."

I let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding and ran out of the room, toward the entrance. I could hear footsteps behind me, getting closer, then I saw Kyle pass me. He wasn't much faster than me, and I stayed close until Jared came into view. Then I could see a figure slumped over his shoulder.

"Jared, you _idiot_." Kyle boomed. "What were you thinking?"

I heard Jeb tell him to relax, but I couldn't focus on them. Why was Jared carrying Wanda?

"Is she hurt?" I asked him.

"Get out of my way," Jared said, walking past us. "I'm in a hurry. Wanda's in perfect shape, but she insisted on being blindfolded. How is Jamie?"

Of course Wanda would insist on being blindfolded. _Of course_ she wouldn't want to know the way in and out of the caves. She didn't care. All she wanted was to help Jamie, and she didn't need to know the way out of the caves to do it.

"Hot," Jeb answered Jared's question.

"Wanda's got what we need." Jared was moving fast now, down the tunnel toward Jamie. Wanda was bouncing up and down with every step he took. She couldn't have been comfortable.

"I can carry her," I said.

But Jared wasn't about to stop. "She's fine where she is."

"I'm really okay," Wanda murmured from Jared's shoulder. He was still jostling her with every step.

There was an angry hiss when we reached the main plaza. Almost everyone was there, and they were clearly upset. They were asking what had happened, why Jared would take such a risk―stupid questions that they didn't need the answers to right now. Not while Jamie needed medicine so desperately. Jared just pushed through them, ordering them out of his way. Jeb, Kyle and I all followed along until we reached Jamie's room.

Jared slid Wanda to the floor when they reached the door of the room and she followed him inside. Sharon and Maggie were both crouched near Jamie, along with Doc, but when Sharon saw Jared, she leapt at him, trying to scratch his face with her nails. Jared just sidestepped her, caught her arm, spinning her into a headlock.

"Let her go!" Doc cried from his spot next to Jamie.

But Jared ignored him. "Wanda―heal him!"

Doc stepped out in front of Wanda, to keep her from Jamie, but he never took his eyes off of Sharon.

"Doc," Wanda said. She sounded scared, because of all the conflict and Jamie's sickly appearance, I guessed. "I need your help. Please. For Jamie."

When Doc didn't stand aside, I walked up beside Wanda, placing a hand on her shoulder in support. "C'mon, Doc. You gonna let the kid die for your pride?"

"It's not pride," Doc defended. "You don't know what these foreign substances will do to him!"

"He can't get much worse, can he?"

"Doc," Wanda said. "Look at my face."

Doc's eyes shifted from me to Wanda, and then I looked at her as well. I didn't see anything, though. Just Melanie's normal complexion. Nothing else.

But something _was_ different.

The scar. The one Wanda got when Jared hit her, and then I made it worse by grinding her face against the rock in the river room when I was trying to save Kyle.

The scar wasn't there. Just smooth, pink skin―fresh, like after a scab falls off.

Her face was perfect again.

"How?" Doc wanted an explanation as much as the rest of us did. How could anything, even plastic surgery have taken away that scar? And in only a few hours?

"I'll show you," Wanda promised. "Please. Jamie doesn't need to suffer."

Doc watched Wanda's face for a moment before letting out a sigh. "Ian's right―he can't get much worse. If this kills him…" He shrugged, and then moved out of the way.

"No," Sharon cried, but no one was paying attention.

Wanda knelt beside Jamie and started rummaging through a backpack she carried. Inside were all kinds of little white bottles. The kinds we saw in some of the houses. Not the same exact ones, but they all looked similar. She worked on Jamie while Doc and I helped.

Whatever she was giving the kid worked, and fast. One minute, his face was red with fever, the next he was looking healthy as a horse. He woke up halfway through and was talking like nothing had been wrong in the first place. He didn't feel a thing as Wanda and Doc cleaned out the infected wound and sealed it with something that worked like superglue for cuts. It healed it right up, and then Wanda brushed some powder over his leg and the scar began to fade to a light pink line on his thigh.

"But don't scars impress girls?" Jamie chuckled when it was all over. "Where did you get this stuff, Wanda? It's like magic."

I couldn't have described it better. The medicine did work like magic, and Wanda had gotten it for us. She really did it. She said she could save Jamie and she did it. She was incredible.

"Jared took me on a raid," she answered.

"Seriously? That's _awesome_." It was good to see Jamie so enthusiastic. Just a few minutes ago he was fighting for his life, and now he was his same old self again.

"You should have seen her," Jared said. "She was incredible."

Wanda turned to look at him and then she looked toward the door. Sharon and Maggie were just leaving the room. Wanda's expression fell for just a moment, but then she turned back to Jamie and Jared. I couldn't believe that Sharon and Maggie could just leave like that. Jamie was _their_ family, too. They should be here, with him, but instead their hatred prevented them from rejoicing in the fact that the kid was alive. It was just sad.

"She walked right into a hospital, right up to the alien there, and asked them to treat her injuries, bold as anything," Jared was saying. "Then, when they turned their backs, she robbed them blind! Walked right out of there with medicine enough to last us all for a long time. She even waved at the bugger behind the counter as she drove away." Jared laughed.

Jamie stared at Wanda, wide-eyed. He was clearly enjoying Jared's story.

"It wasn't that exciting, really," Wanda told him, as he took her hand. "It was very easy. I'm a bugger, too, after all."

"I didn't mean―" Jared started to apologize, but Wanda waved him off. She wasn't offended in the least by his thoughtless comment.

"How did you explain the scar on your face?" Doc asked. It was a good question. "Didn't they wonder why you hadn't ―"

"I had to have fresh injuries, of course. I was careful to leave them nothing to be suspicious about. I told them I'd fallen with a knife in my hand." She nudged Jamie with her elbow. Joking. "It could happen to anyone."

But it wasn't funny. Sure, of course she would do what she had to in order to help. Even if that included hurting herself in the process. What _wouldn't_ she do to help someone?

_Nothing_, I concluded. She would do absolutely everything in her power to help us. It didn't matter what it was, or what it cost her. She would still do it, because that's who she was.

"Fresh injuries?" I asked, wanting to know exactly what she meant. What did she have to do to get that medicine for us?

She stared at me in surprise. I suppose I looked mad. Well, I was mad. She shouldn't be getting herself hurt for us.

"It was necessary," she explained. "I had to hide my scar. And learn how to heal Jamie."

Jared took her wrist in his hand and began stroking a faint pink line on her arm, just like the one that now appeared on Jamie's leg. "It was horrible," he said. "She about hacked her hand off. I thought she'd never use it again."

"You cut yourself?" Jamie asked, looking horrified. At least someone here was having the right reaction.

"Don't be anxious―it wasn't that bad," Wanda tried to soothe him, to keep him from getting too upset. "I knew it would be healed quickly."

I ran my fingers along her cheek, the newly healed one. The one she must have cut up in order to hide her scar―I refused to think just how she managed to cut half her face off removing that scar. I left my hand there, resting on her cheek, and she leaned into it, smiling slightly.

My heart jumped in my chest at the simple gesture. "No more raids for you," I murmured.

"Of course she'll go out again," Jared said. He sounded surprised. "Ian, she was absolutely phenomenal. You'd have to see to really understand. I'm only just beginning to guess at all the possibilities―"

"Possibilities?" I asked in disbelief. Wasn't he at all concerned that she had injured herself? I slid my hand from Wanda's cheek to her shoulder, pulling her closer to me. "At what cost to her? You _let_ her almost _hack_ her own _hand_ off?"

"No, Ian, it wasn't like that," Wanda said. "It was my idea. I had to."

She was defending him. _Of course_ she was.

"Of course it was your idea," I growled. "You'd do anything.… You have no _limits_ when it comes to these two. But Jared shouldn't have let you ―"

"What other way was there, Ian?" Jared argued. "Did you have a better plan? Do you think she'd be happier if she was unhurt but Jamie was gone?"

I felt Wanda flinch beside. When I spoke again I had regained some of my composure, because Jared was right. "No. But I don't understand how you could sit there and watch her do that to herself." I shook my head. Disgusted that he could let her do something like that. Even if he hated Wanda, which I knew that he didn't, how could he have let her hurt Melanie's body that way. That should have been enough for him to keep Wanda from hurting herself. "What kind of a man ―"

"A practical one," Jeb interrupted me. He was holding a big cardboard box in his hands.

"It's why Jared's the best at getting what we need," he continued. "Because he can do what has to be done. Or watch what has to be done. Even when watching's harder than doing."

"Now, I know it's closer to breakfast than supper, but I figured some of you haven't eaten in a while," Jeb changed the subject. "Hungry, kid?"

"Uh… I'm not sure," Jamie said. "I feel real hollow, but it doesn't feel… _bad_."

"It's the No Pain," Wanda explained. "You should eat."

"And drink," Doc added. "You need liquids."

Jeb dropped the box onto the mattress. "Thought we might have a bit of a celebration. Dig in."

And we did.

The box was filled with dehydrated meals. All kinds. Jamie wanted the spaghetti. Jeb took the garlic chicken. We all crammed into Jamie's small room, circled around, eating and laughing with one another.

I sat beside Wanda, my arm around her shoulders. Jared was on her other side, still holding her wrist. Wanda was holding Jamie on her lap. The kid didn't seem to mind, and after what Wanda had been through the last couple of days, I was sure he wouldn't have complained even if he did mind. Even Kyle was there, sitting beside me. He was laughing along with the rest of us.

It was almost like we were a real family. At that moment, Wanda wasn't an outsider, she wasn't an alien. She was every bit a part of this community. Maybe even more so than some of the people here.

As people began to leave for there rooms―it was late, and we'd all had an eventful couple of days―there was room enough for those of us that remained to stretch out a bit. We ended up all lying together on the floor. My head was on Wanda's stomach as she lay there, her head on Jared's, her arm around Jamie.

The others were lying around us, even Kyle. Doc was snoring. Jeb was on the bed. But Wanda and Jared were the only two I was aware of. Wanda because I could feel every move she made. My head rose and fell with her breathing. I held her hand to my cheek, feeling her soft palm against my face, her delicate fingers in mine.

Jared I was aware of for a different reason. While I understood why he and Wanda would always be close, always care for each other, it didn't mean I liked it. I didn't want to share her with Jared, and that's exactly what we were doing. I was very aware of the way her breathing faltered whenever Jared stroked her hair. But there was nothing to do about it. She loved Jared because Melanie loved Jared. Nothing could change that, not while she was in that body. Not unless she left us and got a new body, or left this world, and I'd rather deal with the jealousy than not have her in my life at all.

Jeb belched, loudly. Kyle started laughing.

"Nicer night than I was plannin' for," Jeb said. "I like it when pessimism goes unrewarded. Thanks, Wanda."

"Mmm," Wanda sighed, half asleep. How anyone could ever be afraid of her I'd never know.

"Next time she raids…" Kyle said, and then he yawned. "Next time she raids, I'm coming, too."

"She's not going out again," I said. Wanda could tell that I was tense and brushed her hand across my cheek to calm me. It felt good, and it almost worked, but then she spoke.

"Of course not," she murmured. "I don't have to go anywhere unless I'm needed. I don't mind staying in here."

Didn't she understand that I just didn't want her to get hurt? Because if she went out on raids with us, that's exactly what would end up happening. If something were to happen out there, Wanda wouldn't hesitate an instant before putting herself in harm's way to save us.

"I'm not talking about keeping you prisoner, Wanda," I explained. My voice was more agitated than I meant for it to be. "You can go anywhere you want as far as I'm concerned. Jogging on the highway, if you'd like that. But not a raid. I'm talking about keeping you safe."

"We need her," Jared said, stubborn as ever.

"We got by fine without her before."

"Fine?" Jared questioned. "Jamie would have died without her. She can get things for us that no one else can."

I was tensing to get up and I could tell Jared was doing the same. The only thing that was keeping me down was Wanda's hand on my cheek. She was trying to restrain me with that hand.

"She's a person, Jared, not a tool," I reminded him.

Jared lost some of his steam when he answered. "I know that. I didn't say that ―"

"'S up to Wanda, I'd say." Jeb interrupted our argument.

"You can't leave it up to her, Jeb," I protested. Wanda would just choose to help. That's how she was, she wouldn't think about what she wanted at all, just what we wanted.

"Why not? Seems like she's got her own mind," Jeb countered. "'S it your job to make decisions for her?"

"I'll tell you why not," I grumbled under my breath. "Wanda?"

"Yes, Ian?" she answered.

"Do you _want_ to go out on raids?"

"If I can help, of course I should go," she said, just like I knew she would.

"That's not what I asked, Wanda."

She was quiet for a moment.

"See, Jeb?" I said. "She never takes into account her own wants―her own happiness, her own _health_, even. She'd do anything we asked her to, even if it got her killed. It's not fair to ask her things the way we'd ask each other. _We_ stop to think about ourselves. She doesn't."

Everyone was quiet then. I figured I had made my point. Jeb and Jared weren't disagreeing.

"That's not true," Wanda said. And here was the argument I expected from her. "I think about myself all the time. And I… I _want_ to help. Doesn't that count? It made me so happy to help Jamie tonight. Can't I find happiness the way _I_ want to?"

"See what I mean?" I sighed.

"Well, I can't tell her she can't go if she wants to," Jeb said. "She's not a prisoner anymore."

"But we don't have to ask."

"You don't need to ask," Wanda said. "I volunteer. It really wasn't… frightening. Not at all. The other souls are very kind. I'm not afraid of them. It was almost too easy."

"Easy?" I asked, incredulous. "Cutting your ―"

She interrupted me before I could really get going. "That was an emergency. I won't have to do that again." She paused for a moment. "Right?" she said, checking.

I wasn't going to win this one, I could tell. Not that I ever won an argument with Wanda. She was stubborn, and she was going to be extra stubborn about this. If she _could_ help, she wouldn't rest until she did. And Jeb seemed to agree that she should go on raids if she wanted to. And Jared was clearly for it. Hell, even Kyle wanted her to go. How could I argue with that?

I groaned in defeat. "If she goes, I'm going, too. _Someone_ has to protect her from herself."

"And I'll be there to protect the rest of us from _her_," Kyle laughed. Then someone must have smacked him, because he grunted. "Ow."

I know I didn't hit him―he wasn't close enough or else I would have―so my bet my was on Jared.

"And I'll be there to bring you all back alive," Jared murmured.


	20. Raiding

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Okay, so here's chapter 20. Hope you guys enjoy!**

**And I'm posting a one-shot about a conversation Ian has with Sharon regarding his relationship with Wanda. It was originally supposed to fit into this story at some point, but I never used it. It's short, but I've always liked it, so check it out.**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 20_

Jared was right about one thing.

Wanda really was phenomenal when she was raiding.

She said it wasn't anything special, that she was just going shopping, but it was special. Maybe she didn't understand what raids had been like for us before, although she must have had a pretty good idea from Melanie what it was like. The fear. Hell, she may have only been grocery shopping, but Wanda understood what it was like for us out here. Even sitting here, in the back of the windowless van, driving through Kansas, the anxiety was intense. If just one soul noticed something off about us, saw what we really were, if they notified the Seekers, it would all be over.

But for right now we were safe. Kyle and I were sorting through the supplies Wanda picked up, while Jared drove us toward Oklahoma City. Kyle complained that raiding was too easy now, that it wasn't fun anymore. I never really thought raiding was much fun. I mean, it was dangerous, we were constantly on guard. We barely slept, and when we did it was usually outside in the woods or stuffed in the back of the van with four other guys. But Kyle had always enjoyed the rush he got from raiding. He liked the danger.

Personally, I liked this better. I still wasn't happy about Wanda being out and risking her life, but she was good at it. She acted so naturally when she interacted with the souls. She wasn't afraid of them, and they seemed to be nice enough. Some of them were a little too nice on occasion, but Wanda figured out how to deal with that quickly.

The first time we had stopped at a store to get supplies, Wanda had realized she would need a cover story. She wasn't much of a liar, but the story she came up with seemed believable enough. Whenever a soul would ask her about herself she'd tell them she was a photographer and she traveled a lot. She said everyone she spoke to believed it, no one ever seemed suspicious. But after a few stores she realized that it was better if she told them she was traveling with her partner, and that he was the photographer. It saved her time when she was speaking to men. Apparently, a soul in a man's body is still just a man.

After a few stops, and a few days, we had also realized that Wanda was going to need a shower. The souls would get suspicious if Wanda looked like she hadn't bathed in a while. Jared decided we'd try stopping at a motel. Kyle hated the idea and refused to get out of the van, he said he'd stay up and keep guard.

The room looked the same way I remembered hotel rooms looking. An average-sized room, two full beds, a small bathroom. Colorful, abstract wallpaper on the walls. Cheesy, generic paintings over the beds. It was all exactly the same, but at the same time, completely foreign. I couldn't remember the last time I'd stayed in a hotel. Or in a house for that matter.

Seeing the two beds I realized that we were going to have a problem. Jared would sleep in one, I'd sleep in the other. Wanda would be left to decide who she wanted to share with. She was too much of a worrier for that. No matter which of us she chose, she'd stay up all night worrying that she'd upset the other. I told Jared all of this while Wanda was in the shower.

Jared's response was, "Jealous again?"

"Not this time. I just know how she thinks."

Jared was quiet for a moment, then he looked resigned. "Fine," he snapped. "But if you try cuddling up to me tonight… so help me, O'Shea."

I laughed. "Not to sound overly arrogant, but to be perfectly honest, Jared, were I so inclined, I think I could do better."

Jared ignored my joke, but at least he wasn't arguing with me.

From then on Wanda slept by herself in one bed while Jared and I shared the other. It wasn't comfortable―sometimes I have a tendency to sprawl while I sleep and Jared would punch me whenever I did―but it was better for Wanda.

We were almost finished with the raid. Just a few more days and then we'd be home. We still had a few more stores to hit, but we only had to stay in one more hotel. That was good, it freaked us all out a little to have to sleep in them. It went against every instinct I had to fall asleep in the open like that. I mean, no one really paid us any attention or looked at us even, but it still made me anxious.

We had done good today, gotten more than we expected, so when I noticed how tired Wanda looked we stopped early. Wanda checked us into a room and then came back to the van for me and Jared. We parked close to the room and Jared carried in a suitcase―it held some clothes for Wanda and our dinner, chicken strips from a deli we had stopped at―while Wanda and I followed.

That was another thing that was great about raiding with Wanda, we got to eat perishable food. Real food. The kind that doesn't last very long unrefrigerated. Deli sandwiches, chicken, anything we wanted. Not that we asked her for anything. Wanda would even come back with snacks for us. She had asked us what are favorites were. Jared and I told her she didn't have to worry about it, but she insisted. Kyle didn't hesitate, though.

"Anything caramel," he'd said.

Wanda smiled and then looked at me questioningly. I told her I liked mint chocolate chip ice cream.

Jared said he didn't care, he'd eat anything. But that was Jared for you. He didn't seem like the kind of guy who cared much what he was eating, as long as there was food enough for everyone, he was happy. I admired that about him. That's why he was good at this life. He had priorities, and he never lost focus.

The moment Wanda had come back with that ice cream, though, I forgot all about Jared and his focus. I hadn't had ice cream in six years and it tasted _so_ good. Wanda laughed at me when I dug into the carton. I offered her some, but she said it was more fun watching me eat it.

When we were in our room, I relaxed on the bed I would have to share with Jared and turned on the TV. Jared took out the chicken strips and passed them around. Wanda took hers and went to sit by the window.

I began flipping through the channels. There was nothing good on anymore. They used to play some old human shows, but now it was all soul soap opera crap. There was no such thing as action anymore. No drama, no suspense, no thrillers. Horror movies were definitely out.

"You have to admit, Wanda, we humans had better entertainment," I teased.

She looked at the television for a moment, at the actors who were speaking. I had seen one of them before, although I couldn't remember his name. He'd been in a movie I'd seen once. Now he was a soul, playing the part of another soul who'd finally found the partner he'd been separated from.

Wanda shrugged. "You have to consider the intended audience."

"True. I wish they'd run old human shows again." I changed the channel and frowned when I only found more of the same on the next station. "Used to be a few of them on."

"They were too disturbing. They had to be replaced with things that weren't so… violent."

"_The Brady Bunch_?" I asked her, incredulously. There wasn't a more family friendly show _ever_, in the entire history of television.

Wanda laughed. "It condoned aggression," she countered. "I remember one where a little male child punched a bully, and that was portrayed as being the right thing to do. There was blood."

I shook my head and went back to the show about the star-crossed souls. How could any living beings, even souls, be so innocent? Especially ones that took over entire worlds? Sure, they can take over the lives of six billion people, but Bobby Brady draws a little blood from a bully and they can't take it.

"What are you staring at, Wanda?" Jared asked after a minute.

"Something I've never seen in all my lives," she said, smiling. "I'm staring at… hope."

Jared walked over to her and looked out the window. "What do you mean?"

She caught his chin and pointed him in the right direction. "Look."

"What am I looking at?"

"The only hope for survival I've ever seen for a host species."

I got up from the bed, leaving the souls on TV behind, and went to see what Wanda was talking about.

"Where?" Jared asked. He sounded as confused as I was. I didn't see anything out there.

"See?" Wanda pointed across the street at a couple of souls on a playground. They were swinging their baby on the swings. "See how she loves her human child?"

The woman across the street grabbed her baby out of the swing and hugged him, kissing his face while he laughed.

Jared sucked in a breath. "The baby is human? How? Why? For how long?"

Wanda shrugged. "I've never seen this before―I don't know. She has not given him up for a host. I can't imagine that she would be… forced. Motherhood is all but worshipped among my kind. If she is unwilling… I have no idea how that will be handled. This doesn't happen elsewhere. The emotions of these bodies are so much stronger than logic."

I was aware of Wanda watching me and Jared stare at the family across the street. I knew my mouth was hanging wide open, but I was too distracted to close it. The souls at the playground had a human child. If they hadn't had a soul placed in him yet, that could mean they wouldn't have one placed in him. That meant that they loved him, a _human_.

"No," Wanda murmured. "No one would force the parents if they wanted the child. And just _look_ at them."

The father had joined his wife and son. He put his arms around the both of them and looked at his son. The look in his eyes was one of love and adoration. The same look I'd seen on human parents. I'd seen that look on my cousin Paul, when his son was born.

Wanda was talking about why she thought parenthood was different on Earth from other planets, but I wasn't really listening. The mother looked up at her husband and he kissed her. Their baby flailed his arms, laughing.

"Hmm. Perhaps, someday, some of my kind and some of yours will live in peace," Wanda said. "Wouldn't that be… strange?"

I didn't say anything, I just watched as the couple left the playground and walked, hand in hand, back to the apartments down the street.

That was something I thought I'd never have. A family. But maybe it wasn't such a far stretch to believe that it might happen one day. I already found the girl, right?

I swallowed the lump that formed in my throat. No. I loved Wanda, and I would love to have a family with her someday, but it wasn't going to happen. There was still Melanie and Jared to consider.

But, at least, maybe our species wasn't doomed like we thought. Maybe Wanda was right, that family was hope for the rest of us. They had a human baby that they loved. I was in love with a soul. What was to stop other humans and souls from forming relationships. Not all humans were bad, as was proved by our little group. And souls were just confused about what it is to be human. Wanda understood us better now, after having spent time around us. She understood we weren't all blood thirsty savages who's soul pleasure came from fighting.

A few days later we were making our way home, back to the caves. I was in the moving truck we stored all the food in, with Kyle. Wanda and Jared were taking turns driving the van. They were ahead of us, and we lost sight of them around a wide turn in the road. We'd catch up soon enough, we were almost home.

But when we finally did see taillights, something was wrong. There were two sets, one on either side of the rode. Parked. One car had a spotlight shining out at the van across the street. The van that Wanda and Jared were in.

They'd gotten themselves pulled over by Seekers!

"Kyle!" I shouted, sitting up straight in the passenger seat.

"I know," he said. "I see them."

I strained my eyes, trying to see what was happening. The van was getting closer, but all I could see was the Seeker standing near the drivers side window. He looked like he was just talking to someone in the van, probably Wanda. The Seeker would have already called for backup if he had seen Jared.

That meant Wanda was trying to _talk_ to the Seeker. She was trying to lie, to keep him from discovering Jared. Wanda couldn't lie to save her life and now that's exactly what she was trying to do. She was lying to save her life and the life of every single person back in the caves.

"Kyle, you have to stop," I said.

"I don't think that's a good idea―"

"You're gonna just leave _Jared_?" I asked. If he wouldn't help Wanda, he might help Jared.

"Ian, that Seeker's probably already called for backup," Kyle snapped. "Look," he added when I started to get upset, "she's fine. The Seeker's not after her. She's not the one you need to worry about right now."

He was wrong, of course. Wanda was the one I needed to worry about. She'd get herself killed to save Jared. But as we approached the van, Kyle started to slow down.

I could see the Seeker, standing next to the drivers window. And I could see Wanda, leaning out, inhaling something the Seeker sprayed. Panic shot through my body. I couldn't see what he had sprayed, but Wanda didn't fall limp the way I was expecting. Instead she turned around and smiled. Her eyes reflected our headlights back at us, the same way the Seeker's did as he waved us forward.

By now Kyle had stopped the truck completely, idling in the middle of the road. "You see that!" he said, through gritted teeth. He was trying not to move at all. "I told you what she would do!"

"She's not doing anything!" I wanted to hit him, but the Seeker might notice that, so I followed his lead and kept still. "She wouldn't―"

"Jared's probably dead already!" he interrupted.

The Seeker turned back toward our truck to wave us forward again. He looked a little irritated to have to tell us more than once. That was when Kyle realized that we should get out of there. He kicked the truck into first gear and started to pull forward.

"Kyle, stop," I pleaded. "What if they need our help?"

And when he huffed in disbelief, I asked, "What about Jared? He's saved _you_ before!"

He didn't say anything, just kept driving.

Kyle and I both kept perfectly still, facing forward as we drove passed the Seeker's car. I glanced at Wanda out of the corner of my eye as we drove by. She was looking up at me, and she looked relieved.

Once we'd passed the van and the Seeker's car, Kyle kept the truck slow.

"If they catch us, I'd rather they do it out here. Away from the caves," he said.

That surprised me, a little. I would of figured he'd want to hightail it out of the area as fast as he could to avoid the Seekers. He was... growing up, maybe. Becoming more mature, I guess.

"They didn't come after us, did they?" I asked.

He shook his head and gave me a sideways glance.

"She didn't give us up, Kyle," I told him, flatly.

No, she hadn't given us up to the Seeker. I was sure of it. But what did she have to do to keep him from noticing that Jared was human? What was that stuff he sprayed at her? Seeker's spraying things in people's faces was normally a bad thing.

"If you're so sure, than why do you look so worried?" Kyle demanded. He'd already regained his composure, while I, on the other hand, had not.

It was then that I realized I was breathing too fast, too loudly to be considered normal. I swallowed once, hard, and then took a deep breath.

"Ian, I don't get you," Kyle said, his attention on the dark road ahead. "You have every faith in her that she didn't just sell us out to the Seeker, but your worried she couldn't talk her way out of a speeding ticket?" He was teasing now, but I could hear the effort it was taking him.

He wasn't convinced about Wanda. Not yet.

I took another breath, grateful for his attempt at being my normal, annoying brother. Then I looked out my window and my breathing stopped.

The van's headlights were coming up behind us, then they were passing us. I leaned around Kyle, just in time to see Jared shine a flashlight into his eyes, showing us he was still human the only way we'd believe. But I wasn't looking at Jared.

Wanda smiled at me from her seat, but I couldn't smile back. When I saw the Seeker spray that bottle in her face I thought that was it, it was over. I thought they'd take her out of Melanie's body and send her away. I thought I'd never see her again.

We drove back to the caves in silence, but I knew Kyle was just waiting to get back before he started ranting. And as soon as we got out of the truck, he started.

"What happened?" he demanded.

Wanda turned to look at him. She looked awful. Her eyes were welled up and tears were streaming down her face. Jared was standing next to her, his hand on her shoulder. Didn't he understand that she needed more than that?

I strode quickly to her side, wrapping my arms around her. I pulled her close to me, loving the way she held on to me, but hating how she cried into my shirt. She shouldn't have had to go through that.

"It's okay. You did great. It's over," I murmured close to her ear.

"Seeker's not the problem, Ian," Jared said.

"Huh?" I was confused.

"They were watching the road for a reason. Sounds like Doc's been… working in our absence."

"Why those ― !" I could feel Wanda shuddering at the thought of Doc's work and was suddenly to angry to speak. I gritted my teeth together.

"Nice," Kyle said, sarcastically. "Idiots. We're gone for a few weeks, and they've got the Seekers on patrol. They could have just asked us to ―"

"Shut up, Kyle," Jared spit. "That's neither here nor there at the moment. We've got to get this all unloaded fast. Who knows how many are watching for us? Let's grab a load and then get some more hands."

Wanda pulled away from our embrace to help carry in the supplies. I stayed close to her, though. She picked up a large flat of canned soup and I took it from her, giving her, instead, a big box of pasta. Then we all started into the caves together.

About halfway in, a voice rang put in the darkness. It was usual for people to greet us after a long trip, and this time it was Jamie. He would, of course, want to be the first to welcome Wanda and Jared home.

"They're back… ack… back!" Jamie was shouting. His voice echoing off the stone walls.

I watched Wanda wipe her cheek on her shoulder, trying to dry her tears. She didn't want to upset Jamie, but as Jamie approached, it seemed he was already upset.

The kid's eyes were bloodshot and old tears stained his dirty face.

"Jamie?" Both Wanda and Jared said, dropping their boxes simultaneously.

Jamie ran to Wanda, clinging to her as he sobbed.

"Oh, Wanda! Oh, Jared! Wes is dead! He's _dead_! The Seeker killed him!"


	21. New Addition

**Stephenie Meyer owns The Host.**

**Wow! Sorry it took forever for this chapter. And it's not even that good. It's at a weird part that doesn't really have too much to do with Ian. But I hope you like it anyway. I lost most of this chapter after a bug crashed the app I was writing in on my iPhone. So I had to start all over again from scratch. That'll teach me to back things up from now on. Once again, sorry. I totally understand if you all hate me, but I promise to make it up to you.**

**Blurring The Lines**  
Chapter 21

Wes was dead.

He was gone. He had been killed by the Seeker four days ago. There was nothing I could have done for him. She had shot him in the head. Wes was killed instantly.

Everyone was gathered in the kitchen and Jeb and the others were explaining what happened to Jared, Kyle, and myself. Wanda was sitting a ways down from the rest of us with Jamie. She was crying, had been since before we arrived home. And when Jamie told us what had happened, she had started crying all over again. This time, instead of for the souls she thought had been killed, she cried for her human friend.

I wanted to comfort her, to wrap my arms around her and tell her everything would be alright. It wouldn't be alright, Wes was gone, but the comforting thought might help lull her to sleep. She needed to sleep. But Jamie was with her, and I was in the middle of being debriefed by Jeb.

Apparently the Seeker had come barreling through the desert in her SUV, getting to close for comfort. Wes, Aaron, Brandt and a few others went out to stop her. She ended up killing Wes and seriously injuring Brandt before were able to take her down. Doc had fixed Brandt up and now he and Aaron were guarding her.

They had only waited to kill the Seeker to see if Wanda wanted to speak with her. Which, of course, made Wanda feel as if she had to speak with the Seeker. I wanted to go with her, but, before she left, she shot me a look that stopped me dead in my tracks. She looked at Jamie, too, who, apparently, had the same idea. She wanted to be alone, or she didn't want me or Jamie around the Seeker. Maybe both.

After she left, most of the others made their way out as well until just Jared, Jamie, Kyle and I were left sitting in the once cramped kitchen.

"I can't believe he's gone," I said quietly.

We had talked about how it happened, why it happened, but not a single person discussed the reality of his death since we'd come home. It was like waking up from a bad dream, only I wasn't dreaming. This was real, and there was nothing I could do.

Jared seemed to be thinking along the same lines. "I know. It's... unreal." He paused. "I can't help but think that if we hadn't left, maybe ―"

"If we hadn't left," Kyle interrupted, "than it probably would have been one of us lying in that grave right now."

"I never thought I'd say this," Jamie said, his voice thick from tears, "but Kyle's right. I feel awful about it, but I'm glad none of you were here." By the time he was finished, he was on the verge of tears again.

Jared walked over to where Jamie still sat on the floor—where he had been sitting with Wanda—and pulled the kid into a tight embrace. Jamie lost his fragile control then and began sobbing into Jared's shirt.

After a moment, Kyle got up and walked for the exit. I decided to follow him out, but not before giving Jamie a reassuring pat on his shoulder.

Kyle and I walked in silence until we came to the sleeping tunnels. I knew that I was going to have to talk with Lily ever since hearing what had happened to Wes. Jeb had said she wasn't doing so well, and I might not be able to fix it, but she needed someone to be there for her. If not me, than who? Everyone else would be afraid of her, they wouldn't want to mention it. They wouldn't want to hurt her more, but she needed to talk to someone.

"I'm gonna go see how Lily is doing," I told Kyle.

He nodded solemnly and continued on to our room.

I stopped in front of Lily's door, listening for a sign that she was awake. If she was sleeping I didn't want to wake her and bring her back into this dismal reality. If she was asleep, better to let her remain that way, for at least a while longer. But then I heard a soft sobbing coming through the door and knew she wasn't sleeping.

I slowly opened the door and then closed it behind me. Lily was curled on her bed, her arms clutching her legs. She was almost in a fetal position. I could see and hear the almost silent sobs that racked her body.

Four days was not nearly enough time to get over a tragedy like this, but it was enough time that the shock should have passed. Lily was still in shock. She needed help.

I sat down at the edge of her mattress, reaching out and placing a hand on the foot closest to me. She flinched away.

"Lily?" I said gently.

She murmured something I didn't quite understand.

"What?" I asked, glad that she at least seemed to be responding to me.

This time I heard her. "Why?" was all she said.

"I don't know, Lily. I don't know."

"Why?" she said again, and I was starting to worry she was even worse off that I thought. But than she added, "It's not fair, Ian. What did he do? Nothing. He didn't nothing to deserve this. He was just trying to protect us..."

I placed my hand back on her leg as her voice trailed off. "I know, Lily. I'm so sorry. He didn't deserve to be killed." She flinched at my words. I went on. "Lily, he didn't deserve it, but he wouldn't want to see you this way. You know that."

"He's gone," she cried. "Gone. Why go on? Why does life go on when everything you've ever had is taken from you? Why not just take me too?"

"Lily," I said softly, but firmly. "Lily, you can be sad. You can angry. You can cry for as long as you think you need to. But don't forget why you're here. If you give up, what's to stop the rest of us from doing the same?"

Lily turned and met my eyes for the first time since I walked into the room.

"We've all lost someone, everyone, but we're still here. If we give up, it's over." I smiled weakly. "I don't know about you, but Wes was a fighter. He wouldn't just give up. He'd live. Just like you're gonna do. You're going to miss him, you're going to mourn him, but you're going to continue living. Because he wouldn't want it any other way."

Lily had kept her eyes on mine the entire time I was talking. Now they were bloodshot from crying and lack of sleep, but oddly focused. I watched as tears pooled in her swollen eyes for what was probably the thousandth time in the past few days. I watched as her face broke into a look of utter heartbreak.

"He's gone," she whimpered, sitting up and throwing her arms around my shoulders. I held her as her tears stained my shirt. "He's gone, Ian!"

We sat that way for a long while. Eventually, Lily cried herself to sleep. I thought about going to check on Wanda, I hadn't heard from her since she went with Jeb to speak with the Seeker. I was sure she would be upset, but then I realized I hadn't heard a gunshot. They might have tried to muffle it somehow, to avoid scaring people.

Every time I thought about getting up, Lily would stir and the thought would jump from my mind. I couldn't leave her here alone. Not while she was sleeping. I decided that as soon as she was awake and settled I'd go find out what had happened with the Seeker.

It was early when Lily finally woke up. She still looked exhausted and pained. I offered to bring her something but she declined with a shake of her head. Her lips pressed together in a thin line, trying to keep the tears at bay.

It wasn't working. With a sigh I headed for the kitchen. People were milling around and I figured Wanda might be there. She liked to get up early to help with the dough for the bread.

She wasn't there though. She wasn't in her room, either. Or with Jamie or Jeb or Doc...

Jared was missing too. So was the Jeep.

I was worried. Really worried, but I trusted Jared. He would keep Wanda safe, wherever they had gone. Jamie wasn't worried. He told me that Wanda had asked Jared for help with a raid. She was obviously planning something.

That theory was pretty much confirmed when I spoke to Jeb about the Seeker. He said she'd disappeared last night after speaking to the disgruntled soul. I figured that she must have felt bad about killing her, that's why she left. I had no idea what she was planning on doing though.

That's why I was surprised the next morning when Wanda met me in the kitchen for breakfast. I knew they'd be back, but I wasn't expecting the news she brought with her.

"I removed the Seeker from the human body," Wanda said for the second time.

We were sitting at one of the counters in the kitchen. Jamie was with us, eating some oatmeal that we'd picked up on our raid. We'd finished off the milk and cereal yesterday.

"How?" Jamie asked. "I mean, does it hurt? Did you give her that No Pain stuff so she wouldn't feel it? What did you do with the Seeker once she was out?"

"Jamie," Wanda said quietly. She smiled at him. "Slow down. You eat and I'll explain, alright?"

Jamie took a big spoonful of oatmeal and nodded his head.

"It's very simple. All souls know how to extract a soul, just in case of an emergency. It doesn't hurt, but yes we gave her No Pain. And I talked to Doc and we decided that we could extract the Seeker and send her off planet. If we send her far enough away she won't be able to hurt any of you."

Jamie seemed to like her plan. He shouted a, "That's really cool, Wanda," before going up to refill his bowl.

Wanda turned to look at me then. She looked sad, but I figured that might have had something to do with her feeling like a traitor. Not that she was, not really. She was actually helping the souls. Now that Doc knew how to extract souls he wouldn't have to kill anybody else trying to figure it out.

"I spoke to Jeb about it this morning. He agreed that shipping the souls off would be a good way to handle it," she said. "Jared agreed, too."

"It's a good plan, Wanda." I smiled at her. "You did the right thing."

She smiled a sad smile and then went back to eating her oatmeal.

The Seeker's body belonged to a woman named Lacey. An obnoxious woman named Lacey. I only spoke to her once but she was rude. Mostly about Wanda. She complained about everything. But the people here were bending over backwards to accommodate her. She was a beacon of hope to them. Suddenly, the end wasn't the end anymore. You could come back from the death we all feared.

That night I realized I hadn't seen Kyle all day. Jared noticed the jeep was missing. What else could it have been?

"He's gone after Jodi," I told Jeb and Jared. "What else?"

We were all standing in the kitchen. Me, Jeb, Jared, Wanda, Brandt and Aaron. Discussing my idiot brother's sudden disappearance.

I felt bad for Kyle, I did. If Wanda wasn't Wanda anymore... I don't know what I'd do. But he was such an idiot about it! Why couldn't he just tell someone? I knew the answer to that, no one was stupid enough to actually let him go. Because it was a stupid idea. And idiotic idea. He was endangering us all. Which is what Kyle's best at.

"Well, not much we can do about it now," Jeb drawled.

"So, the raid is still on, then?" Jared asked.

"Yup. Sittin' around here won't keep Kyle from leading the Seeker's back. Might as well make yourselves useful."

There was a debate, of course. There always was. Wasn't it safer to remain in the caves until we knew for sure that Kyle wasn't captured? Should we move to the other cave system Jeb knew of?

Wanda didn't want to wait any longer for the raid. I didn't blame her. She was trying to protect the Seeker from the people here who might try to do her harm. She slept with that cryotank in her arms. She only let me hold it when she needed her hands for something. I saw the looks people were giving that tank and I didn't want Wanda in the middle of it, which, of course, she would be if a fight broke out. Luckily Jeb was able to keep everyone in order, but I didn't want to risk it. I voted against postponing the raid. Jeb was right, there was nothing we could do for Kyle here and we had other things to do.

So we went on the raid.

It was quick. We dropped the Seeker's tank off at the airport. Then we picked up two souls, or kidnapped them. They were Healers. Doc needed some extra help. Someone who knew about the soul medicines. That way Wanda wouldn't have to keep hurting herself to find out how to heal us.

The abduction was quick, too. But it bothered Wanda. She pretended to cry to get the souls to come help her, but by the time me and Jared got them in the back of the van, her tears weren't pretend anymore.

On the way back, Wanda did something that shocked me more than the last few days events combined. She asked if I could stop and get her some fast food. She just wanted a burger and some fries, but the fact that she asked was incredible. Wanda never asked for anything from anybody. It made me smile to know that she was beginning to be a little selfish. Not that it was selfish. Jared wanted some too and I ended up finishing her burger.

We made it home alright, and everyone was waiting for us. But Jared and I were busy trying to carry the Healers to the hospital. Soon we had them on the gurneys and Jared was showing me how to use one of the cryotanks.

The small tank was remarkably cold. Definitely colder than any freezer or cooler I'd ever been around.

Doc stood next to the female Healer, waiting for Wanda's instructions. She hadn't shown him how to actually do the procedure himself.

"Wanda?" he asked.

Wanda took a breath. "Do you swear, Doc? _All_ of my terms? Do you promise me on your own life?"

"I do. I will meet all of your terms, Wanda," he answered. "I swear it."

"Jared?"

"Yes. Absolutely no killing, ever."

Then she turned to me. "Ian?"

"I'll protect them with my own life, Wanda," I assured her. She knew I would protect them the same way I'd protect her.

She turned to Jeb. "Jeb?"

"It's my house. Anyone who can't abide by this agreement will have to get out."

Wanda nodded. She had tears in her eyes, hopefully the happy kind. "Okay, then. Let's get it over with."

She took Doc through the extraction process step by step. I couldn't see what they were doing, but it sounded easy enough.

Wanda's hand reached out toward me. "Give me your hand," she said.

I took her hand in mine and she flipped it over so my palm was facing upwards.

"Give the soul to Ian—gently, please," Wanda told Doc.

Doc gently handed me the soul. At first, it was strange. I loved Wanda, but actually holding a soul...

That only lasted a second, though, because the moment I saw the sparkling silver creature in my palm I couldn't think of it as anything but beautiful. It looked like silver ribbons. It shone in the light the same way Wanda's eyes did. Wanda looked like this.

"It's pretty," I whispered.

"I think so, too," Wanda said. "Let it slide into your tank."

I looked the soul over for a second longer and then slid it into the cryotank. Jared showed me how to close the top.

Just then Jeb shouted, "Look out!" He pointed his rifle behind us.

The male healer had woken up and was staring at us from his cot.

"Chloroform," Jared yelled, tackling the soul back down to the cot.

The Healer looked directly at Wanda. I assumed it was because her eyes were reflecting the lantern light the same way his were, and she was obviously helping us.

"Why?" he asked. And then he fell back to the cot, blood flowing from his nose.

"_No_!" Wanda screamed, running to him. "No."

But it was to late. The Healer was already dead.


	22. New Development

**The Host belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Okay, wow. Its been a while. Sorry about that. This is a crazy time of year with work and I just haven't been able to write. I want you guys to know I have not given up on this story and I will finish. Hopefully soon. Now I'm going to disappoint you. I won't be uploading anything until after November. I'm going to be doing NaNoWriMo this year and I'll be focusing all of my writing time on that. Hope you guys understand. I am going to try to have the rest of this story finished and uploaded by the end of December though. Hopefully this will tide you over until then. Let me know if I made any huge mistakes in this chapter. I was rushing while I was editing.**

**Blurring the Lines**

_Chapter 22_

Wanda was spending most of her time with the Healer. She desperately wanted the woman to wake up the way Lacey had. I think that might have eased her guilt about the souls taking over, to know that we could possibly reclaim some of what had been lost. It had been a few days since Kyle ran off. I was worried about him. He was an idiot, but he was my brother.

I couldn't imagine what my life would be like without Kyle. I didn't want to find out. He'd be back anyway, so I didn't have to worry. Even if he came back with an army of Seeker's tailing him, he'd be back.

I was wrong, about the Seeker part anyway. Kyle surprised us all. He didn't get himself caught. And he managed to find Jodi and bring her back.

We were all pissed at him. Everyone in the caves gathered around him in the main cave, yelling and questioning him. Jodi, or rather, the soul who was inhabiting Jodi's body, was cowering behind him.

Jared was yelling and I was standing next to him glowering at my brother. Jared continued to demand to know what Kyle had been thinking, but Kyle didn't answer.

Instead he said, "Just calm down, okay? Back off, Jared, you're scaring her!"

Jodi—the girl did look scared, but I wasn't paying much attention to her at that point. I was angry with him for running off, even if I could understand why he did it. Jared's face was beat red and it looked as if he might explode in rage at any second. Jamie was standing next to him, looking a little lost. I don't think the kid fully understood the ramifications of what Kyle did. The crowd behind us continued to shout out questions at Kyle. Someone even asked why he'd bothered to come back at all.

Then Kyle's eyes flashed as he spotted something off in the crowd. "Wanda?" he said. " There you are! Could you please come and give me a little help here?"

Jeb immediately emerged from the crowd after that. He cleared a path so that Wanda could make her way up to Kyle. I thought she had been with Doc in the hospital, but it looked like she was coming from the kitchen.

"That's enough," Jeb growled when a few people refused to back off. "You'll get a chance to dress 'im down later. We all will. Let's get this sorted out first, okay? Let me through."

Jeb pushed past me and Jared last. Wanda patted my arm as she walked by and I took a breath, knowing I should calm down.

"Okay, Kyle," Jeb said, wielding his rifle in both hands. "Don't try to excuse yourself, 'cause there ain't no excuse. I'm plain torn between kickin' ya out and shootin' ya now."

The girl behind Kyle gasped a little at Jeb's remark and I realized for the first time what she must be feeling. Jeb must have been thinking the dame thing because he said, "But right now, let's calm everybody down."

When Jeb turned around it became obvious by the way he held his gun that our little mob needed to break up. Now. "Kyle's got a guest, and you're scarin' the snot out of her, people. I think you can all dig up some better manners than that. Now, all of you clear out and get to work on something useful. My cantaloupes are dying. Somebody do something about that, hear?"

Soon everyone had gone, aside from Jared, Jamie and myself. Jeb looked at us a moment and then opened his mouth to tell us to scram, but before he could form the words I'd already grabbed a hold of Wanda's hand. If she was staying so was I. By the way Jeb rolled his eyes, I figured Jared and Jamie had probably followed my lead.

"Thanks, Jeb," Kyle sighed.

"Shut the hell up, Kyle. Just keep your fat mouth shut. I'm dead serious about shooting you, you worthless maggot."

The girl behind Kyle made A small, frightened sound.

"Okay, Jeb. But could you save the death threats till we're alone? She's terrified enough. You remember how that kind of stuff freaks Wanda out." Kyle turned and smiled at Wanda and I almost wanted to laugh at her expression. She looked shocked, like she'd just witnessed some sort of miracle. I suppose maybe she did. Then he looked back down at the girl standing beside him. "See, Sunny? This is Wanda, the one I told you about. She'll help us—she won't let anyone hurt you, just like me."

He was looking at her with such compassion in his eyes as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close to him. The scene was so familiar and yet so strange. I'd seen this exact gesture from these exact people so many times before. But that was years ago, and that was Jodi, and that was a different Kyle. If never seen this girl before in my life, yet Kyle was being so... so kind to her.

"Kyle's right," Wanda told the frightened girl. "I won't let anyone hurt you. Your name is Sunny?"

Sunny looked up at Kyle with big eyes.

"It's okay," he told her. "You don't have to be afraid of Wanda. She's just like you." He looked down at Wanda. "Her real name is longer—something about ice."

"Sunlight passing through the ice," the girl whispered. Her voice was so familiar, and I winced slightly at the sound of it. Kyle wasn't the only one who lost Jodi. She was like a sister to me.

"She doesn't mind being called just Sunny, though. She said it was fine," Kyle said.

"I was a Bear, too, Sunny," Wanda told the girl. "They called me Lives in the Stars, then. Wanderer, here."

The girl's eyes grew impossibly wide at the name. "Lives in the Stars," she repeated. "Rides the Beast."

"You lived in the second crystal city, I guess," Wanda said. Surprisingly, she didn't sound happy, although I had no idea why.

"Yes," the girl said. "I heard the story so many times…"

But Wanda interrupted her before she could explain what story she was talking about. "Did you like being a Bear, Sunny? Were you happy there?"

The girl looked up at Kyle and began crying. Wanda, who looked confused, glanced up at Kyle. "I'm sorry," she said.

Kyle patted Sunny's arm gently. "Don't be afraid. You won't be hurt. I promised."

"But I like it here. I want to stay," she whispered so quietly I could barely make it out.

Jeb ushered us toward the hospital. I guess he thought it was best if we handled this new development right away. Sunny very clearly didn't want to leave earth, she seemed to want to stay with Kyle. She wasn't afraid of him, and he wasn't really giving her a reason to be. My brother was actually being quite compassionate toward the soul. I probably shouldn't have been surprised. It was Jodi's body we were talking about.

Wanda explained how the healer's body had finally woken up. When we reached the hospital Wanda introduced us one by one, Trying not to frighten the women. She was still afraid of humans and she couldn't remember who she was just yet. I didn't blame her for being scared.

Wanda took Sunny over to the corner of the room to ask her which planet she'd like to go to. I didn't think Sunny was going to very happy no matter where we chose to send her. Jared and I hung back, watching Doc calming the healer. He kept trying to get her to answer little questions about her life before the souls showed up. It didn't seem to be going very well.

That's when Sunny started crying. "It's not fair! Why do you get to stay? Why can't I stay, if you can?"

We all turned toward the little group in the corner. I was the only one who started to walk over toward them. That was a tough question to answer. How could Sunny ever understand how much we needed Wanda? How much we depended on her?

But apparently the question wasn't as hard as I thought.

"That wouldn't be fair, would it?" Wanda said. "But I don't get to stay, Sunny. I have to go, too." I stopped dead in my tracks when I heard that. What was she saying? "I have to go, Sunny, just like you. I have to give my body back, too."

I felt all the blood drain from my face.

"What?" The word came out louder, colder than I meant it to.

I saw Kyle say my name rather than heard him say it. My heart was pounding too loudly for me to hear much of anything. "Wanda," I said through clenched teeth. I held my hand out for her. It was trembling, I wasn't sure why. Anger, frustration... fear?

I could tell by the look on Wanda's face she didn't mean for me to hear that little tidbit. What was she planning on doing, just letting Doc take her out and send her away without even saying anything to anyone? No goodbyes? Or did everyone else know? Kyle didn't seem surprised by the admission. Was I the only clueless one?

I grabbed Wanda by the arm and dragged her off the ground. Sunny, who was holding Wanda's arm, came up with her, so I shook her off.

"What is with you?" Kyle demanded of me. How could he ask me that? He had to know. No. He wouldn't know, would he. Kyle was always so wrapped up in his own life, his own problems to ever notice what I was going through. Here he was, he finally got Jodi back, he didn't care if Wanda was sent away. Why would he? He got what he wanted.

I lifer my foot up and before I knew what I was doing I slammed it, hard, right into Kyle's nose. Wanda cried my name. She hated violence, I knew, but right now I didn't care. "C'mon!" I growled, dragging her toward the door. Jared was standing there, blocking my way.

"Have you lost your mind, Ian?" he asked. "What are you doing to her?"

"Did you know about this?" I shouted.

"You're going to hurt her!" Ha. Like he cared about Wanda. He was just worried about Mel's body. And I wasn't hurting her.

"Do you know what she's planning?" I shouted at him. He didn't answer. His face closed off completely. He turned on the mask he always wore when he wanted to hide something. He knew. He knew and he wanted her to do it. He wanted Wanda gone, regardless of what it would mean for the rest of us. What it would mean for me.

I hit him. I hit him so hard my hand hurt. Jared lurched back into the hallway and I dragged Wanda out passed him.

"Ian stop," Wanda cried.

" You stop!" I yelled back.

"O'Shea!" Jared called after us.

" I'm going to hurt her?" I screamed back, pulling Wanda further down the tunnel. " I am? You hypocritical swine! "

He was the one who wanted to hurt her. He didn't want her here! I did! I loved her. I needed her here. She wasn't going anywhere. That was when I heard Wanda whimper. I was hurting her. I suddenly realized I was holding onto her arm too tight. I was dragging her, she could barely keep up.

I stopped and turned to look at her, but it was too dark to see her features.

"Ian, Ian, I…" she stuttered. Then she went quiet again. I picked her up and held her to my chest. Cradling her, keeping her safe. I needed to talk to her now, but not here. I needed to see her face. I ran toward my room. I ran through the garden, passed people who just stared wide-eyed as I flew by with Wanda in my arms. I didn't care. When I got to my room I kicked open the red door and dropped Wanda onto my mattress.

I was breathing heavily, from running all the way here with Wanda in my arms and from the rage I felt swirling inside my chest. I spun and put the door back in place before turning on Wanda again. She rolled up onto her knees, looking miserable. She held out her hands like she didn't know what to say to me. Well I knew what to say.

"You. Are. Not. Leaving. Me."

"Ian," she whispered. "You have to see that… that I can't stay. You must see that."

"No!" I shouted at her, then fell to my knees in front of her. I didn't have the will to stand anymore. I buried my face in her stomach and cried. I don't think I have ever cried like that before. I just couldn't take it. How could she leave me? Why? Why did everyone leave me?

"No, Ian, no," she begged. This was so much worse than his anger. "Don't, please. Please, don't."

I moaned her name and, even through my shaking sobs, I could feel her start to shake too. She was crying too.

"Ian, please. Don't feel this way. Don't. I'm so sorry. Please."

"You can't leave," I begged.

"I have to, I have to," she sobbed.

We cried together for a while. When I was able to pull myself together I wrapped my arms around her and waited for her to finish crying. I stroked her back until she was finally able to speak again.

"Sorry," I whispered. "I was mean."

"No, no. I'm sorry. I should have told you, when you didn't guess. I just… I couldn't. I didn't want to tell you—to hurt you—to hurt me. It was selfish."

"We need to talk about this, Wanda. It's not a done deal. It can't be."

"It is," she said.

I shook my head. My jaw was clenched so tight it hurt. "How long? How long have you been planning this?"

"Since the Seeker," she told me.

I nodded. That made sense. "And you thought that you had to give up your secret to save her. I can understand that. But that doesn't mean you have to go anywhere. Just because Doc knows now… that doesn't mean anything. If I'd thought for one minute that it did, that one action equaled the other, I wouldn't have stood there and let you show him. No one is going to force you to lie down on his blasted gurney! I'll break his hands if he tries to touch you!"

"Ian, please." She was trying to calm me down. But she had to understand.

"They can't make you, Wanda!" I shouted. "Do you hear me?"

"No one is making me. I didn't show Doc how to do the separation so that I could save the Seeker," she whispered. "The Seeker's being here just made me have to decide… faster. I did it to save Mel, Ian."

I took a deep breath but didn't speak. What was I supposed to say? Of course she did it for Melanie. I should have seen it coming.

"She's trapped in here, Ian," Wanda explained. "It's like a prison—worse than that; I can't even describe it. She's like a ghost. And I can free her. I can give her herself back."

"You deserve a life, too, Wanda," I said softly. "You deserve to stay."

"But I love her, Ian."

I closed my eyes. I could feel stinging behind the lids. I pressed my lips together tightly. "But I love you. Doesn't that matter?" I whispered.

"Of course it matters," Wanda said. "So much. Can't you see? That only makes it more... necessary."

Necessary? My love for her made it necessary for her to leave. She didn't want me to love her.

Ugh, I was such an idiot. I thought she... Had I only been bothering her this whole time? Wanda was too kind to tell me to leave her alone. She had probably made her decision about me and then felt guilty so she never told me.

"Is it so unbearable to have me love you? Is that it? I can keep my mouth shut, Wanda. I won't say it again. You can be with Jared, if that's what you want. Just stay."

It was all I wanted. For her to stay. Nothing else mattered. If she wanted Jared, that was fine. I could deal with that, with seeing them together. What I couldn't handle was Wanda not being here. Not existing. I couldn't never see her again. I couldn't never talk to her or hear her laugh or watch her get herself all worked up about something. How could I live without Wanda? Without her constantly worrying about everything.

Without her... without her... I couldn't imagine life without her. I felt like I had known her forever, instead of the short time it'd actually been. Less than a year.

Maybe this was what I deserved. I didn't deserve Wanda and I knew it. I had hurt her, I tried to kill her. I strangled her. She didn't want to be anywhere near me. I couldn't blame her for that. But I couldn't let her go. It was selfish, but I needed her. I needed her here, even if she never wanted to speak to me again. She had to stay.

"No, Ian!" Wanda cried. She put her hands on either side of my face. Her hands were so soft and warm against my skin, so gentle. I wanted to remember this, knowing I might never feel it again. "No. I—I love you, too. Me, the little silver worm in the back of her head. But my body doesn't love you. It can't love you. I can never love you in this body, Ian. It pulls me in two. It's unbearable."

My heart skipped a beat, and then started up faster than before.

Wanda loved me.

Wanda, herself, loved me.

I almost couldn't breath. I wanted to wrap my arms around her and pull her close. I wanted to kiss her more passionately than she's ever been kissed before. I wanted...

It didn't matter what I wanted, because I couldn't do any of it. Melanie was there. I could never be with Wanda, even though she did love me. She was right. Melanie was in love with Jared. Wanda's body was in love with Jared. Wanda's soul may love me, but everything else about her loved Jared.

I closed my eyes again. I could feel the tears leaking out. This was worse than her hate me. This was worse that her being in love with Jared. Wanda loved me, but we could never be together. And it was causing her pain.

The next thing I knew I felt Wanda's arms wrap around my neck. Her lips touched mine and I forgot about everything else. I pulled her close and kissed her. I didn't want to think about all the problems that came with our relationship. She was here and I wasn't letting her go. This was right, me and her. It felt so right. We would figure something out. I could feel it in the way she kissed me. This wasn't like any other kiss, we were connected.

I felt Wanda's tears on my cheek and moved to kiss them away. "Don't cry, Wanda. Don't cry. You're staying with me."

"Eight full lives," she whispered against my jaw. I could hear the emotion in her voice. "Eight full lives and I never found anyone I would stay on a planet for, anyone I would follow when they left. I never found a partner. Why now? Why you? You're not of my species. How can you be my partner?"

Partners. I liked that. Me and Wanda, forever. It was crazy, sure. We were both aliens to one another. She was a soul—a body snatcher—and I was a human—a violent, hostile barbarian. How was it that we could fall in love? Fate. Destiny. Whatever you want to call it, it brought Wanda and I together and I was thankful for that.

"It's a strange universe," I murmered.

"It's not fair," she cried.

I held her as she clung to me. At least I knew that Wanda did want to stay with me. That she loved me. But there was nothing I could say to make her feel better. It wasn't fair.

It wasn't fair that she had to choose. It wasn't fair that her host didn't fade away like she was supposed to. Even though I was thankful that Melanie had brought Wanda to me, was it fair what Wanda had been forced to go through because of it? All of the pain she suffered, the pain she's still suffering?

I knew Wanda better than I knew myself, and I knew she was struggling with this. She didn't want to hurt me, but she wanted to do what was right by Melanie. Only I wasn't going to let her. She couldn't leave me. I wasn't willing to let her go before when I thought she wanted Jared, I was definitely not letting her go anywhere now that I knew she loved me.

We'd figure this out. Between me, Jeb, Doc, Jared and Wanda, we could find a solution. I needed Wanda, but so did they. This community needed Wanda. She could do things, get things, go places, that no one else could. She was our hope for a better life. She made my life better.

"I love you," Wanda whispered.

"Don't say that like you're saying goodbye," I told her.

"I, the soul called Wanderer, love you, human Ian. And that will never change, no matter what I might become. If I were a Dolphin or a Bear or a Flower, it wouldn't matter. I would always love you, always remember you. You will be my only partner."

I tightened my grip on her. She couldn't say goodbye. I wasn't letting her go anywhere. Ever.

"You're not wandering off anywhere. You're staying here."

"Ian—" she protested, but I cut her off.

"This isn't just for me. You're a part of this community, and you aren't getting kicked out without discussion. You are far too important to us all—even to the ones who would never admit it. We need you."

"No one's kicking me out, Ian."

"No. Not even you yourself, Wanderer."

I kissed her again, rougher than before. One of my hands tangled in her hair. I pulled her head back a little so I could look her in the eyes. "Good or bad?" I demanded.

"Good," she breathed.

"That's what I thought," I said and kissed her again. When she started gasping for air I loosened my grip on her and let my lips slide to her ear. "Let's go."

"Where? Where are we going?" she asked, a little breathlessly.

"Don't give me any trouble about this, Wanderer. I'm half out of my mind, I said and pulled her to her feet.

"Where?" she asked again.

"You're going down the eastern tunnel, past the field, to the end," I said.

"The game room?"

"Yes. And then you are going to wait there until I get the rest of them."

"Why?"

"Because," I explained, "this will be discussed. I'm calling a tribunal, Wanderer, and you are going to abide by our decision."


	23. Choices

**Hey guys! I've been away forever, I know, but I've finally finished writing this story, even though it took me longer than I'd originally planned. I will upload one chapter a day until all three chapters are up. (I think it'll only be three. I still have to finish editing them.) I hope you guys are still reading and hope you enjoy this chapter. This was one of those chapters that is almost all dialogue from the book, but it couldn't be avoided. Anyway, enjoy :)**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 23_

Less than an hour later I was sitting across from Wanda in the game room. The white-blue glow of the lantern lit her face in such a way that I could tell just how exhausted she really was. I wanted to make this as quick and painless for her as possible.

I had only summoned a few others for this tribunal. Just Jeb, Jared and Doc. They were the only ones who's opinions mattered, at least when it came to Wanda. Well, there was Jamie, but he was too young to deal with this sort of thing and I knew Wanda would want to keep him out of this.

I wasn't the only one she had kept this secret from. I think she just couldn't deal with the look on Jamie's face when she told him she wanted to leave. The kid would be devastated. Even if he got his sister back, he loved Wanda like a sister too. He would wan to keep them both, not choose one over the other.

And really, I didn't want to choose either. If there was a way for Wanda to give Melanie her body back I'd be all for it, but not at the cost of losing her. I knew this was hard for Wanda to accept but we needed her. We wanted her here. I wanted her here.

Wanda sat, murmuring to Doc, a few feet away from me. She was asking about the Healer and Sunny.

When I had gone back to the hospital Doc and Jared had already taken Sunny out of Jodi's body. Jodi hadn't woken up. Not yet, at least. Kyle was watching her. Just sitting there staring at her. He wouldn't leave her side until she woke up, I knew that. Probably not even then, either.

I smiled a little to myself. There was a good chance that, if Jodi did wake up like the Healer and Lacey, she'd never be alone again.

Doc took a deep breath and let it out in a huff. "I don't want to be away from Jodi long. She might need something."

"Right," Wanda agreed. "Let's get this over with."

"Okay," Jeb said. "Wanda, what's your side?"

I looked at Wanda as she said, "I'm giving Melanie back." That was it. Just, "I'm giving Melanie back." She was being direct. Knowing that it was something no one could really argue with. At least not Jared and Jeb. How could they?

Jeb turned to me. "Ian, what's yours?"

"We need Wanda here."

Precise and to the point. They couldn't really argue against that either—although I was sure Jared would try.

Jeb nodded. "That's a tricky one. Wanda, why should I agree with you?"

"If it were you, you'd want your body back," Wanda stated. "You can't deny Melanie that."

Jeb turned back to me. "Ian?"

"We have to look at the greater good, Jeb. Wanda's already brought us more health and security than we've ever had. She's vital to the survival of our community—of the entire human race. One person can't stand in the way of that."

A good argument and Jeb knew it. Of course, that was the moment when Jared decided to butt in.

"Wanda, what does Mel say?"

Wanda looked into Jared's eyes for a moment and I felt a hint of jealousy pass through me. I knew it was stupid after everything we'd just said to one another, but it was still there.

"Melanie wants her body back," she said. "She wants her life back."

I witnessed the strangest thing then. The far off look that Wanda got when she was having an internal conversation with Melanie took over her expression. For an instant Wanda wasn't there with us, she was in her head with Mel. And fighting.

And I knew that as much a right as Melanie had to want her body back she still knew how much Wanda was needed here.

"Liar," I said. "I can see you arguing with her. I'll bet she agrees with me. She's a good person. She knows how much we need you."

"Mel knows everything I know. She'll be able to help you. And the Healer's host. She knows more than I ever did. You'll be fine. You were fine before I was here. You'll survive, just like before."

I won't. I didn't say it, but it was as true and as relevant as any other argument.

Jeb huffed, sounding unsure. "I don't know, Wanda. Ian's got a point."

Jared leveled a glare at Jeb. I figured it was only a matter of time before he blew a gasket and demanded Wanda be taken out of Melanie. I mean, I knew he cared about Wanda and wouldn't want to hurt her, but if he thought this was something Mel and Wanda wanted... Well, he wouldn't back down.

"Jeb," Jared said. "There's only one decision here. You know that."

Jeb looked at him, eyebrows raised. "Is there, kid? Seems to me there's a whole barrel of 'em."

"That's Melanie's body!"

"And Wanda's, too."

Jared choked on his own words and had to start over. "You can't leave Mel trapped in there—it's like murder, Jeb."

Murder!

I leaned forward, toward Jared. "And what is it that you're doing to Wanda, Jared? And the rest of us, if you take her away?"

"You don't care about the rest of anybody! You just want to keep Wanda at Melanie's expense—nothing else matters to you."

"And you want to have Melanie at Wanda's expense—nothing else matters to you!" I yelled. "So, with those things being equal, it comes down to what's best for everyone else."

"No! It comes down to what Melanie wants! That's her body!"

I was leaning forward, ready. Jared seemed to be ready for a fight as well. I could feel how tightly my fists were clenched, it was almost painful, but it didn't matter. If Jared wanted to fight, so be it. But we were settling this now, once and for all.

"Cool it, boys! Cool it right now," Jeb ordered. "This is a tribunal, and we're going to stay calm and keep our heads. We've got to think about every side."

"Jeb —" Jared started.

"Shut up." Jeb chewed on his lip while he deliberated. "Okay, here's how I see it. Wanda's right —"

I leaped to my feet. How could he agree with them?

"Hold it! Sit yourself back down. Let me finish."

Slowly, very slowly and with gritted teeth, I lowered myself back down to the dirt floor.

"Wanda is right," Jeb continued. "Mel needs her body back. But, " he added quickly when I tensed up again, "but I don't agree with the rest, Wanda. I think we need you pretty bad, kid. We got Seekers out there lookin' for us, and you can talk right to 'em. The rest of us can't do that. You save lives. I got to think about the welfare of my household."

Jared spoke through his teeth. "So we get her another body. Obviously."

And there it was. The solution to the problem. Another body. How simple and strangely complicated all at the same time.

What would that be like? I fell in love with Wanda in Melanie's body. Would it be different? Would it matter to me if she looked different? I didn't think so. No, I was certain—

"No! _No!_" Wanda shook her head frantically.

"Why not, Wanda?" Jeb asked. "Don't sound like a half-bad idea to me."

Wanda swallowed and sucked in a deep breath before answering. "Jeb. Listen to me carefully, Jeb. I am tired of being a parasite. Can you understand that? Do you think I want to go into another body and have this start all over again? Do I have to feel guilty forever for taking someone's life away from them? Do I have to have someone else hate me? I'm barely a soul anymore—I love you brutish humans too much. It's wrong for me to be here, and I hate feeling that."

She took another breath, but it didn't do anything to stop the tears that were running down her face. "And what if things change? What if you put me in some-one else, steal another life, and it goes wrong? What if that body pulls me after some other love, back to the souls? What if you can't trust me anymore? What if I betray you next time? I don't want to hurt you!"

By the time she finished she was sobbing. I slid closer and wrapped my arms around her shoulders. "It's okay, honey. You don't have to be anyone else. Nothing's going to change."

"Hold on, Wanda," Jeb said. "How does going to one of those other planets help you? You'll still be a parasite, kid."

I flinched at the word parasite. Wanda did, too.

"It's different on other planets, Jeb," Wanda explained. "There isn't any resistance. And the hosts themselves are different. They aren't as individualized as humans, their emotions are so much milder. It doesn't feel like stealing a life. Not like it feels here. No one will hate me. And I'd be too far away to hurt you. You'd be safer…"

Jeb sighed. "This is… a pickle."

"Jeb —" Jared and I both started, then we both glared at each other. Jeb needed to make a decision soon or else Jared was going to get the crap kicked out of him before the night was through.

"Jeb," Wanda said softly. We all turned to look at her. She sounded tired. Weary. "You don't have to decide right now. Doc needs to check on Jodi, and I'd like to see her, too. Plus, I haven't eaten all day. Why don't you sleep on it? We can talk again tomorrow. We've got plenty of time to think about this."

"That's a good idea, Wanda. I think everyone here could use a breather," Jeb said. "Go get some food, and we'll all sleep on it."

"I'll be along to help with Jodi after I eat, Doc," Wanda said. "See you later."

"Okay." Doc sounded tense, but I figured with everything going on, who wouldn't be. And now he had to go back to the hospital and deal with the Healer and Jodi, not to mention Kyle. He was under a lot of stress.

I looked over at Wanda. "Hungry?" I asked.

She nodded so I helped her up and led her to the kitchen. She stopped when we got to the fields though.

"Ian, can we eat here?" she asked, gesturing to the wheat that had just begun to sprout.

I raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

Wanda pressed her lips together. "I don't want to run into Jamie right now. If he found out about... It would be so hard for him. It would tear him in two. I don't want him to know."

"It's okay. I'll go get us something to eat and be right back."

We ate dinner in silence, just the two of us and the wheat sprouts. It was nice, peaceful. After we were finished Wanda wanted to stop by the hospital to see Jodi.

When we got there Doc and Kyle were standing over Jodi's cot. Doc was taking her pulse and Kyle was just staring. He was holding what I guessed was Sunny's cryotank in one arm.

Wanda spoke to him for a minute before he asked, "Is there something I'm supposed to be doing here? Is there some way to help?"

"Talk to her," Wanda said, "say her name, talk about things she'll remember. Talk about Sunny, even. That helped with the Healer's host."

"Mandy," Doc corrected. "She says it's not exactly right, but it's close."

Wanda repeated the name. "Where is she?" she asked.

"With Trudy—that was a good call there. Trudy's exactly the right person. I think she's gotten her to sleep."

"That's good. Mandy will be okay."

"I hope so." Doc said. "I've got lots of questions for her."

Wanda stepped closer to Jodi and reached out to touch her arm. "Like this, Kyle," she said, brushing her arm again. "Jodi? Jodi, can you hear me? Kyle's waiting for you, Jodi. He got himself in a lot of trouble getting you here—everybody who knows him wants to beat him senseless."

Wanda grinned up at Kyle and I saw the corners of Kyle's mouth twitch up. I smiled.

"Not that you're surprised to hear that," I said, joking with the unconscious girl. "When hasn't that been the case, eh, Jodi? It's good to see you again, sweetheart. Though I wonder if you feel the same way. Must have been a nice break to get rid of this idiot for so long."

"You remember Ian, of course," Kyle said, acknowledging me for the first time since I entered the room. "Never has managed to catch up to me in anything, but he keeps trying. Hey, Ian," he added, keeping his eyes on Jodi, "you got anything you want to say to me?"

"Not really."

"I'm waiting for an apology."

"Keep waiting," I said.

"Can you believe he kicked me in the face, Jodes?" Kyle said. "For no reason at all."

I smiled. "Who needs an excuse, eh, Jodi?"

"Keep it up, Kyle," Wanda murmured gently. "That's just right. She'll come around."

I watched Kyle watch the love of his life lying there on a cot, hoping she'd wake up and come back to him. I didn't want to imagine how he was feeling. If Jeb didn't come up with a solution I might get to experience it first hand, except my girl wants to shuttle herself off to some planet that might as well be a million light years away.

But she wasn't gone yet, and she wouldn't ever be if I had any say in it. I'd leave the caves with her if I had to, but I wasn't going to let her leave just because she felt some twisted obligation to Jared and Jamie.

"Wanda?" Kyle said after a minute.

"Yes?" she asked.

"I'm sorry."

I felt my eyebrows raise and had to suppress a snort when Wanda said, "Um… why?"

"For trying to kill you," Kyle said casually, like he was talking about the weather. "Guess I _was_ wrong."

"Please tell me you have some kind of recording device available, Doc," I gasped.

"Nope. Sorry, Ian."

I shook my head. "This moment should be preserved. I never thought I'd live to see the day that Kyle O'Shea would admit to being wrong. C'mon, Jodi. That ought to _shock_ you awake."

"Jodi, baby," Kyle laughed, "don't you want to defend me? Tell Ian I never _have_ been wrong before."

Wanda took a step back and stretched. "I'm tired, Ian," she said.

"I'll bet you are. Did you stay up with the Heal—with Mandy all night?" I asked.

"Yeah." She yawned.

"Have a nice night, Doc," I said, pulling her with me toward the exit. "Good luck, Kyle. We'll be back in the morning."

"Night, Kyle," Wanda murmured. "See you, Doc."

We didn't talk as we walked back through the south tunnel. I still held her hand. It felt warm and fragile in mine, and I squeezed it just enough that she would feel the pressure. I just wanted her to know that I was here for her. No matter what sort of consensus we came to tomorrow I wasn't letting her go, and I wouldn't let anyone hurt her.

When we got to my room I paused, raising my eyebrows. Did she want to stay here with me tonight? She was avoiding Jamie and Kyle wouldn't be leaving the hospital until Jodi woke up. It was perfect.

Wanda went directly to the bed on the right. Her bed, but I didn't hesitate to crawl in with her and pull her close to me. She was shaking like a leaf.

"It's going to be fine, Wanda," I promised. "I know we'll find a solution."

"I truly love you, Ian," she whispered. "With my whole soul, I love you."

I smiled, loving the way those words sounded coming from her. "I truly love you, too, my Wanderer."

Then I kissed her, slowly and passionately, distracting her, until she stopped shaking.

"Sleep, Wanda. Save it for tomorrow," I whispered. "It will keep for the night."

She nodded against me and sighed. There was no better way to fall asleep than with Wanda in my arms, I was certain.


	24. Alone

**Stephenie Meyer owns The Host.**

**Hey guys. This is the extra chapter from the paperback edition. Hope you all enjoy it!**

**And I think I'm going to have a bit of a contest since this story is finally coming to an end. I was thinking 500th reviewer gets to pick any character from The Host and I'll write a scene (of their choice) from that character's POV. Sound good? Have any scenes you'd love to see from someone else's perspective? Let me know if that's a good idea. And review! You guys are great and we'll definitely break 500 reviews by the final chapter.**

**Blurring The Lines**

_Chapter 24_

The sun was shining brightly through the cracks in the ceiling by the time I woke up. I rolled over onto my back and squinted my eyes against the light. I turned to my right and realized Wanda was missing.

I stretched then rubbed a hand down my face, wiping the sleep away. My stomach growled as I got to my feet. I decided to check the kitchen for Wanda. She was probably down there helping with breakfast.

But when I got there only Lucina was serving eggs. Wanda wasn't anywhere. I asked if anyone had seen her. They hadn't. I figured maybe she'd gone down to Doc's to check on things. Maybe Jodi was awake by now.

When I got to the entrance to the south tunnel someone came out of the dark and crashed right into me. I reached out to steady her, and when I realized who it was I smiled.

Wanda. Just who I was looking for.

But something unexpected happened when my fingers touched her arm. Or more like nothing happened. Nothing at all. No sparks, no tingles. Nothing. It was just...

Melanie.

It was Melanie, not Wanda, standing in front of me. I pulled my hands back from her quickly.

And then things started to click. She'd gotten up early, maybe never even went to sleep, and snuck down to the hospital.

So she really did it then. She went through with it. Regardless of anyone else's opinions. She had herself taken out of Melanie and now Melanie was standing with me instead of Wanda.

It was the most _selfish_ unselfish thing anyone's ever done. Or maybe that was just me being selfish. Did it matter? She left. She didn't care that I wanted her to stay. She was gone. This girl in front of me... this person I loved, it wasn't her.

I started at Melanie and she stared back. Then she was talking and her voice sounded the same, but it wasn't.

"She's fine," she said. "She's in a tank. We'll get her a body. She'll be fine. Fine. She's fine."

Slowly it all got through and I could understand.

Fine. She's fine. Wanda's okay. They didn't send her away yet. Or, they're not planning to. She—Melanie—said they'd get her body. So, was this the plan? What they came up with? Did Wanda agree to this last night after I went to sleep? And she, what? Just forgot to let me know?

She didn't want me to know?

I watched... Melanie start to reach out to me—probably a left over reaction from Wanda, because Melanie hated me—and I started to reach for her too. I wanted to reach out to her.

Not her. Wanda. I wanted her to still be Wanda.

I shouldn't want that as much as I did. Wanda wanted Melanie to have her body back, so I should too. But how could I want that when all I could think about was how much unwanted to be speaking to Wanda right now?

I missed her so much already I could barely breath.

"Do you want to... go to her?" Melanie asked.

I looked, really looked, at Melanie for the first time. I recognized the pain in her eyes. It was the same as mine. But there was also... sympathy? She felt bad for me, I realized. She was trying to be nice.

I don't know why I started to reach for her again. To thank her, maybe, but I dropped my hand.

"She's with Doc," she said, turning back toward the hospital.

She was walking sideways, making sure I was following. And after a moment I did follow after her, my steps jerky and stiff. And after a few more moments, I started walking faster to the point where she was hurrying to keep up.

All I could think about was Wanda. It felt like she was with me, walking right beside me. I had to remind myself it was Melanie, and every time I did I had to swallow back the emotions trying to escape.

"I couldn't stop her," Melanie said after a while.

I wasn't expecting her to talk to me and I definitely wasn't expecting her to say something like that. I hesitated, then asked roughly, "Did you want to?"

I couldn't imagine she'd want to give up her body for Wanda, no matter how close they'd become. No matter how much she cared about her. Wanda loved Melanie enough for that, but did Melanie feel the same?

"Yes," she said.

We slowed down a little. She sounded so much like Wanda. And not just her voice. If the situation was reversed, Wanda would say the same thing. Wanda _did_ the same thing. She gave up her body, her life, for Melanie. And Melanie wanted to do the same for her.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because she... is my best friend," Melanie said.

I nodded, but I knew she couldn't see me. "I wondered about that."

She didn't say anything so I explained. "I wondered if anyone who really knew her could not love her. You knew her every thought."

"Yes," she said, answering my unasked question. "I love her."

I hesitated briefly. "But you must have wanted your body back?" I said.

She didn't hesitate at all. "Not if it meant losing Wanda."

That was when I knew Melanie loved Wanda as much as I did. She would protect her the same way I would.

Protect her.

My feet were moving faster before I had even realized the direction my thoughts were going.

"She's not leaving this planet," I growled. Then I felt bad about it, because Melanie had already said we would get her a body.

"That was never her intention," Melanie said.

I slowed down a little. What did that mean?

"She was making that part up," Melanie explained, "so you all wouldn't argue with her. She wanted to stay here... She planned to, well, be buried here. With Walter and Wes."

I was so confused that I didn't realize right away that I'd stopped walking. She wanted to be buried? Not be sent away? She wanted to... die instead?

Melanie tried to explain quickly. "But she's fine, like I said. Doc put her in a tank. We'll get her a body. Soon. First thing."

But my head was spinning so fast I could barely hear her. "How could she think of doing that to me?" I hissed.

I'd never been as furious with Wanda as I was at that moment. She was supposed to be the unselfish one, but there was _nothing_ more selfish that what she'd done. She'd tried to kill herself!

"No," Melanie said softly, defending her friend. "It wasn't like that. She felt like she would be hurting you more is she'd stayed here... in this body."

"That's ridiculous," I spit. "How could she want to _die_ rather than leave?"

Didn't she know, or care, how much that would hurt me? Wanda leaving would hurt, yes. But if it was what she wanted, I could have dealt with that. But not her dying because she thought she'd be making everything right. How could Wanda killing herself make _anything_ right?

"She loves it here. She doesn't want to live anywhere else," Melanie said.

So she'd just give up? Because things were hard? "I never thought of her as such a quitter," I said.

"She's not," Melanie snapped. The same way I would have if someone said something bad about Wanda. But when she spoke again she was calmer, choosing her words carefully. "Wanda... She thinks she's tired of being a parasite, but I think she's just plain _tired_. She was so worn out, Ian. More than she let anyone see. Losing Wes like that... It was a lot for her. She blamed herself—"

I shook my head. "But she didn't have anything to do with—"

"Try telling her that!" Melanie shouted. She took a deep breath and then went on. "Then having to face the Seeker. It was tougher than you know. But more than any of that, loving you while... loving Jared. Loving Jamie and thinking he needed me more. Loving me. Feeling like she was hurting us all just by breathing. I don't think you can understand what that was like for her, because you're human. You can't imagine how she... she..." Her voice trailed off.

But I did. I could imagine exactly how she felt, what she was thinking. I just hadn't thought of it that way. I knew it was tough for her. I knew it bothered her, but I never thought it was too much for her to handle.

"I think I know what you mean," I told Melanie softly.

"So she really needed a break, but she got all—all _melodramatic_ about it. And I thought I couldn't save her." Her voice broke then and she had to take a breath before continuing. "I didn't know Jared was following us."

Jared. I sighed. "Jared caught on, but I missed it."

"Jared's just overly cautious," Melanie said. "Always. He goes overboard. Way, way overboard."

Which is true, I know. "But he was right," I said.

"Yes." She huffed and it was a sound of relief. "Paranoia comes in handy sometimes."

I'd have to thank Jared. But I couldn't help but think that I should have been paying better attention. If Jared hadn't caught on... If he hadn't cared... I would pay better attention in the future. I'd have to.

The future. What would that be like? What would happen once Wanda was in a new body? She hadn't planned on waking up again. Would she mind?

"Do you think she'll be angry with us when she wakes up?" I asked Melanie.

She snorted, amused. "Wanda, angry? Please."

"Unhappy, then?"

"She'll be fine," she told me.

She was right. Everyone Wanda loved was here, of course she would be alright. But would everything be the same? She would be in a different body, that would change things between us. There wouldn't be anything standing in our way. Would Wanda want that kind of relationship with me? Even Melanie said Wanda loved me, but...

"What you said before, about her loving you, and Jamie, and Jared... and me," I started.

"Yes?"

"Do you think she really does love me, or was she just responding to the fact that I love her? Wanting to make me happy?"

It would be just like Wanda to do something like that. And she'd never tell me herself. I needed to find out now while I had the chance. And who better to tell me what Wanda really thought of me than Mel?

When Melanie didn't respond right away I felt my heart sink.

"I'm only asking because I don't want to be a... a burden when she wakes up," I said. She still didn't respond and I closed my eyes tightly against the stinging sensation developing there. "Don't worry about hurting my feelings. I want the truth."

"It's not your feelings I'm worried about," she explained. "I'm just trying to think of the right way to describe it. I've been... not entirely human for the past year, so I get it, but I'm not sure you do."

"Try me," I said, feeling hope creep back into my chest.

"It's strong, Ian. The way she feels about you is something else. She loves this world, but so much of the reason she couldn't leave was really _you_. She thinks of you as her anchor. You gave her a reason to finally stay in one place after a lifetime of wandering."

My heart was pounding in my chest by the time she finished. I took a deep breath and felt complete in a way I'd never felt before.

It was settled, once and for all. I'd be with Wanda. She'd stay here with all of us and everything would be alright. Melanie and Jared would be together. There would be no more jealousy or animosity. Wanda wouldn't be torn in two anymore.

"Then that's all right," I said quietly.

"Yes," Melanie said.

We were almost to Doc's. I could see Melanie's face now in the dim light coming from up ahead. Almost to Wanda. They would get her a body soon and then we'd be together. I just hoped they'd get a body she would like. One that wouldn't have anyone still inside. A body she could be peaceful in.

"Don't rush," I told Melanie.

"What?" she asked.

"When you go to find her a body. Take your time. Make sure you find one she'll be happy in. I can wait."

The last thing I wanted was for Melanie and Jared to pick up the first Soul they could find because they thought I was miserable. This wasn't about me.

Melanie looked up at me. "Won't you be coming with us?" she asked, confused.

I shook my head as we entered the hospital. "I don't really care about that part. You know what she needs. And I'd rather be here with her."

I looked up and saw Jared leaning against a cot. Next to him was an occupied cryotank.

Wanda.

I walked right over to her and Jared took a step out of my way. I gently lifted her tank into my arms and sighed. I didn't realize until that moment just how anxious I'd been to get here. To see her. To hold her in my hands.

"Thanks," I said to Jared, but I kept my eyes on Wanda. I was pretty sure I'd never let her out of my sight again.

"I owe her," Jared said. Then, as if to emphasize his point, Melanie walked over and put an arm around him, but her free hand reached out to touch the cryotank I held.

Surprisingly, there was no jealousy at seeing Jared and Melanie together. I had who I wanted, and soon enough I'd be able to hold her for real.

We stayed that way for a few minutes. Then I noticed Doc's snoring coming from a cot in the corner and looked up for the first time. Kyle was looking back at me.

He looked miserable. His gaze lowered back down to Jodi's lifeless body, still in the same place on the cot it had been when Wanda and I left last night.

It was just a few hours ago, but it felt like days since I'd been here. Since I'd seen Wanda. Kyle still held Sunny's cryotank, in one hand, Jodi's hand in the other.

I walked over to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. It was all I could do. I was aware of Melanie and Jared watching us, sympathetic looks on their faces. It was all any of us could do.

I stayed there with Kyle for a long time after Jared and Melanie had left. Both of us holding a cold metal container in our arms, an unconscious girl between us.

For the first time in a long time I felt like Kyle and I had something in common. We were both waiting for the girl we loved to wake up. The difference was, every hour that passed, it became less and less likely that Jodi would wake up.

Melanie and Jared went out on a raid to get Wanda a body—somehow Jamie even weaseled his way in on that one. Days passed. Doc eventually had to tell Kyle that it wasn't likely Jodi would come back. At least not soon enough to keep her body alive without food and water and medical treatment.

I wasn't that surprised when Kyle made the decision to have Doc put Sunny back in Jodi's body. I was even less surprised when, after Sunny woke up, he had her promise to look for Jodi. To try to help wake her up, the way Melanie had been awake inside Wanda's head.

What did surprise me was how nice Kyle was to Sunny. I never thought he'd be purposely cruel, the way he was when Wanda first showed up, but this was something else.

It was like the day Kyle showed up with Sunny. She was always tucked into his side, terrified of almost everyone except him. And as devastated as I knew he was that Jodi hadn't woken up right away, he didn't seem to mind Sunny being there. It even seemed like he liked her. I knew Kyle was lonely, maybe having Sunny around would be good for him.

Then, a few days later, Jared and Melanie and Jamie were back. They'd found Wanda a body. It was a tiny, frail looking thing. Young. But Jared and Jamie said she looked innocent and trustworthy. And Melanie said Wanda wouldn't mind as long as she was alone in her head.

We waited a few days, just to make sure the girl wouldn't wake up. She didn't.

The next thing I knew I was standing in the hospital, Wanda's tank in my hands, watching Doc make a small cut on the neck of the tiny blond lying face down on the cot in front of me.

"Okay, Ian. Let me have Wanda," Doc said, reaching out to me.

I looked down at his open palm and shook my head.

He looked at me strangely. In fact, everyone in the room did—Jared, Melanie, even Jamie and Jeb.

"I want to do it," I explained.

Doc contemplated for a moment, I guess deciding whether or not it was possible for me to somehow screw this up. I knew there wasn't. I'd been there when they put Sunny back in Jodi. I'd seen just how Doc had done it. I didn't even really have to do anything, it was more up to Wanda at this point. Doc seemed to be thinking the same thing and nodded his consent.

I opened the cryotank and gently lifted Wanda's body, her real body, out. I'd been staring at her for almost a week now, but seeing her like this, in my hands, it was different. She was so beautiful, all shining and silver. Her body flowed and rippled in my hands.

"Ian," Doc prompted.

I looked at her for another moment before holding her to the opening on the girls neck. Wanda moved purposefully, quickly becoming one with her new host. She was... graceful.

Before I'd met Wanda, I never thought I'd ever think a moment like this could be beautiful and happy, but it was. Watching Doc close up the wound on Wanda's neck and Candy—the healer's host, she'd finally remembered her name—spray Awake in front of her face to help wake her up, it was the happiest and most anxious I'd ever been in my entire life.

Right up until the moment Wanda's eyes fluttered open.


	25. Together

**Stephenie Meyer owns The Host.**

Aww! You guys, this is the last chapter. Thank you everyone who read and reviewed and favorited and alerted this story. You guys are amazing and I love you all. When I started this I never thought it would get the response it did, and that's all thanks to you. So, I hope you enjoy the ending!

Also, remember 500th reviewer will get to choose a character from The Host and I will write a scene (of their choice) in that character's perspective. But since I realize that that might be a little unfair to the reader's who always review, seeing as you can only review once per chapter, I'll also do another contest. Same thing, but this time in your review include a character from The Host and a scene you think would be really interesting to read in their POV. I'll choose the one I think is most interesting or maybe the one that gets the most requests. Sound fair?

Blurring The Lines  
_Chapter 25_

I held Wanda's tiny hands in my own. I could feel her twitch every so often. I watched her eyes move around behind her eyelids. Was she waking up?

I leaned in close to her ear. "Wanderer?" I asked. "We're all waiting for you, honey. Open your eyes."

I kissed her briefly on the lips, then gently on both eyelids. Practically everyone in the caves was there watching, but it didn't matter. She was blinking. Wanda was waking up.

"She's waking up!" Jamie shouted excitedly from behind me, echoing my thoughts. He stood close to Jared and Melanie. They were right beside me next to Wanda's cot.

Wanda's eyes were open now and she was squinting up at the cracks in the hospital ceiling.

"Wanderer?" I said again, placing my hand lightly on her cheek

She turned toward me, looking me directly in the eye. "Ian? Ian, where am I?"

Her voice was different from the last time I'd spoken to her. It was a higher pitch than Melanie's. I'd never heard this body speak before, but it was Wanda. My heart thumped against my rib cage at the way she said my name, but she sounded frightened when she continued. "_Who_ am I?"

"You're you," I told her. "And you're right where you belong."

She pulled one of her hands from my grasp and reached for her face, but then froze. She seemed frightened for a second, but then realized what she was looking at. Her own hand.

She stared at her hand for a moment. It was small, smaller than Mel's. Her finger nails were even painted pink. So unlike Wanda.

"Where is she?" Wanda demanded the next second. "Where is Pet?"

"She's right here," Doc assured her. "Tanked and ready to go. We thought you could tell us the best place to send her."

Wanda turned to find Doc, a cryotank in his hands. "Doc!" she gasped. "Doc, you promised! You gave me your oath, _Eustace!_ Why? Why did you break your word?"

She looked so upset. It looked out of place on this face.

"Even an honest man sometimes caves to duress, Wanda," Doc said.

"Duress," Jared muttered.

"I'd say a knife to the throat counts as duress, Jared."

"You knew I wouldn't really use it," Jared stated.

"That I did not," said Doc. "You were quite persuasive."

"A knife?" Wanda trembled.

"Shh, it's all okay," I murmured to calm her. She reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. "Did you really think you could leave us that way? Wanda!" I sighed.

I was still a little angry that she had done what she had, but I couldn't be mad when she was right here. We could talk about it, now that she wouldn't feel like she was hurting anyone. Now that she was just Wanda, no longer Wanda and Melanie.

"I told you I didn't want to be a parasite," she whispered.

"Let me through," Melanie said then. I almost wanted to laugh. I was quickly learning that Mel was going to be a great ally when it came to Wanda.

"Listen up, Wanda," she said. "I know exactly what you don't want to be. But we're human, and we're selfish, and _we_ don't always do the right thing. We aren't going to let you go. Deal with it."

"Mel? Mel, you're okay!" Wanda cried. She was smiling up at Melanie like she hadn't seen her in years. I guess she wasn't expecting to ever see Mel like this, standing before her, in person.

"Of course I am. Wasn't that the point of all the drama? And you're going to be fine, too. We weren't stupid about it. We didn't just grab the first body we saw."

"Let me tell her, let me!" Jamie crowed, shoving in next to Mel to get a better look at Wanda.

"Jamie!" Wanda took his hand.

"Hey, Wanda! This is cool, isn't it? You're smaller than me now!" He grinned.

She grinned back. "But still older. I'm almost —" And then she stopped, cutting herself off mid sentence, like she'd just realized something. "My birthday is in two weeks."

She looked back at Jamie. "I'll be eighteen."

What? I was shocked, but I tried my best to keep it to myself.

When Melanie and Jared had first brought this body to Doc's we has all figured she was young. Probably about fourteen, maybe fifteen. I was okay with that. I knew it would probably take Wanda a while to become comfortable enough with me to be in a more intimate relationship. And, honestly, as long as she was safe and happy, I didn't care what kind of relationship we had. I would deal until she was old enough and had a chance to decide what she wanted. I had made my peace with that.

But she was eighteen? Of course, some people looked young. Just like some people looked older than their real age. It was possible.

I decided it didn't matter. Wanda was thousands of years old. She said her body was turning eighteen, than she was turning eighteen.

I watched Jamie pat Wanda's face to get her attention. "They let me come on the raid to get you."

"I know," she muttered. "I remember… Well, Pet remembers seeing you there." Then she leveled a glare at Mel.

"We tried not to scare her," Jamie said. "She's so… kind of fragile-looking, you know? And nice, too. We picked her out together, but I got to decide!" And then he went off on a rant about how they picked her body.

I wasn't listening, I'd already heard him tell this story three times. I was watching Wanda. Her new face was beautiful. Pale skin, golden freckles strewn over her cheeks and nose. Her hair was blond and shiny and I wanted to brush it back away from her face. Jamie was telling her how this body looked like her, and he was right. This is exactly what Wanda looked like. Sweet and fragile and kind and trustworthy. She was beautiful, inside and out.

"Ian didn't come," Jamie said, telling Wanda the part of the story I lived. "He just sat here with you—he said he didn't care what you looked like. He wouldn't let anyone else put a finger on your tank at all, not even me or Mel. But Doc let me watch this time. It was way cool, Wanda. I don't know why you wouldn't let me watch before. They wouldn't let me help, though. Ian wouldn't let anyone touch you but him."

I squeezed her hand, the one I still held, and leaned in close so only she would hear me. "I held you in my hand, Wanderer. And you were so beautiful."

As I leaned back I saw her eyes get watery and she sniffed. I smiled a little. She was happy.

"You like it, don't you?" Jamie asked, his voice worried. He didn't know it was what I said that had caused her to get all misty eyed. "You're not mad? There's nobody in there with you, is there?"

"I'm not mad, exactly," Wanda whispered. "And I—I can't find anybody else. Just Pet's memories. Pet's been in here since… I can't remember when she wasn't here. I can't remember any other name."

"You're not a parasite," Melanie told her. She was standing next to Jamie, playing with Wanda's hair. "This body didn't belong to Pet, but there's nobody else to claim it. We waited to make sure, Wanda. We tried to wake her up almost as long as we tried with Jodi."

"Jodi? What happened to Jodi?" Wanda cried. She struggled to sit up, so I helped her, keeping a hand on her back for support. She glanced around the circle of faces, the faces of her friends. Her family.

"Jodi didn't respond. We kept trying as long as we could," Doc answered. "We were able to keep her hydrated, but we had no way to feed her. We were worried about atrophy—her muscles, her brain…"

I could tell when Wanda saw Sunny. Her face lit up. "Sunny!"

"I got to stay," Sunny said. "Just like you. I'm trying, though. I am looking for her. I will keep looking."

"Kyle had us put Sunny back when it looked like we would lose Jodi," Doc explained quietly.

Wanda stared at Kyle and Sunny for a minute, looking a little shocked. Seeing as how Kyle had treated her when she first arrived, I could understand how she felt. She finished looking at our friends and finally turned back to me.

"You okay in there?" I asked, unsure of how she was feeling. It must have been a lot for her.

"I… I don't know," she admitted. "This feels very… weird. Every bit as weird as switching species. So much weirder than I would have thought. I… I don't know."

"You don't mind staying here _too_ much, do you, Wanda? Do you think that maybe you could tolerate it?" I murmured.

Jamie, Melanie and Jared piled their hands on top of Wanda's in support. Trudy stepped closer to pat her foot. Everyone was smiling at her, showing her how much we all wanted her here. Even Kyle was grinning at Wanda with Sunny, tucked into his side, smiling beside him.

Finally I reached out and brushed her hair away from her face, laying my hand on her cheek. I felt a shock when I touched her. The tingles were back, or still there, really. I loved her the same as I did before. It really didn't matter what body she was in, as long as it was Wanda inside.

She blushed a little. "I suppose I could do that," she whispered. "If it makes you happy."

"That's not good enough, actually," I disagreed. "It has to make _you_ happy, too."

Her eyes kept dropping to her lap, only meeting mine for a few seconds. And her blush was getting worse. It looked like Wanda was shy now. She had never been shy before, and I couldn't help but think she was going to hate it.

"I… think it might," she said. "I think it might make me very, very happy."

I smiled and gently lifted her face so she could meet my eyes. "Then you will stay," I said.

I kissed her. It felt right and perfect, just like it always did when I kissed Wanda. And she kissed me back, in front of all of our friends. I guessed we could work around her be found shyness.

"I will stay," she agreed.

After that, everything went back to normal. Or, sort of. Wanda was having a hard time adjusting to her new body. More than that, to her new role in the caves. She was used to being treated like a slave. Doing everything for everyone, people ignoring her most times. Now it was like she was a princess, the girl everyone loved.

Jared had been right about her face. It was like all the prejudices had just melted away overnight and now no one could not protect her. Everyone, not just me and Mel and Jared, would help her with chores or just tell her to go take a break and finish the job for her. It was nice to see, but Wanda hated the help. She complained about it, infrequently, but still.

Everyone's new attitude toward Wanda didn't end with chores. People were just generally nicer to her. People were constantly touching her, patting her head, stroking her hair, even pinching her cheeks. Even people who had been less than friendly with Wanda in the past did this.

There were some other changes I noticed as well. Wanda had always been beautiful, because Melanie was beautiful. But people had been cautious of her in Mel's body. Afraid. Now, Wanda was still beautiful, but she was also the exact opposite of scary. And people were responding to that.

Before, it was only Jared I had thought of as competition for Wanda's heart. Now, there a few other men who were... noticing her in that way. She wasn't their enemy anymore. She was a friend. Someone who had improved everyone's life here in the caves tremendously. Of course someone would realize what a kind, beautiful girl she was, but I had already had that realization a long time ago.

Wanda and I spent most of our time together, as we usually did, but now it was different. There was still that air of uncertainty between us. I knew I loved her, that hadn't changed. Nothing had changed on my part. I still held her hand all the time, cupped her face in my hands.

I didn't kiss her again though. I wasn't sure how she felt, and I didn't want to be presumptuous. If I took the relationship to the next level she would undoubtedly follow my lead, but I wanted to give her a choice. I figured she could use a little time to get settled and decide what she wanted.

I still caught her staring at Jared every once in a while. And he would stare back. It must have been hard for them, all of their feelings for one another. I could understand that it wasn't just going to go away because Wanda was in a different body. Even Melanie seemed to be having a little difficulty. There had been times when she would reach over and touch my hand or arm and then jerk back like I had burned her. If Mel was having those kinds of reactions to _me_, I could understand how Wanda was feeling.

But the uncertainty of our relationship, that all washed away with the rain. When the monsoons came everyone was forced to move into the gameroom. It was crowded, but better than sleeping in mud.

When Wanda had first woken up in her new body she had had to stay in the hospital with Doc. Jared and Melanie had kicked Jamie out of their room as soon as possible, so the kid was staying with me while Kyle was in the hospital with Jodi. Now Kyle was slowly working on building a new room for him and Sunny to stay in after the rains, because there just wasn't any room left anywhere else. Which sort of left Wanda hanging.

I wanted to invite her to stay in my room, but she'd have to share a mattress with either me or Jamie. And, while I was certain she wouldn't mind sharing with the kid, he hadn't offered.

The night we moved to the gameroom changed things though. Jamie and I had already carried our mattresses over, and now I was helping Wanda carry her cot—because she could never hope to even lift it on her own, let alone carry all the way to the gameroom.

"Over here, Wanda," Jamie called, waving at us. "There's room for all three of us now."

We walked over, Wanda ahead of me because I was trying to navigate all the mattresses while carrying the cot.

"You don't really want that cot, do you, Wanda?" Jamie asked. "I'll bet we could all fit okay on the mattresses if we shoved them together." He grinned at Wanda and kicked one of the mattresses until the two were touching. "You don't take up much space," he told her.

Without even waiting for Wanda and I to agree to his new sleeping arrangement, Jamie took the cot from me and placed it on the floor on it's side so it would be out of the way. Then he laid down on the mattress farthest from us. He rolled on his side, facing away from us, and said casually, "Oh, hey, Ian. I talked to Brandt and Aaron, and I think I'm going to move in with them. Well, I'm beat. Night, guys."

I stood, watching Jamie for a few seconds. Had he planned this? Giving me and Wanda the chance to be together? It seemed like a lot to pin on the kid, but he _was_ smart. Did he see the dance I was doing with Wanda and this was his way of saying "just get on with it already"?

Beside me, Wanda was looking Jamie the same way I was. If he had planned this, it was because he thought that giving me and Wanda this push would make her happy. Was he right? It was dark in here, but she looked a little shell shocked.

"Lights out," Jeb hollered across the crowded room. "Everybody shut yer trap so I can get some shut-eye."

Everyone settled onto there mattresses and dimmed the lights until the room was pitch black. I took Wanda's warm hand in mine and guided her to the mattress we were supposed to—according to Jamie—share. She laid down in the middle of the two mattresses, farther away from me then I would have liked, but I kept hold of her hand.

"Is this okay?" I whispered, keeping my voice low so that no one would be disturbed. I could still hear a few other conversations going on around us though, so I was sure no one would mind.

"Yes, thank you," she said.

Jamie rolled over and knocked right into Wanda. I felt the movements through the mattress.

"Oops, sorry, Wanda," he murmured, and then he yawned. It sounded a little forced.

That's when I knew for certain he had staged this whole thing. The kid was giving me an opportunity here. Like hell if I was going go waste it.

So when Wanda rolled out of Jamie's way and right into me, I didn't hesitate. I wrapped an arm around her as she tried to give me some space, holding her close to me. She must not have minded my arm around her too much, because she rolled so that she was facing me.

I pulled her closer.

"Is this okay?" she whispered, echoing my question.

I leaned closer, kissing her gently on the forehead. "Better than okay," I assured her.

We were quiet for a few minutes. Most of the other conversations had died down, so I leaned in close to Wanda's ear. "Wanda, do you think… ?" I began, quietly, but couldn't seem to find the right words.

"Yes?" she prompted, her breath warm against my neck.

"Well, it looks like I have a room all to myself now. That's not right."

"No," she agreed. "There's not enough space for you to be alone."

"I don't want to be alone," I said. "But…"

"But what?"

"Have you had enough time to sort things out yet?" I asked. "I don't want to rush you. I know it's confusing… with Jared…"

I didn't want it, but the jealousy was still there whenever I thought about Jared and Wanda. She would always love him, it wasn't going to just fade away, but I hoped she could get over him and be happy with me.

After a moment, she giggled. It wasn't really the reaction I was expecting.

"What?" I demanded.

"I was giving _you_ time to sort things out," she explained in a whisper. "I didn't want to rush _you_ —because I know it's confusing. With Melanie."

Melanie? I jumped a little at that. "You thought… ? But Melanie isn't you. I was never confused."

"And Jared isn't you." I could tell she was smiling. I couldn't see her in the dark, but I could hear it in her voice.

But as much as I wanted to smile back, there was still that lingering doubt. That jealousy. "But he's still Jared. And you love him," I said, and my voice sounded strained even to me.

"Jared is my past, another life," Wanda told me. "You are my present."

I had never heard more perfect words in my life. She was solidifying everything I'd hoped for for so long now. I closed my eyes and whispered, "And your future, if you want that."

"Yes, please," she said.

And then we were kissing and that was it. No more uncertainty. No more jealousy, if I could help it. We were in love and we were about to start our lives together. Finally, after so much drama and heartache, we would be happy.

When it was time to go on a raid, Wanda and I went together. There was no way she was going to stay behind—even though Jared and I, and even Jeb, had tried to convince her to. And as much as I hated the idea of Wanda being in danger, she was certainly looking forward to raiding again. I think it made her felt needed. It was the one thing in the caves that she could still do better than anyone else.

Especially since Sunny was out of the question. She wouldn't even let Kyle go on the raid. She had gone hysterical when he'd mentioned it.

Jared and, of course, Melanie, would be going with us. Aaron and Brandt had also volunteered.

We were all just getting everything settled at our secret cache where we kept the van and the moving truck when it happened. None of us had seem it coming. Maybe I was too busy with Wanda to notice. She was so excited—practically bouncing up and down—and I was laughing at her and holding her hand and _not_ paying enough attention to my surroundings.

That changed the second the lights shot out of the darkness at us. I squinted, but it was too late. The Seekers had already seen that there was no reflection from their light. Wanda was standing behind me, but, even if they'd seen her, I didn't think it would have helped.

This was it. It was all over. I could feel Wanda reaching for the cyanide pill she kept in her pocket and I reached for mine too. I wished I had forced her to stay behind in the caves. Now she was going to die like the rest of us.

Maybe, just maybe, the Seekers would save her. Maybe they could save her Soul and place it into another body. And then Wanda could come back one day and live with our family again, if the Seekers didn't get them first.

I prayed we would be the last of the casualties tonight.

"Steady, now, everybody just keep calm," one of the Seekers called out. "Wait, wait, don't be _swallowing_ anything! Jeez, get a grip! No, look!"

The Seeker turned his flashlight on himself. He was older looking, shaggy brown hair. Worn looking, not polished like the other Seekers I'd seen. And his eyes didn't reflect the light back at us. They were just brown.

"See?" he said. "Okay, now, you don't shoot us, and we won't shoot you. See?" He laid the gun he was holding on the ground. "C'mon, guys," he said to the rest of his group. They all holstered their weapons.

Everyone of them had weapons. Aaron had our only gun.

The man went on, but I was still staring wide eyed at him. He was human. "We found your cache here—clever, that; we were lucky to find it—and decided we'd hang out and make your acquaintance. It's not every day you find another rebel cell." He laughed. "Look at your faces! What? Did you think you all were the only ones still kickin'?"

"Think they're in shock, Nate," another man said.

"We scared them half to death," a woman said. "What do you expect?"

After a few more moments, Jared was the one who finally regained his composure enough to ask, "Who _are_ you?"

The man laughed again. "I'm Nate—nice to meet you, though you might not feel the same way just yet. This here's Rob, Evan, Blake, Tom, Kim, and Rachel along with me." He gestured to his group beside him. "There's twenty-two of us altogether, though."

Nate held out his hand and Jared took a breath before stepping forward to meet him.

"I'm Jared," he said with a smile. "This is Melanie, Aaron, Brandt, Ian, and Wanda. There are thirty-seven of us altogether."

When Jared said Wanda's name I took a step to block her from the others view. I had been to stunned at seeing humans, and so many of them, to realize that Wanda was still in danger. They wouldn't understand about her. They would try to hurt her if they realized what she is, and they outnumbered us. They had more weapons...

Nate blinked and his eyes widened. "Wow. That's the first time I've ever been one-upped on _that_ one."

Jared sounded startled. "You've found others?"

"There are three other cells separate from ours that we know of. Eleven with Gail, seven with Russell, and eighteen with Max. We keep in touch. Even trade now and then." Again, Nate laughed. "Gail's little Ellen decided she wanted to keep company with my Evan here, and Carlos took up with Russell's Cindy. And, of course, everyone needs Burns now and then —" He stopped talking suddenly and glanced around. His eyes settling on a tall red headed man who was standing a little apart from their group. The man, I realized, I was looking at Wanda.

"Might as well get that out of the way," the man next to Nate said.

Nate was watching us carefully. "Okay. Rob's right. Let's get this out there." He took a breath and said, "Now, you all just take it easy and hear us out. Calmly, please. This upsets people sometimes."

"Every time," Rob said. I noticed how his hand was hovering close to his holstered gun.

"What?" Jared asked, suspiciously.

Nate waved the red headed man forward. "This here is Burns. Now, he's with us, so don't go crazy. He's my best friend—saved my life a hundred times. He's one of our family, and we don't take kindly to it when people try to kill him."

One of the women slowly raised her gun.

"No, it's okay, Nate," the redhead, Burns, said. "See? They've got one of their own." He pointed right at Wanda and I ground my teeth together. "Looks like I'm not the only one who's gone native."

He grinned at Wanda and abruptly walked toward us, toward Wanda, his hand extended in front of him. He was a Soul, I realized.

Without another word, Wanda stepped around me to meet this guy Burns.

"Wanda, don't. I don't think..." But she wasn't listening to me.

"Burns Living Flowers," he said, taking her hand.

"Wanderer," she introduced herself.

His being a Soul should have made me feel better, but he was smiling at her in a way that set me on edge.

"It's… extraordinary to meet you, Wanderer. And here I thought I was one of a kind," he said.

"Not even close," Wanda told him. Yeah, between her and Sunny, this guy wasn't as unique as he would like to think.

"Is that so?" he said. "Well, maybe there's some hope for this planet, after all."

I was jealous. Again.

I knew I shouldn't be. I knew Wanda loved me. I knew she didn't even realize how this Burns guy was looking at her. She didn't notice things like that, she was too innocent.

But I was still jealous. I didn't like the way he said her name. "It's... extraordinary to meet you, Wanderer." Wow. Seriously?

I wanted to run over there and wrap my arms around Wanda's tiny little body. I wanted to be possessive, show him she was mine. I didn't because I knew, better than almost anyone, what would happen if I rushed toward Burns. The others, the humans with Burns, they all had their hands on their weapons. They were ready for a fight, and I wasn't going to make any sudden moves. I didn't think they'd actually shoot, but it still wouldn't be the most diplomatic way to start things off.

Wanda was smiling. "It's a strange world," she said.

It surprised me that she was repeating what I had said to her the first time we spoke. Well, the first time she spoke to me of her own free will, anyway. But somehow, those words just seemed to fit this moment perfectly.

"The strangest," Burns murmured.

It was true. According to Wanda, Earth was the only world that had ever made her question her actions toward her host. It was the only world she felt comfortable on. It was her home. Wanda belonged here, with me. How could two people of different species falling in love not be considered strange?

I knew then, watching Wanda turn her head to smile at me, that nothing would ever come between us. No matter what happened in the future, Wanda and I would always be able to count on each other.

Through everything that had happened, Jared and Melanie had never once lost faith in each other. They both knew that nothing could come between them. Not Wanda, not me. Nothing.

And looking at Wanda now, I knew that nothing would ever come between the two of us. She was mine, and I would always be hers.


End file.
